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- Hide Preview | 456 Comments | submitted 10 months ago by needsomehelp3211 [Post Locked]

Summary: You CANNOT win over a woman by giving her expensive shit, even (especially) your SO or wife. Not only is it ineffective, it will decrease her respect for you.

There's been a lot of discussion in the manosphere about value and how to demonstrate it. Many men, unfortunately, mistake what this means and what it entails. "Demonstrate value?" they ask. "Well, I'm an engineer working at Amazon making $120,000, I have super duper value right??? Now how to demonstrate it... I know, I'll buy my woman lots of things so she knows I have value and I love her."

Stop.

Wrong.

Do not pass go, do not collect $200 (in fact you'll be losing a lot more than that in child support payments soon). It is true that money does make a woman more likely to sleep with a man, but if you want any respect or actual attraction from her, you have to demonstrate it in ways that shows your value is for YOU. Not her. You.

Think I'm joking around? Read what happens to the guy who didn't learn this lesson. Full thread here.

Fair warning, the original post is pretty long:

Ten years ago I thought I had the perfect life. Upper six-figure job, beautiful wife, clean house, two new cars, and a child on the way. My job made me happy and I was good at it, and the stability was great. My wife loved me for me and ignored my flaws as I tried to perfect them. In return, I adored her and we seemed to be the perfect couple. People would always compliment us, and talk about how envious they were of our relationship and everything.

It kept getting better. I kept getting promotions, the kids (now 3) were born, and we eventually moved from an ordinary house to an incredibly nice one. My wife was doing very well in her career (optometrist), and we took fun vacations every year. Again, I thought I had it made.

I don't know how this would have prompted it, but in early 2015, I bought her a Tesla, for her birthday. She hadn't gotten a new car since 2008, and I kept getting new cars, therefore I surprised her. She loved it, loved me, and I remember spending that entire day just taking rides in it and figuring out how all of the gadgets and icons worked.

It was complete downhill from there. I don't know how that would have triggered anything, but in the months following, she became increasingly distant from not only me, but our children. My oldest (10, F) in particular, felt hurt by this and would often try to ensue conversations with her mother, in order to get her talking. Some days this would work and she would be pleasant, others it would have the opposite effect.

The first time I suspected that I was no longer her man of choice was in July 2016 when I noticed she was no longer going to yoga classes, but telling me she was. We were on the same phone plan, and part of that plan was we could see our locations of our phones. I was routinely browsing the app one day, and noticed she appeared to be at someone's house. Since she had been irrationally angry that day prior to leaving, I didn't question her about it when she got home from "yoga." Instead, I chose to closely observe where she went during her "yoga" times. It would always seem to end up at the same house - a well-off neighborhood (probably a step above ours) a little north of town.

I was getting ready to confront her when I noticed that she had been returning to yoga again. During this period, she became incredibly distant, and hormonal. My entire family had noticed this behavior going on for over a year now, but I had had enough. I sat her down, and asked her what was going on. She gave me the cold shoulder, and when I questioned her about the yoga locations, she accused me of stalking, invading privacy, and being a "grade-A dick."

That's when I asked her: "are you cheating on me?" Of course, the answer was no. What followed in the weeks to come was distrust, hatred, and plain anger towards me. It was clear she knew I had caught on, and was now trying to play the "I-can't-believe-you'd-think-this" victim card. But I knew. I saw through it all.

When she finally admitted she had seen and slept with another man, that's when I made my mistake. I forgave her. She told me she loved me, she loved our family, and in that moment, I believed her. I thought she could change. I was wrong.

We tried marriage therapy. We tried taking adult days. It seemed to work. We were happy, and she was genuinely having fun and it seemed like I had the old her back. I was relieved, this allowed me to pour more time into my kids and my work, and have less stress overall.

My business trip to San Diego (I live on the East Coast, USA) was cut short when my colleague fell ill, and our clients insisted that we reschedule. It was a hassle, but I we caught the next flight out, and returned home.

I'm not sure why I didn't tell her I was coming home, but I just didn't. Maybe I wanted it to be a surprise? The only surprise I received when I pulled into the driveway was seeing a Ford SUV in my garage, and finding not one, but TWO men in my bed. With my wife.

This all happened yesterday. I'm finally putting it into words. My wife started babbling when it happened, desperately trying to explain. I heard none of it. I walked out of my room, went to the basement, and poured myself a drink. I could hear the men upstairs leaving, and when I returned upstairs, it was my wife sitting there, clothed, with a sad smile on her face.

She started talking, but I wouldn't have it. I told her to get out. I told her to get out of my house. I informed her that I'd get her stuff to her by the end of the week. She tried to pull the "what-about-the-kids" bullshit, but I was just done. I'm sad, but not for her. I'm sad for my kids, and I'm sad for whatever poor soul she meets next.

I will fight hard for my kids, but my biggest fear is losing them. I know the court will rule incredibly in favor of mothers. I hope they realize that I've spent the last three years doing my best to mend a broken marriage for my family, and nothing has worked.

Let's dissect this from a RedPill perspective.

1) Upper six figure job, which means basically millionaire. Someone may look at this and think that alone means this guy's the ultimate alpha male. Well... turns out that isn't the case. Money means nothing if you're an orbiter and provider at heart. It just makes you a fatter golden goose in the eyes of your woman.

2) Bought her a Tesla as a surprise (ie spent >$100,000 grand). Gentlemen, this kind of gift giving does not have the effect you think it will have. It doesn't bring her closer to you or cement your love, it actually diminishes her attraction. Women are binary. There are men who make their panties tingle, and men who make their purses tingle. You CANNOT be both, even though it's a nice pie-in-the-sky dream to be that perfect man. OP found out the hard way. The Tesla just hammered in his status as a subservient provider.

3) "Couples' therapy". Honestly, by the time you even get to the point where someone utters these words, the war is lost. First of all most therapists are women and will be actively sabotaging the therapy sessions. Secondly therapy is just talking. And if there's one thing that dries up a woman's vagina faster than a gob of spit in the Sahara, it's a man trying to beg and "discuss" his way into her heart. You cannot negotiate attraction.

The way to show value through money is to spend it on yourself. Buy yourself some dope shit show it off. By a Tesla for you. Wear the most expensive brands if you feel like it. But above all else, make sure she gets the point that you're doing it selfishly and that she has to earn every penny you bestow upon her.

TL;DR: Demonstrating value does not mean showering somebody with gifts and attention. It means showering YOURSELF with gifts and attention and showing that you're #1.

[-] KookyDonut 504 Points 10 months ago

Couple's Therapy must be one of the biggest fucking scams going around, I think.

[-] FrankCostanza111 234 Points 10 months ago

My ex-wife and I went to a marriage therapist. After 3 sessions he (he therapist) agreed with me that the marriage seemed fucked and that I should get out if I wanted to. Despite having an infant. Dude kept it real and even told me that he slapped a woman before and that “sometimes they just deserve it.”

Definitely not what I was expecting. Your mileage may vary.

[-] aDrunkenWhaler 17 Points 10 months ago

Exactly. The role of the marriage therapist is to help the clients figure themselves out, and their relationship, and not to save the marriage. That's the biggest misconceptions people have. But unfortunatelly most therapists suck at their job, and at life, and have a plethora of issues they can't figure out for themselves.

[-] ozaku7 6 Points 10 months ago

Most of them become therapists because they have been in atleast two marriages that sucked and suddenly consider themselves experts. Much like every idiot with a DSLR camera and shitty watermark logos names itself a photographer.

[-] Idontlikeredditors6 7 Points 10 months ago

My ex wife begged me to go to marriage counseling with her. Two sessions after I gave in, she didn't want to go anymore.

I think a lot of marriage counselors are more in tune with women's bullshit than people think. That said, if you're going to couples therapy, it's almost definitely too late.

[-] [deleted] 1 Point 10 months ago

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[-] [deleted] 10 months ago
[-] [deleted] 10 months ago
[-] Overkillengine 207 Points 10 months ago

The only reason to go along with that is to buy time planning your exit strategy while checking a "Gee your honor, I REALLY tried but it didn't work out" box to make you look better in court.

[-] empatheticapathetic 71 Points 10 months ago

If you act like a pussy in the sessions and get the therapist on your side you can effectively get the woman to dismiss the therapy as an option. My bro in law managed this.

[-] the_banyan 12 Points 10 months ago

Can attest — this works. Went into couples therapy with a cheater once and initially the therapist was clearly biased against me with no basis, so I assume, sexism. As time went on though it became clear to her that I was being fair and reasonable and my ex was being a manipulative hysterical loon. The therapist started sympathizing more with me and wanting my ex to address some things and poof, ex no longer wanty the therapy. She was all about it before because I think she thought she could “win” at therapy.

[-] Rodion-Raskolnikov 5 Points 10 months ago

This exact same thing happened to me. After four sessions my LTR of the time wanted to stop going because it was clear to the therapist that I was a good partner and she was a selfish, vain, unreasonable sociopath.

[-] warthundersfw 2 Points 10 months ago

Get the therapist to dismiss it? What are you trying to say?

[-] empatheticapathetic 8 Points 10 months ago

Get your partner to realise therapy was a failed attempt at getting you to submit because you are aware of the game she is attempting to play.

[-] OhhDatDogOMine -1 Point 10 months ago

Or you can laugh at the girl for suggesting the idea and proceed to fuck her.

[-] empatheticapathetic 8 Points 10 months ago

When attraction is gone and it’s now a matter of achieving the best logistics in your favour before the inevitable divorce, this is irrelevant.

[-] OhhDatDogOMine 3 Points 10 months ago

Agreed.

I have a better alternative though, don't marry.

[-] FrankCostanza111 57 Points 10 months ago

Correct. You must check every box before pulling the trigger.

[-] Gearski 5 Points 10 months ago

to make you look better in court.

Is there any point to this? You're going to lose in court no matter how hard you tried, most likely.

[-] Overkillengine 17 Points 10 months ago

All the more reason to burn up liquid assets prior to the divorce papers being filed then.

[-] Psychocist 5 Points 10 months ago

My God. I hope I die on the honeymoon if I ever get married. Didn't even realise until reading some of these stories that countless men actually go through this every day.

[-] arphod 3 Points 10 months ago

Welcome...to the desert...of the real.

[-] Pope_Lucious 81 Points 10 months ago

Unhappy with your marriage?

Have you tried more obligations with no sex?

[-] SexWaffles 16 Points 10 months ago

Marriage may seem binding, but the hamster always finds another wheel.

[-] nester79 24 Points 10 months ago

Agreed. Completely stupid. It's mostly for people who can't rip the bandaid off.

[-] sprafa 41 Points 10 months ago

I was redpilled (in a soft way) by a female therapist. I wouldn’t underestimate it

[-] AussiecuntTRP 5 Points 10 months ago

Psychotherapy is not a bad idea and can definitely help. I'm sure a lot of clinical psychologists are RP lite. The author of No More Mr Nice Guy for example is a psychotherapist. It's just couples counselling which is the scam ie. "have you tried making a schedule for sex" type of shit.

[-] htowntrav 2 Points 10 months ago

That’s an interesting idea

[-] jwarner95 24 Points 10 months ago

I'm starting to think that about therapy in general.

[-] willowhawk 9 Points 10 months ago

Some therapy is pretty useless other types have been shown to be effective at dealing with a range of issues.

[-] dankmemem88 4 Points 10 months ago

It has helped me immensely. The majority of change in my life did come from me internally, but the therapy did help provide that initial ground that I needed. You just need to be willing to put in the effort on your own.

[-] Psychocist 3 Points 10 months ago

I think everyone should go through a period of therapy, even as a simple exploratory venture if nothing else, but definitely if they think they need help. I put it off for many years until I came dangerously close to a legitimate suicide attempt. I then lost one of my parents as I was coming out of that therapy.. and have since spent the last 6 months almost entirely alone while travelling and not gone mental. To say that it has strengthened my state of mind is an understatement.

As someone else said, the type of therapy matters. I went from CBT to ACT (acceptance-commitment therapy). I found ACT much more comparable to the mindset I was trying to cultivate. The essence of it is: instead of moving away from pain, accept it exists, and move towards your values.

CBT is more about techniques, whereas ACT is more about attitude. If you are grieving, in CBT you will be guided towards methods to deal with the thoughts in a more methodical or emotionally mature manner. In ACT you will be guided to loosen your grip on the thoughts entirely through acceptance of them and focus on actions which match your values. In other words, it's training you to simply move on in a very healthy manner.

Highly advise therapy. But find a good therapist. I think anyone who humbles themselves enough to open up the deepest recesses of their mind for examination and development is going to learn something about themselves. How could they not?

[-] jwarner95 6 Points 10 months ago

I think more people would benefit from $10 of LSD than thousands of dollars of therapy though.

[-] Psychocist 4 Points 10 months ago

I mean.. for the 2 years I was in therapy, I probably had 8 or 10 big LSD trips, and, for the 5 years before that likely around 30 trips. That drug has without a doubt had a significantly healthy effect on my state of mind. But even 5 years of using that on a nearly pure self-improvement level, the 2 years of therapy that followed still had a powerfully beneficial effect.

Some people take LSD and breakdown and end up in depression. It is silly to play with psychedelics without understanding them.. I think both LSD and therapy are a good mix. I frequently spoke to my therapist about trips I'd had and insights. We learned from each other, in a way.

[-] jwarner95 1 Point 10 months ago

Would you have improved on your own without the 2 years of therapy? I had a 2 or so month stint of therapy, and I feel like my self improvement was stunted as I had to shift everything I had learned to do on my own over for everything my therapist had offered for me. Afterwards I realized I was on the right path and that therapy wasn't the right option for me. Psychedelics is what sparked this journey towards self improvement years ago, and I don't think therapy has helped me progress at all. I can agree with you that therapy is probably immensely helpful for some, but it is ultimately reliant on the individual, and not being receptive to therapy shouldn't be seen as a flaw, more so as a benefit in that you can rely on your innate resources.

[-] Psychocist 2 Points 10 months ago

Would you have improved on your own without the 2 years of therapy

Hard to say. But, as I said, I was using psychedelics on a self-improvement level for 5 years. By that, I mean I went as deep as I could on solo trips, hardly ever took it to "have a good time". And yet I would say I matured on a different level due to therapy.

One big difference is that during big psychedelic trips you don't have your ego along for the ride. So while you might experience many great insights, they aren't in context to your actual worldview when you come down. In therapy, I am not high on drugs and so have to approach all of my problems very much in the trenches. Though I could have gotten there through psychedelics if I had the belief system I have now, in the end, it took therapy to breakdown down the dam. This is mainly why I think doing both therapy + LSD is a great combination (Doorway to The Numinous is an excellent book on clinical studies on psychedelics).

As for my original point, though perhaps it is too extreme to say everyone should go to therapy, I do believe the vast majority of people are not behaving rationally, and are insecure, infantile morons with no handle on reality. Look what we've divulged into with social media. Plenty of this behaviour is based on faulty self-beliefs, lack of confidence, need for validation, need for belonging, fear of loneliness, etc, etc, -- all things that therapy would greatly help with over a controlled time. We wouldn't engage in half of this drivel if we didn't feel the need to.

Going back to psychedelics, though it would be fun, I think LSD would be a stick of dynamite if released into that. I hope Black Mirror do an episode on it some time! :P

[-] jwarner95 1 Point 10 months ago

Hmm that's actually a great point (your second to last paragraph), and I agree so long as the therapist isn't one of those brainwashed monkeys as well. I'll look into that book as well, thanks for the discussion.

[-] Psychocist 2 Points 10 months ago

and I agree so long as the therapist isn't one of those brainwashed monkeys

Yup! Finding a good therapist is probably hard work itself. I got lucky after a couple.

[-] [deleted] 1 Point 10 months ago

I'm pretty sure the whole world (the dream) is designed to cause pain and misery to point you to looking within for happiness.

Given your psychedelic usage there is a high chance you will understand what I mean by this so leaving this comment here :)

[-] jwarner95 0 Points 10 months ago

Yeah of course I know what you mean! I really think everyone on this sub would benefit greatly from psychedelics, as its teachings and the visions they promote go hand in hand.

[-] [deleted] 1 Point 10 months ago

They are a useful tool, taken maybe once, to show there is more to "life" than we know it...but I don't recommend multiple use, they give you extremely bad energy, and when you are tripping you are basically an open vessel to any kind of energy, karma, and anything else that exists out there, including entities, etc.

[-] [deleted] 10 months ago
[-] jwarner95 1 Point 10 months ago

To refine my point a bit, because of its high cost I disagree on your initial statement that everyone should try therapy at some points in their lives, as I don't believe it is universally helpful and that everyone truly needs it. I think only those with major grievances and life traumas should follow that rule.

[-] [deleted] 10 months ago
[-] furiouszeno 23 Points 10 months ago

First of all most therapists are women and will be actively sabotaging the therapy sessions.

I want to second this for anyone who doesn't believe it. I have been to counselling sessions for one marriage and another LTR, and its a big shit show. Almost all marriage/couples counselors are women, and despite what they say, they WILL take the side of the woman.

[-] conflagratorX 6 Points 10 months ago

I was in couple therapy with my LTR. Therapist was old ugly lady. And she was pretty red-pilled and usually took my side. I think you need to target older people to have decent therapy

[-] TX_Gun_Hand 6 Points 10 months ago

Man... I even called mine out on it in the middle of a session. Fuck that bs

[-] BurningOrangeHeaven 17 Points 10 months ago

You have no idea. A friend of mine married a chick a few years back, her family runs the church, the grandfather or father(didnt care to learn much about them) is the pastor and hollly fuck, they had my boy doing couples therapy with THEM before they even married.

Dude was so brainwashed, we tried to sit him down but it was obviously too little too late.

[-] acetylcysteine 12 Points 10 months ago

Most religious weddings require couples sessions/therapy before the priest will marry them. Not uncommon.

[-] BurningOrangeHeaven 4 Points 10 months ago

No it was ongoing, not a one and done. We went for drinks and he was filling out some papers and thats how we found out, weekly quiz type shit.

[-] acetylcysteine 15 Points 10 months ago

yes. that's what i'm referring to.

[-] BurningOrangeHeaven 1 Point 10 months ago

Oh i didnt know it was a thing - none of my friends heard of shit like that before lol.

[-] [deleted] 3 Points 10 months ago

They're probably morman. They're into that "pre-therapy to curb divorce" bullshit. Never works becasue you can't tame the hamster.

[-] MormonRedPill 2 Points 10 months ago

The Mormon standard is a simple ecclesiastical interview, mostly to ensure that the couple knows exactly what they're getting into. The bishop will typically give some advice, but not on the level of therapy. The Handbook specifically says, "No priesthood officer is to counsel a person whom to marry. Nor should he counsel a person to divorce his or her spouse. Those decisions originate and remain with the individual."

So it's basically a meeting to say, "If you want to do this, we'll support you, but make sure you actually want to do this."

[-] haroldpeters 1 Point 10 months ago

I disagree.. I did that with my first wife, and the only thing that came out of it was I thought she drunk too much.. I give you two guesses to why we divorced. The only issue with it was that nothing was done to address what was identified.. but that is entirely my fault.

[-] [deleted] 10 months ago
[-] Freedom2speech 15 Points 10 months ago

It is. I tried it once and it was all about how I was the bad guy. Fuck that shit never again.

[-] Bruchibre 6 Points 10 months ago

There is no one single post in relationship advice where someone doesn't bring up "you need therapy", "you need counseling". Drives me mad :)

[-] I_am_Jax_account 2 Points 10 months ago

Therapy in general is a fucking scam. I tried for several months to ask people who had been to therapy exactly "what" it did to help. What was said. What exact words lead to your "epiphany". I never got a single goddamn answer. I got idioms and metaphors and bullshit and I decided right there that it's a fucking scam and psychologists don't know any more about relationships or how to fix them than your neighbor.

[-] Twentyfivedeep 21 Points 10 months ago

Therapy is only really useful for those with a lack of introspection. If you already have a healthy level of introspection, the best therapy is meditation.

[-] WhirlingDeath 6 Points 10 months ago

I've noticed when I stop trying to "fix" anxiety is when I have it the least. The more I actively try to solve the problem the worse it gets.

These days I just notice the anxiety is there and still just do what I was going to do anyway, even if my heart is racing and my face is red and I'm sweating.

[-] acetylcysteine 1 Point 10 months ago

No. Just no. Therapy is not a scam. It is better than being heavily medicated. I suggest everyone sees a therapist, it’s healthy. Just because they can’t identify the what made the change doesn’t mean it didn’t work. Unless you are educated in CBT and other methods you won’t understand the framework of how these therapies work and produce results.

[-] I_am_Jax_account 2 Points 10 months ago

Who said these people had a change? A lot didn't. I actually considered seeing a therapist at one point but if the best thing anyone, including therapists, can give me is abstractions and metaphors for $200/hr then I'll just find a philosophy book. Doctors tell me exactly what they are going to do for a surgery. My accountant tells me how he came up with the numbers he has. A chef can tell me exactly how he made his food. I need explicit examples of why expertise is needed to "work through problems by talking" or else you are just scamming me. Why is it so hard to come up with a coherent sentence about CBT?

[-] [deleted] 10 months ago
[-] RedwallAllratuRatbar 1 Point 10 months ago

I've read something about CBT, and to my understanding, it's something even friends could do if they actually care. It's just reframing things, you only need therapist to give you some opinions that you can't see because it's hard to see yourself objectively

[-] warthundersfw 1 Point 10 months ago

My ex had a couple of renowned psychologists in the family and extended. They had relationship issues up the wazoo, total trainyard wreck

[-] [deleted] 10 months ago
[-] cat_magnet 437 Points 10 months ago

You guys really have this wrong. She wasn't a unicorn one day then getting railed by two chads the next. There would have been plenty of red flags (previous sexual history etc) but the op decided to ignore it cause he was a high income beta and she was hotter than he could ever get without money.

[-] WaterHound 216 Points 10 months ago

This is a very good point. I know very FEW women that are the "oops, I've got two guys in my bed..." who are also 'marriage-material' according to those who have both eyes open.

I know AWALT, but even then, my experience is that even women don't one day randomly make the jump from serial monagamy up to "Threesome in my husbands bed" overnight. There's a slew of red flags this guy probably never noticed or just outright ignored.

[-] ramfex21 102 Points 10 months ago

He must have been ignoring red flags if he simply forgave her the first time he caught her cheating. She would have done it before

[-] smallpoly 138 Points 10 months ago

If you forgive a cheater, all you do is teach them that cheating is forgivable.

[-] BewareTheOldMan 12 Points 10 months ago

...second your comment - the moment you forgive infidelity you are saying "it's okay you stepped out of the relationship based on complete and utter disrespect for marriage, the relationship, and the children." All the talking, crying. wailing, forgiving, and marital counseling is useless.

I can account for the truly RARE EXCEPTION, but most times it's ineffective and prolongs the inevitable divorce.

It's too much - especially after being nothing but a great husband and father. At least the guy had the stones to end the marriage.

Based on his income and the mother's basic emotional abandonment of the kids, along with the infidelity he might have a really good shot at custody.

Bottom line: You CANNOT win over a woman by giving her expensive shit

TRP Conformed...yet again.

[-] [deleted] -2 Point 10 months ago

[deleted]

[-] ex_addict_bro 18 Points 10 months ago

No matter what you feel, trp is teaching us things do not work this way.

[-] VeTech16 8 Points 10 months ago

I mean, if i were his place i would have ditched her, but i just stated the reason as to why he didn't.

[-] ex_addict_bro 7 Points 10 months ago

You don’t know this

Maybe he was a beta pussy

Maybe he wanted to avoid divorce costs

People hamster a lot

[-] VeTech16 5 Points 10 months ago

Sure, these are also the possibilities

[-] ex_addict_bro 0 Points 10 months ago

The fact that you typed “he loved her” is a projection and speaks more about you than anything else.

[-] Tarkakabhai 3 Points 10 months ago

Once a cheater always a ___.

[-] VeTech16 2 Points 10 months ago

But love blinds the Logical Quotient of a non-red-pilled guy

[-] Bruchibre 8 Points 10 months ago

he must be color blind. All flags are grey to him.

[-] ColdIceZero 11 Points 10 months ago

"When you wear rose-colored glasses, all the red flags just look like flags."

[-] Redpiller77 6 Points 10 months ago

I need another season of Bojack Horseman.

[-] Troll_Name 1 Point 10 months ago

He must have been ignoring red flags if he simply forgave her the first time he caught her cheating. She would have done it before

He was a Good Little Boy.

He did as he was told, which includes believing what he was told. He was told to ignore his senses, silence his gut instinct, lobotomize his self-preservation capacity, inject soy concentrate into his scrotum, and go play videogames in the backyard shed while his wife is having her "me time."

Doing as you're told is a railroad to camp cuckoobird.

[-] CP9ANZ 1 Point 10 months ago

I bet she was getting double railed the first time when she was caught out, he just didn't know it.

[-] [deleted] 53 Points 10 months ago

Well there was, that is his ex-wife was skipping yoga sessions to fuck another dude, and OP knew about it for several months, then when he finally confronted her, she admitted it after some time had passed with OP forgiving her.

You never forgive a cheater, once a cheater always a cheater.

[-] Unboundaries 29 Points 10 months ago

Not so much once a cheater always a cheater. Cheating is an ACT, that is led forth by certain character traits that men need to be proactive in identifying: deceitful, dishonest, disloyal, insecurity, lack of self-esteem.

If she tells you white lies, or big lies, or moderate lies, you know that you're dealing with a woman who has no issues lying to you. You need not get serious with any woman you catch lying in any way. Because prolonged time with her, and marriage, will lead to her fucking other men, and of course, lying about it, because you've let her lie to you for so long.

If she tells you any lies early on, you know you're in bed with a liar. That will lie to you now, and later. This is a big mistake guys make discarding white lies. If she lies at all, she's a liar. Period.

[-] architectintx 3 Points 10 months ago

nailed this one on the head.

[-] truedemocracy3 1 Point 10 months ago

I don't get how he let that one slide. You follow her once and that's all the evidence you fucking need

[-] ozaku7 8 Points 10 months ago

Exactly this. TRP makes women look like complete trainwrecks and they take AWALT so heavily that it's like the sub trains only posts trainwrecks and implies that all trains are destined to crash. You never really find a normal guy posting here because he has no reason to.

[-] Coptek91 2 Points 9 months ago

When 50% of marriages end in divorces and 75% are initiated by women. AWALT

Not even counting the men in miserable fucking marriages that don't want to lose their children.

The guy in this OP also had a "regular marriage" for 9 out of the 10 years.

AWALT doesn't literally mean 100% of women are like that. It means that 99% of them are and you're better off realizing that then being some schmuck that thinks he has a unicorn.

[-] ozaku7 1 Point 9 months ago

Maybe most men end up being like Peter Griffing, Homer Simpson, or a Randy Marsh. Men are typically the laid back ones in relationships and once comfortable, don't shy away from coming home, being tired from work, acting like dicks in general and sipping their beer at their shitty sports game.

Women are typically the more active ones, who want to enjoy life, and if you become a man that is sucking the life out of other people in the later stages of life or prove that you rather need a mommy instead of a partner, you will end up being divorced.

So the question is really, are women cunts for destroying so many marriages, or do they simply refuse to remain with a loser who has practically given up on life? Most men are blind to problems in the relationship, because we all know that when it comes to problems, women shut up and need the guy to figure it out themselves as an act of bitterness.

[-] [deleted] 10 months ago
[-] meltboro -1 Point 10 months ago

Bs, awalt unless you somehow establish the status op is talking about

[-] Gozsayin2 1 Point 10 months ago

Exactly im sure he was thinking about his 3 kids thought. That said if he was really thinking about them he would picked better

[-] MattyAnon 32 Points 10 months ago

There would have been plenty of red flags (previous sexual history etc) but the op decided to ignore it cause he was a high income beta and she was hotter than he could ever get without money.

She wasn't a unicorn to start with, because there are no unicorns. Women get sexually bored after 1-3 years, and every girl has red flags.

You can't prevent this kind of thing happening, but you can easily avoid marriage.

[-] [deleted] 17 Points 10 months ago

[deleted]

[-] ozaku7 3 Points 10 months ago

Because it's the danger, yet the potential of protection that gets them the tingles. Fucking good men is like fucking a prostitute. It's in personal, boring, plain. There is no thrill.

[-] truedemocracy3 3 Points 10 months ago

Not if you want kids though. Face it - no decent woman will have out of wedlock kids

If you want your own kids and you want them to have a good upbringing and good genetic profile you absolutely have to marry

[-] MattyAnon 2 Points 10 months ago

Not if you want kids though. Face it - no decent woman will have out of wedlock kids

And no man that isn't retarded would marry. No decent woman would insist on a ridiculous contract like modern marriage.

If you want your own kids and you want them to have a good upbringing and good genetic profile you absolutely have to marry

I would never pay the mother of my children to abandon them, and this the exact definition of modern marriage. "Leave us and I'll pay your alimony" or "Leave me, take the kids and I'll pay your alimony". And that's before the house, car and legal fees.

[-] truedemocracy3 1 Point 10 months ago

ah so basically every senator, president, CEO, millionaire, billionaire, etc is a retard then? Glad to know that.

[-] MattyAnon 2 Points 10 months ago

ah so basically every senator, president, CEO, millionaire, billionaire, etc is a retard then?

Not all of them no. Only the ones that marry.

[-] Coptek91 1 Point 9 months ago

LOL so damn true. There are WAY too many fucking blue pillers in here nowadays. It's not a problem that they're blue pilled, it's a problem that these morons continue commenting and posting as if they know better. AWALT

[-] MattyAnon 2 Points 9 months ago

There are WAY too many fucking blue pillers in here nowadays

I've noticed this a lot recently.

"Do it for yourself" and "Self improvement first, women come later" are both just repackaged useless "just be yourself" advice that has been misleading men for centuries and foiling any attempts to develop an effective sexual strategy.

Then there's "money is attractive if I CHOOSE to spend it on her"... as if being a willing beta bucks is any better than an unwilling one.

And my personal favourites: "so I've found this unicorn" and "if I am red pilled enough, I can safely marry, because I know TRP so well. and dread".

The dilution of the message is fucking retarded. At least we have good EC's and Mods to keep people mostly on point.

[-] [deleted] 10 months ago
[-] truedemocracy3 -1 Point 10 months ago

Then enjoy not passing on your genes. I on the other hand plan on it.

[-] MattyAnon 3 Points 10 months ago

I am talking about marriage, not kids.

If you have kids then great. But don't offer the woman a one-sided providership contract that makes it beneficial for her to leave you.

[-] [deleted] 9 months ago
[-] jesper_lundqvist 27 Points 10 months ago

What you have to bear in mind is that the author is (almost) certainly blue-pilled, so he wouldn't have noticed those red flags because they were invisible to him. As far as he was concerned, he was just fulfilling the obligations of a husband in the 21st century. He only saw cause for concern when confronted with warning signs no reasonable person could ignore.

That's not to say that there weren't warning signs that we would find very clear; just that they likely wouldn't have been suspicious to him unless he were red-pilled. It stands as a precautionary tale and I hope he has learned his lessons from it.

Edit: Oops, I missed him forgiving her cheating the first time. He definitely stood on a landmine there. Maybe he naively trusted her and that marriage counselling would be effective, but either way, it is a pretty brutal lesson.

[-] ozaku7 9 Points 10 months ago

Maybe he was a pathetic excuse of a man who has nothing to offer but money. That's the losers that women cheat on most likely. This sub has also taught me to judge the value by women not by looks but by what else they have to offer besides looks and sex. When you do that you notice how plain and boring most women are, yet they get along with some rich guy who has nothing to offer but money.

[-] the_mountains1985 10 Points 10 months ago

This is what I was thinking. He didnt know how to have sex with his wife but she thought she could settle for comfort.

[-] Unboundaries 8 Points 10 months ago

This is absolutely correct. The OP picked a trash woman expecting her to be some perfect wife. He allowed himself to be fooled by tits and ass. He ignored her shit character that she's likely shown for years.

[-] nrafield 3 Points 10 months ago

They were together for 10 years and nothing was wrong though.

[-] ozaku7 9 Points 10 months ago

That's what you read. Have you lived with them?

[-] AllahHatesFags 9 Points 10 months ago

Women don't just go from monogamous to getting spit roasted in her husband's bed while he's away; she had to climb a ladder of dicks to get to that point.

[-] nrafield 1 Point 10 months ago

If according to the RP theory, women can stop being hypergamous and settle for a beta when they get older, I don't see why it couldn't happen the other way around. There are stories of previously stuck up women from another country starting to slut it up after moving to USA too.

[-] XenoMall 0 Points 10 months ago

that's not true. anything could have happened. she could have a brain tumour, a virus, a brain infection, brain parasite, traumatic event, Tick-borne encephalitis, chemical pollution, anything. just read up on the medical literature, and the psychiatric literature, there are so many triggers for behavior changes without having had to ride dicks in tha past.

[-] [deleted] 10 months ago
[-] [deleted] 3 Points 10 months ago

A woman that has this life and then blows it up to get gangbanged is likely crazy/cluster b disordered to an above average extent. Yes, there would be red flags.

[-] truedemocracy3 2 Points 10 months ago

Optometrist though so she has a brain and could provide for herself. I agree there were probably flags this guy was ignoring

[-] [deleted] 10 months ago
[-] TriggeringEveryone 1 Point 10 months ago

then getting railed by two chads the next.

It was probably a couple of black dudes. Chad isn't going to drive with his buddy over to a woman's house for a devil's threesome.

[-] jetspeed_ 1 Point 10 months ago

You can tell he’s a bitch because he sees two men in his house plowing his wife and he goes to the basement to pour himself a drink. If I was up there I would have finished before leaving.

[-] [deleted] 10 months ago
[-] vorverk 1 Point 10 months ago

Did you read the thing? He was talking about seing the signals early 2015, then it just escalated. It happened in the span of couple of years, not over night.

[-] [deleted] 10 months ago
[-] okuli 211 Points 10 months ago

That's exactly my story, we both had six-figure salaries, life was good until it wasn't. One of the biggest regrets is that my son won't grow up in a full family. My 5yo son became depressed and emotionally unstable: without a reason he would become angry, biting, hitting, have to go to therapy because of breakup. She ruined my life and my son't life just because she couldn't control her pussy.

In no-fault state her cheating doesn't matter AT ALL.

Write a letter like you wrote this post, and hand it out /read it out loud at court. You deserve the kids and I'm sure you're a great dad. You can do this.

I've been to court twice this year, they don't do drama there.

[-] blownnnn 150 Points 10 months ago

It's acceptable for women to cheat now. Watch all these new drama and romance movies. Women are always cheating and being forgiven for the name of love. Girls grow up thinking its OK behaviour. They are flawed and unfortunately can be easily manipulated. If men had more values and principles this shit wouldn't happen, but men are flawed too and wanna fuck a random person over, cause it's cool to. That's our society now, and it's a damn shame.

[-] Pastelitomaracucho 26 Points 10 months ago

I don't know man. We men have been openly showing the stereotype that is a "man thing" to have mistresses on the side and that your wife must put up with it for decades. When dudes want to have several women at once or are caught cheating, "It's a man thing" is one of the excuses that are used.

Girls are growing thinking they can get away with it because they have the benefit of the doubt because they actually have it. They are doing nothing but to take advange of the conditions society has offered them, as men do when given the chance.

And yes, the sexual liberation of women led to more sex for everyone and less stability in formal relationships. You are given the choice to play for the winning team, and that is why this sub exists.

[-] hammerhearth 11 Points 10 months ago

Men risk way more by cheating while in relationships.

If I, as a man, cheat on my wife, she will take my house, car, kids, child support payments, and indefinite alimony payments. If my sexual market value were sky high I could play a "live with it baby" and hope for the best just like a high value man would do with his mistresses.

If I, as a woman, cheat on my husband, the law will permit me to take his house, car, kids, child support payments, and indefinite alimony payments given I call the police after bruising up my forearms a little.

See the problem? Courts are designed to protect women at all costs, and as u/blownnnn says, its becoming socially acceptable for women to cheat.

[-] Pastelitomaracucho 8 Points 10 months ago

That is a very recent phenomenon. One or two generations ago a woman depending on a husband would have ended up starving in the streets if she cheated. Of course the scale has been horribly tipped out of balance in favour for women.

And I can agree with you cheating is becoming more socially acceptable for women.

[-] hammerhearth 1 Point 10 months ago

Yup. Ever since the sexual revolution we've gone from the nuclear one man per woman system to the 80/20 system. Without an external threat (read barbarians at the gate) our society will remain highly individualistic - our children will be raised by the government.

We're essentially re-entering the tribal system of the pre-Mesopotamia era.

[-] Pastelitomaracucho 2 Points 10 months ago

And that is why this place exists.

[-] hammerhearth 2 Points 10 months ago

May your alpha produce you many fucks, and your beta many bucks, my friend.

[-] blownnnn 3 Points 10 months ago

Exactly, women are INCENTIVIZED & manipulated to cheat in western society and there is a lot of powerful people who want to keep it this way because of $$$$.

They are actually pushing the limits by sponsoring movements like #metoo and public displays of victimization to get more women to do this. Social media and memes are tools being used to enslave, destroy and control victimized men. At the same time, silencing any men movements and rallies against it. This is the extreme left I never knew existed. It's quite shocking.

That's why I think it's irrational to just call incel or MGTOW losers. They are men choosing to not participate in this system that threatens their livelihood and incentivizes women into hurting men. It's completely rational.

[-] hammerhearth 2 Points 10 months ago

Not marrying and foregoing children is also rational but unlike the MGTOWs we have to know where to drawn the line.

The true man wants two things: danger and play. For that reason he wants woman, as the most dangerous plaything.

Yes, there are dangers involving yourself with women, but the risks (barring marriage and children) are well worth it.

[-] blownnnn 3 Points 10 months ago

It's not worth it, as we see the multiple stories on this board. Marriage is a complete gamble. Women are now only good for sex but that is basically it. They aren't good mothers because they work, and aren't good partners because they are manipulated to seek something better or cheat and they get no punishment for it.

My point is that men should not be so fragmented and unify as a group so issues can be discussed and heard. By having us divided they can attack and exploit each group's weaknesses. Instead of addressing that men are increasingly becoming victims of emotional abuse and traumatic relationships behind closed doors.

[-] [deleted] 10 months ago
[-] SovereignSoul76 9 Points 10 months ago

"And yes, the sexual liberation of women led to more sex for everyone"

That's like saying "The 2008 bailout led to more money for everyone".

[-] Pastelitomaracucho 2 Points 10 months ago

Well, it certainly did!. Our grandparents and grandparents in many places had to marry to get laid. Today we have Tinder. Our parents actually got laid more than any other generation and now we are starting to see the new generations having less sex and intimacy, but still miles ahead from the conservative societies of the past.

Keep in mind that the sexual liberation of women is a 60-year old phenomenon, not something that happened 5 years ago when Instagram sluts flourished.

[-] Chaddeus_Rex 1 Point 10 months ago

Which conservative societies? The only societies that had issues with sex where christian ones - not pagans, not jews, not zoroastrians.

[-] Pastelitomaracucho 1 Point 10 months ago

In our western context, the conservative societies have been mostly Catholic and Christian as you said.

[-] Chaddeus_Rex 1 Point 10 months ago

The more i read and learn about Christianity the more I become convinced it has been a net negative for our society and harmed us more than it helped.

[-] Pastelitomaracucho 1 Point 10 months ago

I can agree. Catholicism was a powerful repression tool for everyone for centuries. Not to wonder why people stand up fiercely against it given the opportunity, and than includes women liberating themselves.

[-] Chaddeus_Rex 1 Point 10 months ago

Women did not need to liverate themselves for there was nothing to liberate.

[-] [deleted] 10 months ago
[-] 189econs 1 Point 10 months ago

We don't have tinder thanks to crazy hippie bitches, and if the numbers from that app are true then the "revolution" has been a downgrade for 80% of the men out there who are now considered too subpar for even the lowest of women.

we are starting to see the new generations having less sex and intimacy

Now generations of men, women today are sluttier than the previous generations by an order of magnitude. There was no instagram in the 1980's.

[-] blownnnn 9 Points 10 months ago

You raise valid points. Each of us as men have to a choice: to evolve humanity or devolve it. We ultimately lead the way in how our society will become.

That's why I don't mess around with attached women at all. This behaviour is destroying families, destroying men, raising weaker BETA men and it leads to an overall weaker society.

Men need to reject women who do this behavior, because it is just making more frustrated men that end up lashing out to society. Look at schools today, people are getting shot up like it's a normal thing. There is probably more hurtful things going on in schools today that nobody talks about.

Women need to learn how to be honest and vulnerable to men if they want to be leaders, not continue to champion women who emotionally destroy men.

[-] Pastelitomaracucho 7 Points 10 months ago

It's a very complex issue and the truth is, we just do not know how to deal with it as a society. Not even psychologists, sociologists and similar professionals know how tackle the societal changes of our time.

The facts are that: 1) kids without a father figure do much worse in life than kids that manage to remain in a stable family. 2) Inequality increases violence among men. And by inequality I mean not only economic inequality, but everything else that spans from that, including have a small % of successful men at the top and the vast majorty of losers at the bottom, feeling they have nothing to lose. 3) Sexual liberation of women has made them extra selective, leading to the 20%-80% distributions we talk about here so much.

So you have a generation of young guys that never had a father figure, never learned how a man interacts with a woman in a loving way (so many guys here telling us chilling divorce rape stories), never had parenting time because mom is always at work and on top of that they seeing an increasingly reduce number of successful guys girls just fight over for. Of course these man tend to think the world is unfair. Of course they tend to think that it would be so much better if opportunities could even out a bit.

And of course women act the way they act, come on. They do it because they can and they also do it because they are trapped in their own societal expectations. However, they do have choice. Which we men don't.

At the moment it seems that this all leads to more unhappiness. And I have no way to tell if the current trend of men opting out of life will actually make them happy in the long run or if women will be happy in the future with the idea that men "worthy" enough for themare just going to become scarcer and scarcer.

[-] 189econs 1 Point 10 months ago

so many guys here telling us chilling divorce rape stories

Why would anyone with a perfect marriage bother coming here? and if they did what advice would they give us besides biased facts from his personal (practically accidental if we look at statistics) success?

And I have no way to tell if the current trend of men opting out of life will actually make them happy in the long run

Eh, it might make them less unhappy than the divorced men committing suicide

An improvement is still an improvement

[-] Pastelitomaracucho 1 Point 10 months ago

Because people with perfect marriages don't leave in a bubble. If they are lucky to be on a perfect marriage, they will still see friends, relatives and others going through marriage hell. If you are smart enough to think that you might be one among the lucky ones and that shit could rain on you one day, you might end up here.

Any personal account is a biased fact. That includes the good accounts and the bad accounts. Any advice based on experience, regardless whether the experience is good or bad, must be taken critically.

And each side can offer valid advice. Guys in successful marriages may be doing something different. Guys in bad marriages will tell you what not to do, or how to proceed legally. And both sides can be wrong.

The only information that has less bias (hopefully) is scientific literature and of course the letter of law, which is what it is. From these two sources of information when can place lines of action to avoid getting fucked.

[-] 189econs 1 Point 10 months ago

they will still see friends, relatives and others going through marriage hell

Yeah but they pretend its something "that happens", or that the problem is them and not something systemic. They think they are the average and not the minority.

Guys in successful marriages may be doing something different.

YMMV, but if you look at numbers its more likely that they got a better chance than most.

From these two sources of information when can place lines of action to avoid getting fucked.

Well given that these days even LTR can be considered marriage by courts and a judge can throw away a prenup like nothing I say the only way to avoid getting fucked is to change the system. They are already closing the few loopholes that we had.

[-] XenoMall 1 Point 10 months ago

It's not a complex issue. Cheating is wrong.

[-] 189econs 1 Point 10 months ago

While I agree with your statement the reality is that men being starved for sex due to the SMP deeming 80% of them undesirable in turns makes them desperate to get any, so they don't care about going for a married broad. A good analogy would be telling a hungry guy to not steal any food since that makes crime go up and he should instead starve with dignity.

[-] blownnnn 1 Point 10 months ago

Sex is not life or death. You've been institutionalized to think this. Sex addiction is a real thing. If you think that life is all about fucking, then go to a developing country where sex is not even a big issue and is easily attainable. Your perspective on life changes greatly.

You realize a man's life is about purpose and meaning in their communities, basically the fundamentals of what TRP is about. Woman at their core, need guidance and protection, something that western institutions can provide them better than a man now + with benefits. So more women disrespect men because they don't need them.

[-] 189econs 1 Point 10 months ago

Now you're being ignorant, most developing countries are far more tradcon than the west and unless you go straight for whores then you're going to have it harder.

You're living in LaLa-land if you think the average male out there is going to be all stoic and not cheat because "society", you need to get out more and talk to 99% of people who aren't part of our movement.

[-] blownnnn 1 Point 10 months ago

I'm well travelled, most women are open sexually. West takes sex more "serious" because the implications of having a kid, marriage, health, career, and social status.

It's just plain stupid to cheat in the west, your giving the ammunition for a woman to destroy your reputation, career, and SMV. Might as well give them a gun too. Not many men can rebuild themselves after the onslaught.

There is no "average" male. Your either weak with principles or strong. Your just helping the people with an agenda build a more difficult world for men.

In the end, your just gonna end up hurting your own livelihood just to "fit-in", people who are willing to fit-in are the first ones sent to die in war or get sent to the BBQ chamber to fit-in.

[-] Chaddeus_Rex 1 Point 10 months ago

This behaviour is destroying families, destroying men, raising weaker BETA men and it leads to an overall weaker society.

Who cares? You cant change anything until either men grow a backbone collectivy or it benefits those in power (plus monogmay is unnatural and unhealthy) tp change

[-] calamalakos 1 Point 10 months ago

The thing though, and maybe it's because I'm italian but I've found that regardless of my cheating I still have found I was able to really love and care for the women I was with.

The cheating wasn't with someone I wanted more, just new pussy.

Where I find for women, they don't cheat the same, like, they'd rather be with that new guy more than the one they are currently with.

[-] blownnnn 2 Points 10 months ago

Is it love if you are willing to sacrifice it for a fleeting moment? I'm not judging, just gotta answer that for yourself. Choices are contribution to humanity. That woman you cheated with is going to feel "empowered" because she hurt another woman, and used you. The fact she was able to make a man risk everything for her, is a huge emotional ego boost because she's currently unloved. That's why certain girls will target married men or men in successful relationships.

When women decide to cheat it's not only because of physical sex, it's because of a lack of spiritual intimacy. There's a disconnect in the connection, and she senses/needs that. Women cheat because they need a strong spirit in the relationship (mind, body, soul).

[-] calamalakos 1 Point 10 months ago

Ya, definitely. I wouldn't consider it a sacrifice because I wouldn't get caught.

I don't think it's cool to cheat in the same city, out of respect for the girl I'm with. I think it'd be really lame for me to walk into a place with her and then some other chicks are like, omg, I slept with that guy, I can't believe he has a girlfriend. Not because I care, but I wouldn't want to hurt her feelings; have other women look down at her.

If I fuck around, I take the "guilt", I've also set up boundaries, like, no sleep overs, because it's the emotional cheating that I can't fucking stand.

You've got a best guy friend I'm assuming? Do you think you care less about your best friend because you choose to hang out with another friend?

If someone said to me, "you only get one 'best friend' to spend the rest of your life with" whenever you want to do something fun, it'd to be with him. Travel? Him. Hang out a have a drink? Him. Discuss a problem? Him. Nah.

Maybe my opinion will change if I choose to have a child, but for now, this is how I think.

[-] Chaddeus_Rex 1 Point 10 months ago

The difference being men naturally want to be polygamous - its in our biology. Women want to be monogamous and its only society that teaches them its bad that a man "cheats" and jealousy (penis envy) that tells her she should be able to do what a man does in ignorance of her biology. It wont make her happy though.

[-] Pastelitomaracucho 1 Point 10 months ago

You are going to provide a source for the claim that men are polygamus and women aren't.

There is plenty of scientific literature suggesting that humans are genetically predisposed to polygamy and that the push for monogamy had only been happening in the past 1000 years in only A FEW societies, including ours. One must look at other mammals, primates and apes to realise that yeah, we are likely polygamus as well, but you can dig further into that.

Both men and women cheat. The social consequences for women cheating have relaxed and the same consequences for men have hardened. But both sexes are programmed to cheat.

Then of course, women mate with peers at or above their level. Men do it at any level. And of course, females are the gatekeepers of sex and we are just a bunch of thirsty fucks.

What's more, the alpha / beta analogy can be applied -more of less- to both genders. What for the woman is let's say, having a beta provider as she mated with males with superior genetic quality, the same applies for the aging, fattening wife which dreads his husband getting to know the new young secretary that just joined the team. It's almost exactly the same thing.

[-] Chaddeus_Rex 1 Point 10 months ago

You can always do your own research and be surprised and astounded by what you learn but since im nice ill help you get started

[-] Pastelitomaracucho 1 Point 10 months ago

Your article says absolutely nothing about monogamy or polygamy so I do not know how it contributes to the debate at hand.

Your article says that researchers found a genetic bottleneck 8000 years ago during the advent of agriculture. That's it. Hypothesis of why that happened are not confirmed and one of them suggest that maybe a few wealthy men amassed most of the women - something we see today. What does that have to do with monogamy of poligamy?

[-] Chaddeus_Rex 1 Point 10 months ago

It absolutely does. If there was 17:1 females:males ratio that implies that one man had 17 women and one woman had 1 man. Capiche?

[-] Pastelitomaracucho 1 Point 10 months ago

The 17:1 ratio ONLY implies that 17 women reproduced for each male that managed to do so. That's it.

Females in that case could have been switching from successful male to successful male every time and the ratio will still be the same because it's the same number of players playing the game. The data has no way of telling you if one woman was sticking to one man or if she was jumping from successful man to successful man. This is exactly what is happening today by the way: successful males simply get "recycled" while losers never stand a chance. Women prefer a successful man with kids than a single loser. And this is showing up in research.

So again, sorry, but you did not understand the article well and thus it is not bringing anything to the discussion.

[-] Chaddeus_Rex 1 Point 10 months ago

What you wrote supports my arguments. If men got recycled by most women, the point remains that men were polygamous whereas women were monigamous until they monkey branched.

There is also mitochondrial evidence for this where men have a greater mutochondrial variation in their genome then they do in their y chromosomes. Since mitochondria is passed from mother to offspring and y chromosome is from father to son only, then more variation in mitochondria implies more female ancestors and less variation in y chromsomes imploes fewer male ancestors implying polygamy. I am too lazy to look for the link rn. See if you can find it.

[-] Pastelitomaracucho 1 Point 10 months ago

The 17:1 ratio ONLY implies that 17 women reproduced for each male that managed to do so. That's it.

Females in that case could have been switching from successful male to successful male every time and the ratio will still be the same because it's the same number of players playing the game. The data has no way of telling you if one woman was sticking to one man or if she was jumping from successful man to successful man. This is exactly what is happening today by the way: successful males simply get "recycled" while losers never stand a chance. Women prefer a successful man with kids than a single loser. And this is showing up in research.

So again, sorry, but you did not understand the article well and thus it is not bringing anything to the discussion.

[-] 08Winchester 1 Point 10 months ago

Here’s a question: any guy here stuck with a wife that cheated, went googlistic, found the red pill, then kept the marriage going with newfound RP insight?

[-] 189econs 0 Points 10 months ago

We men have been openly showing the stereotype that is a "man thing" to have mistresses on the side

60 years ago maybe

When dudes want to have several women at once or are caught cheating, "It's a man thing" is one of the excuses that are used.

Again grandpa that's not the case anymore, dudes who get caught are shamed publically for it

Not women tho, its the man's fault she's cheating on her for not living up to her unknown standards she forgot to mention to him before jumping on a random dick.

the sexual liberation of women led to more sex for everyone

How high you were when you wrote this?

[-] Pastelitomaracucho 1 Point 10 months ago

If you can't look further than a decade in the past, you are missing a lot of information that helps understand the current state of affairs. Read the posts within its context: the evolution of things to the point as they are today is the result of more than sixty years of social change.

This shit didn't come with Tinder

[-] 189econs 0 Points 10 months ago

Yeah but you talk about things like mistresses as if that was happening now and thats not even remotely the case.

[-] [deleted] 10 months ago
[-] pmmedenver 46 Points 10 months ago

My family divorced when I was 12 and my neglectful father was replaced with a tyrannical narcissist. I was bullied all through middle school and most of high school. These days I'm a founding member of a successful software company at 27. I still have fear talking to people, trust issues, and always assume the worst, but the human spirit is strong enough to overcome, given the right attitude (stay humble, always be growing).

[-] [deleted] 9 months ago
[-] Minopo 0 Points 10 months ago

s here telling us chi

You make your own path not others.. Always remember this and forget the evil others had done to you.

[-] ex_addict_bro -1 Point 10 months ago

Stfu, lift, swallow the bitter truth. No other way.

I may sound harsh but please note I took my hours at ACA meetings. Victim mentality is strong but you can cure it.

Stay strong brother.

[-] Buchloe 3 Points 10 months ago

I just read an article saying a stable, loving family during the years up to age six is pretty critical to a child growing up to be a confident, stable adult. Very sorry that at no doing of your own your child/ children may suffer.

[-] [deleted] 10 months ago
[-] 189econs 1 Point 10 months ago

This, is like guys thinking a prenup solves everything: newsflash it doesnt

Any shitty judge out there can take your prenup and declare it invalid if wifey says she was "under pressure" when signing it.

What "under pressure" means? well if you said if you didnt want to marry then thats considered unfair pressure on her. You get that? looking out for your basic rights is now considered to be undue pressure on a woman despite the insane divorce rates we're seeing.

TLDR: prenups don't do shit either, you have more chances of winning the lottery than getting the kids and not paying alimony

[-] ozaku7 -1 Point 10 months ago

If she could control her pussy she would make it tingle for you. Not her fault you left her so sexually frustrated that she destroyed the relationship over it.

[-] TopNotch_Fuckery 158 Points 10 months ago

Men just need to have this shit drilled into their heads over and over until it sticks. We get a new crop of horror stories like this every week, and so many people still manage to think it won't happen to them. If you're married, or in an LTR, you need to appreciate that you could be fucking next.

[-] I_am_Jax_account 32 Points 10 months ago

Yeah because we (and I am including myself in this) think "well she said she loves me forever so, duh, we are going to stay together" and never truly, internally, consider the possibility of her changing her mind at any instant and having society back up her every impulse whim.

[-] drty_pr 1 Point 10 months ago

Once I accepted and fully internalized AWALT, my life and by extension my marriage, became so much easier. I think on some instinctual level she knows that I view it like this too.

[-] Low_Cost_Chimp_Meat 20 Points 10 months ago

Yes, it happened to me and I was thoroughly red-pilled throughout my marriage.....just don't fucking get married!!!

[-] OneRedSock 14 Points 10 months ago

You will be fucking next. It's AWALT.

The biggest irony I see consistently on TRP are the men who think that because they are Red Pilled, and think they are using every RP trick in the book 100% effectively (they aren't), that they will maintain a marriage or relationship without the woman stepping out. They laugh at "BP Cucks", whose girlfriends or wives they fuck, but think they're somehow immune to the potentiality due to their understanding of RP or because their girl comes from a good, old fashioned family dynamic with a strong father figure, etc. But that's just BP mentality in a RP wrapper: they're still hoping for a unicorn, just using a different toolset.

AWALT is a fact. Simply because a woman steps out of the marriage does not intrinsically mean the man was BP. He could have been the most RP guy, and she simply followed her emotions, and hamstered her way into thinking some other guy is the true love of her life or some such bullshit due to the novelty of it or because she's hormonal. Despite all the red flags we use to spot low quality women, despite all the RP techniques we utilize to ensure they maintain tingles long enough, there comes a point when you have to accept there is only so much you can do to control your life, and a woman is not one of those things.

Fuck 'em. Enjoy 'em. But no one here should be assuming that they're above any of the bullshit that the "BP cucks" suffer; women are just like that. They love until they don't. You can mitigate the decline in their attraction to you, but at some point women are children. And children get bored.

[-] Celicni 2 Points 10 months ago

Saying will is going a bit overboard, don't you think? All women definitely CAN cheat for no reason but not all will.

I'm still not advocating marriage, because it's playing Russian roulette with a 50% chance of blowing your brains out, and that's why we say never marry, because a 50% chance isn't worth it for the minor benefits you get, but that gun won't go off 100% of the time.

[-] The__Tren__Train 1 Point 10 months ago

who hurt you?

just make sure you vet her bro... just marry the right girl

/s

[-] HeyYouWhoM3 1 Point 10 months ago

She’s not yours, it’s just your turn. Words to live by

[-] CP9ANZ 1 Point 10 months ago

My friends been in this trap for 8 years, she basically forced the marriage, then was getting roasted within 3 months of the wedding. He let it go, she's a complete cunt, Has him trapped via the marriage saviour child.

[-] TheDevilsAdvokaat 125 Points 10 months ago

You cannot buy love, you can only buy sex.

If you have to buy a woman's favour, then she doesn't favour you at all. The moment you start paying to retain a woman it means you've already lost her; because if she was really yours she'd stick around without having to be bought.

You cannot force a woman to be faithful; you cannot police her; you have to rely on her to do it because she has to do it when you're not around.

Also, I think you're wrong about the Tesla. It wasn't that it made him look like a subservient provider; it made her look like a well off, successful woman; which made her attract more male attention...which led to her fucking around.

If you elevate a woman, expect her to attract attention from a better class of men...at which time she may decide you are no longer good enough for her.

If you put her on a pedestal don't be surprised if she starts to think she is better than you - after all you seem to think so.

[-] rahl_r 35 Points 10 months ago

If you elevate a woman, expect her to attract attention from a better class of men...at which time she may decide you are no longer good enough for her.

"Your services are no longer required", cutthroat mercenary style.

You said it. Such woman creature is some professional social hierarchy climber^TM right there. Some top notch hypocrisy to it.

[-] trees_away 26 Points 10 months ago

Exactly what happened to me when I sunk $8k into my soon to be ex wife’s breasts. She suddenly started getting more attention and decided she was better than me. I used my bonus two years in a row to do what SHE wanted.... Even though I was fine with her tits the way they were.

Fortunately, they look like Frankenstein’s monster and she won’t be able to afford to get them fixed on the $3400 a month she’s getting from me until she finds another beta shmuck to marry. Good luck with the wall sweetheart. Hope it breaks your nose.

I on the other hand just had a threesome tonight with a 21-yo and 22-yo models and life is grand. I love being divorced. ????

(For anyone who saw my field report last month about the 21-yo model, she’s become my bottom bitch, and actively pursues other women for me to bed. She brought her best friend over tonight for us to fuck, even though I’ve explicitly told her repeatedly that I’m not interested in exclusivity or labels but as long as she doesn’t bore me I’ll keep her around. Holy shit, I can’t believe that works.)

[-] TheDevilsAdvokaat 21 Points 10 months ago

And happened to my brother too. He met a poor girl, bought her nice clothes and gave her a new life; she then met a different class of men and left to marry one....who turned out to be only pretending to be better off than my bro and married her, got her pregnant then left her...after which she tried to come back to my brother (I already warned him this would happen) but thankfully he had the guts to say no...

Ah women......good to hear you are doing ok, so is my brother...

[-] Unboundaries 8 Points 10 months ago

Lmaoooooooo "Even though I was fine with her tits the way they were."

I could just imagine the arguments.

[-] trees_away 2 Points 10 months ago

Yea, especially since I was WAY BP still and the bitch got what the bitch wanted... “Happy wife, happy life” right? ????

[-] Hulegu2 4 Points 10 months ago

I keep hitting the star button like a lab rat rewarded with crack, but I can only give you one point.

[-] [deleted] 10 months ago
[-] magx01 -1 Point 10 months ago

Thanks for the pointless bragging (if it's even true) that adds nothing to the conversation.

[-] trees_away 3 Points 10 months ago

Boasting? Sure, a little. Pointless? Not really. I was contrasting my soon to be post-wall (at 34 and with two kids she would be already if it wasn’t for good genes) ex-wife’s life with the amazingness of being on a RP journey as a newly single late 30’s man. I have it made, much of which is thanks to TRP.

[-] lorum_ipsum_dolor 9 Points 10 months ago

Also, I think you're wrong about the Tesla. It wasn't that it made him look like a subservient provider; it made her look like a well off, successful woman; which made her attract more male attention...which led to her fucking around.

I disagree. Men don't give two shits apart from "Is she hot?". The only "success" she had was being genetically gifted. All the trappings of wealth and status were just background noise to this woman's hypergamy. There was no dread, no withholding of attention or resources, no consequences, no nothing. She knew she had nothing to lose.

[-] bonkai420 2 Points 10 months ago

He should have gotten her a toyota corolla lol

[-] MattyAnon 8 Points 10 months ago

Also, I think you're wrong about the Tesla. It wasn't that it made him look like a subservient provider; it made her look like a well off, successful woman; which made her attract more male attention...which led to her fucking around.

Either the Tesla was a coincidence or it triggered feelings of guilt because she's already cheating.

Buying your wife expensive gifts is pointless - she already owns you and everything you earn. The only gift was your life, and you've already given it to her so there is no further benefit. Buying her anything else is just spending her money on her.

[-] [deleted] 10 months ago
[-] yaxis50 3 Points 10 months ago

You dropped way too much knowledge in this post.

[-] [deleted] 10 months ago
[-] jethreezy 2 Points 10 months ago

If you elevate a woman, expect her to attract attention from a better class of men...at which time she may decide you are no longer good enough for her.

A nice corollary to Briffault's Law.

[-] Wrath_of_Trump 64 Points 10 months ago

You can't buy inner game, that's where all the value is. When you can walk up to any girl and her face lights up, that's more powerful than pulling up in a McLaren.

[-] Gozsayin2 11 Points 10 months ago

Not necessarily. I would say inner game is how u keep them around but a nice car is all you need to get in the door. If your carless in America like me some women just don't want anything to do with you game or not

[-] Sparky159 1 Point 10 months ago

Game or not

If you got good game and know how to talk to women, you don't need a car. You'll have them coming to you

[-] Reformed65 60 Points 10 months ago

To add to OP's message, I grew up in a family where they I had to earn my rights and freedom, I grew with people who often didn't appreciate my favours towards them, I saw how society would give to groups such as SJWs a hand, and they'll take the arm.

One of the most prominent message I've learnt in my life, is that once you start giving, the next gift has to be better, and the next has to be even better and so on. People always want more, and they want better value than what you gave them previously. Once you start giving, they're going to expect you to give the next time. Many times, I've helped people halfway though, I'd give them a hand, but I have my limits, I say "sorry, that's all I can do. I have to go" and they'd often be unappreciative of that, they go "come on man, just this once" but it's not "just this once", continue helping and you'll get about 5x "come on man, it's the last one. Just one more to go."

In regards to relationships, you mustn't give gifts that make your partner more "independent" because in this day and age, her "independence" doesn't make you more powerful. It's not like business partners, where if your partner was more independent from his boss, than he could sign that one deal with you but "sorry man, the boss has tied my hands, he doesn't agree with your terms". No, this is "your" girl, the more you give her, the more trouble she'll cause. It sounds fucked up, I'm not telling you to lock her in the house, I'm not telling you to take her phone away, I'm telling you to ensure that you invest in "your" girl in the right direction, invest her towards yourself, not towards making her a more "independent wymn".

[-] rahl_r 15 Points 10 months ago

I'm telling you to ensure that you invest in "your" girl in the right direction, invest her towards yourself

... which is? Can you please give some concrete examples and/or explain how this plays out in practice? It is just that I seem unable to wrap my dinosaur brain around the concept.

[-] Rich77u 12 Points 10 months ago

I'm thinking maybe instead of a car than simply expands her freedom, maybe a vacation for two, or a couple's activity. Maybe some home improvements, or cooking dinner together. Basically anything that ultimately includes or involves you at some level. In the case of a car, the only instance he's involved is signing the check.

With the vacation or the house, it's something the two can both enjoy and would ideally draw each other closer.

[-] 3d_truth 3 Points 10 months ago

It's the first N in the DENNIS system. Nurture dependence.

[-] rockmasterflex 2 Points 10 months ago

Don't share your finances, own everything important in your life YOURSELF, pay for your half of the vacations and expect her to pay her own, for the privilege of going with you.

Thats what dependent independence looks like.

[-] [deleted] 10 months ago
[-] Archterus 8 Points 10 months ago

The old 2/3 rd rule applies. They give you x, you reciprocate with something 2/3rds of that magnitude. Keep them mean, keep them hungry.

[-] The__Tren__Train 56 Points 10 months ago

he's sad for her..

he should be sad for himself.. he's going to lose everything, and he'll be lucky to see his kids every other Thursday afternoon.

never marry

[-] Trp2166 1 Point 9 months ago

Don’t know about that. Cheating and being distant is usually enough for the court to side against you, especially if the kids testify.

[-] [deleted] 10 months ago
[-] [deleted] 10 months ago
[-] jaxmomplayer 54 Points 10 months ago

Having an orgy with randos when he’s gone was my first guess!

[-] Martysteiner 1 Point 10 months ago

I was expecting a golden shower, but eh.

[-] 420KUSHBUSH 52 Points 10 months ago

Any women that does that to her children, neglecting them, is not marriage material and is a shit human being. Granted most people are scum but this level is in the minority. Pretty sure you're just using an extreme case

Also

She tried to pull the "what-about-the-kids" bullshit, but I was just done

I'm not sure if she said this out of manipulation or lack of self awareness and I don't know which one should worry me more

[-] The__Tren__Train 41 Points 10 months ago

marriage material

marriage is a transfer of wealth from the man to the woman. there is no such thing as 'marriage material'.

[-] Archterus 6 Points 10 months ago

Yes, the 'material' is exactly that, the assets!

[-] 420KUSHBUSH 6 Points 10 months ago

It's a relative term. I'd rather be stuck with someone I can tolerate and aren't completely repulsed by rather than someone meeting all those criterias

[-] The__Tren__Train 12 Points 10 months ago

you should never be 'stuck' with someone.

always have the ability to walk away.

[-] 420KUSHBUSH 5 Points 10 months ago

I'm not saying I don't. If someone wants to marry, none of my business, personally not my thing though. I can acknowledge, despite my view against marriage, which girls are better suited to marry than others. That is all

[-] Satou4 2 Points 10 months ago

Which girls are better suited to take your money, you mean.

[-] Freedom2speech 1 Point 10 months ago

There are some better suited. Usually conservative one man women that want kids and family.

[-] [deleted] 10 months ago
[-] pseudonym42 25 Points 10 months ago

I am thinking you are new here. AWALT.

[-] pugh88 -2 Point 10 months ago

There is still a spectrum. Otherwise why would we use the term "red flags"?

[-] Your_Coke_Dealer 4 Points 10 months ago

AWALT is a proclivity, not a scenario. All women have the potential at any time to act on their hypergamous urges and do something shitty for a new alpha-male infatuation. Doesn’t matter if she’s a “good girl”, a virgin, a massive ho, a “reformed” ho, your FWB, your wife, or whether you’re some Adonis-looking perfect specimen or a fat slob. Women will seek out someone who in the particular moment is attractive to them, and then you will learn that she is not your girl, it is just your turn. Your frame will not be perfect 100%, or your girl will find “Mr. Right Now”, or any number of things may happen, but the point is, ALL women are like that with this tendency. It always can happen with any woman, even if it has not happened with a particular one you speak of

[-] pugh88 -4 Point 10 months ago

And you don't think the proclivity is stronger within some women than it is with others?

[-] heartbroken_nerd 5 Points 10 months ago

Oh, how nice. You're bringing up a classic purple pill argument.

To which I can only say the following:

When it comes to guns, you should absolutely treat every gun as if it is loaded and ready to fire. Every single one. No exceptions to this rule, lest you hurt yourself or someone in your close vicinity. Or both.

You ought to treat women like you treat guns. Assume the danger and remain vigilant, otherwise you risk hurting yourself and/or other people unintentionally.

Every gun and every woman has equal potential to fuck your life up one way or another. Take risks in life but don't be retarded about it.

Nobody has the power to stop you from playing with fire, but we sure as hell will warn you about it.

[-] pugh88 -7 Point 10 months ago

How things are is one thing. How we should act is another.

[-] Your_Coke_Dealer 1 Point 10 months ago

You

[-] Dmva100 19 Points 10 months ago

Women will always weaponize their children.

Children are the 3rd leg of hypergamy; she needs them to be dependent on her unconditional love so she isn't all alone while pooping her Tena pads in the nursing home. Their kids are an extension of betabux in the form of comfort.

[-] donkey_democrat 12 Points 10 months ago

Women do have genuine love for their kids due to the strong Oxycotin-created connection.

[-] SeemedGood 5 Points 10 months ago

Not so, particularly with modern drugged births and C-sections. True children typically present the first opportunity for women to outgrow solipsism and learn how to actually love others but women steeped in modern western culture are typically eschewing this opportunity these days.

[-] Garathon 7 Points 10 months ago

Agreed, my wife didn't give a fuck about her kids when she started avoiding seeing them in order to cheat.

[-] sadomasochrist 1 Point 10 months ago

She loves herself more, hence Tingles Uber Alles.

[-] replicaplater 4 Points 10 months ago

While you might be right in the pure ethical sense that she is trash its still not going to help the poor bastard or anyone else who stepped on this kind of landmine. This post just highlights that even when you think you have your life together, one false step and it can come crashing down.

[-] 420KUSHBUSH 2 Points 10 months ago

That point goes without saying though

[-] aegrisomnia21 1 Point 10 months ago

A-fucking-men! Especially when that life is built on the assumption that your SO will always be in it. Been there, done that, the new life that I built for myself is much more stable and if a woman is or isn’t in it - big fucking deal

[-] empatheticapathetic 2 Points 10 months ago

All mothers are like this and worse.

[-] showerdudes9 1 Point 10 months ago

Thats just the deathrattle cry pretty much. She knew it was over but since hed been a pussy before why not take a shot with "what about the kids"

[-] rahl_r 52 Points 10 months ago

and finding not one, but TWO men in my bed.

Well, that's disgusting.

Two filthy strange men in his bed. Sweat, odor, and probably even cum, all rubbed into his bed. A bed that he sleeps in.

He'd have to throw away that bed and burn it to cinders. I know I would.

What about these two strange men? Don't they have any decency to see what they did? Are they going to pay for this dude's new bed once he takes the necessary step and burns the current one to cinders? What are these two to say about such situation? -- is there even anything to be said? Oh man...

[-] Rich77u 44 Points 10 months ago

Some dudes only look to bust a nut and don't care about what they leave behind.

But let's be honest. There isn't a shortage of assholes. If it wasn't them somebody else would.

[-] 3d_truth 19 Points 10 months ago

I don't blame the men at all. It's not on them. They were invited to come and have sex with a hot woman. It's her house too. If I was in their shoes I would do the same.

[-] RedwallAllratuRatbar 29 Points 10 months ago

It's interesting that we don't blame men, this is some kind of double standard. They deserve to be gunned down the street like degenerates they are. But first there would need to be precedent, because now it's accepted behaviour to fuck someone else's wife. But in "world is working as it should" sense, yes, the three of them should be hanged in public. I guarantee these behaviours would cut down by 99% in the society.

[-] 3d_truth 3 Points 10 months ago

It's not a double standard. The woman has decided she will cheat on her husband, it is her decision to make. And it is none the guys business to try and 'save their marriage' by turning down this girl who will just find someone else. She knows there are endless willing guys. The ball is completely in her court and thus 100% her responsibility.

[-] RedwallAllratuRatbar 0 Points 10 months ago

It's guys responsibility, but currently we are too deep down in the shit. If we have laws that treat marriage serious (divorce laws), how about making wives and husbands in marriage untouchable. Let's apply "sex with minors" laws and punishments to fucking people in marriage. Bam, marriage means something now

[-] 3d_truth 2 Points 10 months ago

That's just some beta mentality. Your afraid of your wife cheating so want to make it illegal for her to do so. Forget making yourself attractive and learning how to fuck her right. You really think owning your wife on paper is going to work for you?

[-] RedwallAllratuRatbar 0 Points 10 months ago

hell no, like it's some justice warrior thing, like even when I have 5 plates I keep screaming mentally how fucking unfair it is, how the system is fucked up

[-] Trp2166 1 Point 9 months ago

That’s because you’re a whiny emotional beta

[-] [deleted] 10 months ago
[-] 3d_truth 2 Points 10 months ago

Revenge? No. Would you seek revenge on a lion if it tried to eat you? The only person to blame is the wife. And maybe husband for making her want to cheat.

Blaming the guy is very beta. There are probably a billion guys who would happily replace that guy and bang the wife.

[-] LukesLikeIt 1 Point 10 months ago

Were the guys married to her husband? What do they owe a stranger

[-] Trp2166 1 Point 9 months ago

Lmao what a cringey retarded comment. It’s 100% not the guys fault. Don’t blame a nigga for trying to get a nut, blame the cheating bitch who invited them into her house.

[-] Satou4 11 Points 10 months ago

I think I would move somewhere else

[-] teeteedoubleyoudee 8 Points 10 months ago

I think paying for the bed would be the last of their intentions mate.

[-] EatGreatEvnLate 46 Points 10 months ago

"Sometimes you think you have true love, and then you catch the early flight home from.. San Diego and a couple nude people jump out of your bathroom like a goddamn magic show ready to double team your girlfriend...

Lol. Your story relates way too closely to the intro scene of Old School.

[-] [deleted] 42 Points 10 months ago

Two take aways

1 Keep your relationships short.

  1. Women change a lot after kids and it's not for the better.
[-] Low_Cost_Chimp_Meat 47 Points 10 months ago

Yes. They become "unhappy" when they get everything they want.

[-] exscionewhuman 40 Points 10 months ago

So the moral of the story is he wasn't making her pussy tingle... but she was a soldier and had average sex for like 20 years. Hamstering away things like she's in love or what about the kids when thinking of a previous chad (or possibly not knowing better, and running into one later).

I think that was one of the hardest parts of redpill to accept for me. That women will never love you like you can love them. Their love can turn off like the flip of a switch. You can never rely on them or trust in them, you can only rely on yourself. My mom chose the ultimate alpha (the dead founder of a religion) over me so you know, awalt. I appreciate the lesson now, though.

I think in the moment though, they can be extremely expressive and honest with that expression, vibrant and fun with this almost childish energy. You can trust your perspective in those moments, it's ok to be attracted to them and want them, just don't trust what they have to say about it or that it could be permanent.

That's what sucks for me, I've always been a romantic, imagining a stable and harmonious relationship for life. Real life is chaotic, dirty, and often unpleasant, unfortunately. We've all had our feelings coddled since childhood trying to make us feel better about it, I guess. Taught the disney fantasy.

[-] SKRedPill 5 Points 10 months ago

In that way they're like the opposite of my dog - once a dog loves you, he never stops loving. Well with women, if they stop loving you, it ain't coming back.

[-] [deleted] 40 Points 10 months ago

As a sidenote, isn't it hilarious & sad that the offmychest subreddit has autoban on everyone who has ever posted on this very redpill subreddit?

If you have a post on the red pill try replying or posting in the offmychest subreddit - you can't, because you're auto-banned already.

[-] MattyAnon 19 Points 10 months ago

It's important to instaban any men who wish to say anything against the pro-female narrative.

Women venting is completely fine of course.

[-] yaxis50 5 Points 10 months ago

Id trade the offmychest subreddit and a bunch of others for theredpill

[-] syf3r 1 Point 10 months ago

I had forgotten about that. When they sent me a message like a high school mean girls clique telling me I can't be in with the cool kids, I couldn't care less.

I've lived without them, I'm living without them.

[-] WhatsThePointAgainx 35 Points 10 months ago

The only mistake this guy really made was getting married. Love it how all the comments put sole responsibility for his wife being a hoe on the husband. As if women can't just be hoes because they want to be because she's a selfish twat. That's my only gripe with the redpill they still act like bluepillers as if every shit move a woman makes is some how the dudes responsibility or fault.

The dude was fucking married to her and bought her a car as part of a family asset. If that's enough excuse to be a hoe then it's the hoes fault and dude should divorce her ass imediate

[-] Low_Cost_Chimp_Meat 12 Points 10 months ago

I agree with you! The guys on here get butt-hurt when you simply tell that being "red-pill aware" or "alpha" will NOT prevent this all too often calamity from happening to them.

Marriage should be illegal.

[-] Tarkakabhai 9 Points 10 months ago

Alphas like Brad Pitt get fucked in marriages. How can lifting can make you that Alpha is beyond me. Do not get married. That is it.

[-] xx-Rain_Maker-xx 3 Points 10 months ago

Brad Pitt is Beta as fuck. He might be attractive and famous, but he's far of being an example of an Alpha male.

[-] natodraht 2 Points 10 months ago

He mentioned his children quiet often so probably he was more in for his children than for his wife.Do you really think he would have behaved like this when there were no children? A cheating wife while he is quiet well of financially?

[-] 3d_truth 1 Point 10 months ago

We are here to learn. And there are definitely lessons to be learned here, but putting responsibility on woman teaches us nothing and denies us the chance to look at the situation critically and assess what the guy couldve done better.

[-] Tarkakabhai 1 Point 10 months ago

Well, but we need the whole story.what was her childhood and past like.It takes two to tango as well. Some are wired to cheat no matter what.

[-] [deleted] 10 months ago
[-] nester79 31 Points 10 months ago

I would have just fucked other women after the first time. Nothing gets a woman more upset than when they realize their provider might leave for another woman and provide for her.

Case in point. I'm currently "dating" a married woman whose husband is a complete beta that can't provide for her at all (she's the breadwinner because he's too lazy to work). I do take care of her material desires with nice bags and shoes (yes that's against rp rules) and to her it's fuck worthy. When she starts getting whiny or acts out - wanting to go party with other friends, I let her and then the same time I plan dates with my "friends who are women".

Nothing shuts that shit down faster than her jealousy of a younger sexier woman who is going to potentially replace her.

[-] AllgBeamtenrecht 21 Points 10 months ago

you realize you are the same beta to her as her cucked husband, right? that you literally buy ´´sex and affection with money like a good old beta buck. no reason to feel proud

[-] Unboundaries 2 Points 10 months ago

Not exactly. It's one thing if you're a fucking a woman all the time, and want to buy her a gift. It's another to just buy gifts for a girl, just because she's a girl.

This woman gives him what he wants, whenever he wants it, so in this scenario if he gifts her a purse, it's so be it. As long as it's on his terms it's fine.

[-] nester79 -6 Point 10 months ago

I'm getting sex, period. That's the whole point. If she acts like a bitch, I have plenty of other women I move on to.

I'm not saying I'm a 100% alpha but I have a job that characterizes alpha traits (trauma surgeon), I drive aggressively fast cars, I can most likely beat you in a triathlon (just guessing here), and I make a lot of money. You can call me beta bucks all you want but I use money as a tool- I never spend anything I feel is a sacrifice, and honestly if I'm getting out of it what I want then who cares?

I never commit emotion to these women and I have never had a moment in the last 20 years where I didn't get sex when I wanted it. This includes when I was dirt poor in school and residency.

[-] Atheist_Utopia 5 Points 10 months ago

I don't understand why this is getting downvoted to oblivion. Even though I'm in no position to call you guys wannabe textbook alphas, but you've got to think in practice.

Acting 100% redpilled would just turn you into an emotionless robot, getting you results no different than the bluepill equivalent.

[-] PsychedelicDentist 1 Point 10 months ago

I feel like this should be a post on it's own

"What the red pill is not about"

[-] [deleted] 8 months ago
[-] UltimateCrypto 1 Point 10 months ago

Dating a married women and buying her presents to keep her in line.

You're getting played worse than OP. lol

[-] nester79 0 Points 10 months ago

False. Two big differences:

  1. I have no emotional ties so I can leave at any moment and could care less. Money is only a vehicle to get what I want.

  2. The money I spend on her is beans. Say you make 100k a year - would u care if you spent 10 bucks on a woman for gifts and they put out? Let's just say that I make enough that the gifts I buy her cost next to nothing in the big picture.

The OP not only spent money that he felt was sacrificial, he was emotionally devastated. Being played means that you are being used. I guess relatively speaking you could say that she's using me for these gifts but guess what - I'm okay with it because I'm using her for sex and I move on at will. I have found that this method gets me more sex with hotter women in a shorter amount of time than other methods - no need to deal with shit tests for the most part or drama at all. I have much too busy a life with real pursuits and efficiency is of utmost importance.

Haters gonna hate but I'm the guy that's "beta" yet fucking your wife and/or gf regardless of ur red pill skills.

[-] UltimateCrypto 1 Point 10 months ago

lol you're busy "dating" a married women, trying to keep her in line.

You're anything but that last line. Nice fantasy.

[-] nester79 1 Point 10 months ago

Explain how I'm "dating". I spend less than 3 hours every 2 weeks with her and half of it is fucking. It's very time efficient. I don't think you could say the same for yourself.

As for the last line, the last 4 women I've "dated" have been married or "taken" women so I'm not sure how that's a fantasy. As you can obviously tell, I don't need an emotional attachment unlike most of you who "claim" to be red pill and dgaf.

Like I said - if you want to hate, go ahead but I've probably accomplished more than most people ever will and have become a better man throughout time. Not sure majority of people on this forum can say the same.

[-] UltimateCrypto 1 Point 10 months ago

You were the one that said dating.

If life is as good as you say it is, you wouldn't have even mentioned that married chick. She'd be a nothing pump & dump in your pool of pussy abundance. You're investing way to much time and effort.. think about it.. You're buying her gifts, and manipulating her by hanging out with chick friends so she gets jealous and wants to spend more time with you.

Bruh, I'm not hating. You need to walk away! You're in to deep.

[-] nester79 1 Point 10 months ago

I appreciate the concern but I think I'm okay. I do like her as a person but like I said I've walked away before and been fine. If there was an emotional tie then yah huge red flag of being in top deep.

"Dating" was used loosely. I guess in this day and age it can mean anything and I meant I spend time with her and fuck (usually drinks at a hotel bar and then the bed).

I wouldn't call her a pump and dump just yet - she's reliable pussy for now. If she ever became crazy long term I'd leave.

I will say one thing - "taken" women who "pretend" to be all religious and devoted and so in love are fun because of the challenge.

[-] CtrlAltLOL 1 Point 9 months ago

Lol. No emotional the other than the need to keep her around by buying her gifts and using jealousy to keep her from running off to bag other dudes. You ain't playing her, she's playing you and her husband. You're the plate.

[-] nester79 1 Point 9 months ago

False. I can leave anytime. If this is the way I operate then so be it. It's my choice. Is she getting benefit out of it? Sure maybe but so what? I'm still getting what I want and involved with other women. My life is great and I've accomplished a lot and still continue to.

I see nothing wrong with the way I do things. That being said if I was someone that pulled in a shitty income and lived an average life then this wouldn't be the way to do things. As it is, my net worth continues to increase while I spend time doing what I enjoy and put in minimal effort to get laid with women I'm highly attracted to.

It's a win for me and in the end the big picture is living the life you want - I'm doing just that. Can't say the same for most people.

[-] Unboundaries 1 Point 10 months ago

Literally what I would have done. FORCE her to see the man that you are, and force her to see that she can be dropped in a heartbeat for other vagina. Odds are, this probably would have straightened her up before any "therapy".

[-] replicaplater 26 Points 10 months ago

The more money you make, the more vigilant you need to be in keeping track of what's going on in your life especially if you're married. The other important thing I'm seeing here is that the line between beta provider and showing value gets more precarious as you make more money.

Sad story but this guy screwed himself, and his kids(sadly) over once he got content with his situation. Who knows if it was arrogance or stupidity, either way he got screwed and more likely than not, the court system is going to shove a pike in ass for his troubles.

[-] empatheticapathetic 18 Points 10 months ago

He didn’t know any better. It’s a strange Fucking rule that makes no sense logically.

[-] Freedom2speech 3 Points 10 months ago

What if she makes more money and you are caking off it?

[-] yaxis50 2 Points 10 months ago

Then she will work on a plan to divorce you without her having to pay alimony. Maybe if you have enough children the child support payments will cancel the alimony due out.

[-] WinterlsCumming 1 Point 10 months ago

You would place blame on the dad for his kids in this situation? That’s very ridiculous

[-] [deleted] 25 Points 10 months ago

[deleted]

[-] yazen_ 3 Points 10 months ago

My reaction when I read Tesla

[-] Auvergnat 24 Points 10 months ago

Humans have an innate understanding of the sexual marketplace, and both sexes know they need to show "value" as a potential mate. But many people of both sexes have no idea of what the other sex truly values. This is why we have women going for prestigious degrees or careers in the partial hope that this makes them more valuable, and we have blue-pill betas showering girls with gifts and attention and sacrifices in the hope that this makes them more valuable.

When Mystery and others came up with the idea that you need to Demonstrate High Value (DHV) in pick-up, they meant being fun, being mysterious, being interesting, being exciting. They meant valuable alpha traits.

[-] awake283 11 Points 10 months ago

being interesting

Honestly this all it really is. And buying expensive gifts doesn't make you interesting, it makes you desperate. And nothing turns off a woman more than desperation.

[-] SKRedPill 6 Points 10 months ago

Sexual attraction is a very pure instinct that evolved before civilization was a thing.

[-] FlamingAmmosexual 19 Points 10 months ago

This part stuck out to me:

The only surprise I received when I pulled into the driveway was seeing a Ford SUV in my garage, and finding not one, but TWO men in my bed. With my wife.

My wife started babbling when it happened, desperately trying to explain. I heard none of it. I walked out of my room, went to the basement, and poured myself a drink. I could hear the men upstairs leaving, and when I returned upstairs, it was my wife sitting there, clothed, with a sad smile on her face.

Alright. Am I the only one here that would walk out and allow two strange men to be unsupervised in my own house?

The basement? It comes out sounding like he's a whipped dog while his wife does whatever. What if the guys didn't leave?

Tell her to get some clothes on and the two strangers to get out of the house. Just leaving them all there makes this guy sound gutless.

[-] CapnRonRico 36 Points 10 months ago

That is the thinking of someone who has either never been in a situation like that or cannot put themselves in the position of others that think differently from themselves.

Have you ever been in shock before, true real shock where the information coming in is too much to process?

You just sound like someone that has played these things out in their own mind yet has never lived it.

[-] truedemocracy3 4 Points 10 months ago

Yep. This is akin to the "a guy comes in with a gun why didn't you take him out!" Level shock. Where your literal reality is warped.

[-] FlamingAmmosexual 1 Point 10 months ago

That is the thinking of someone who has either never been in a situation like that or cannot put themselves in the position of others that think differently from themselves.

I personally know two guys this happened to. One went for a gun as the guy ran out. The other immediately started beating the hell out of the dude and chased him out.

Have you ever been in shock before, true real shock where the information coming in is too much to process?

Those guys I mentioned? They experienced shock. They told me their mindset right before, during, and after. The thing is fight or flight kicked in. There was no thinking for them.

This guy sure had the wherewithal to go down and pour himself a drink. He could go get a gun or ball bat to get the strange men out of his own house?

You just sound like someone that has played these things out in their own mind yet has never lived it.

I've had guns pointed at me. Walking in on a gang bang isn't nearly as bad.

[-] CapnRonRico 3 Points 10 months ago

Why would you have animosity towards the guys in this situation, they are just doing what guys do?

I have never understood that mindset, if your significant other is cheating then the animosity should remain between you and her. Perhaps you are partly at fault and perhaps she is.

[-] nofap___ 15 Points 10 months ago

The basement? It comes out sounding like he's a whipped dog while his wife does whatever. What if the guys didn't leave?

It sounds like a man who just went downstairs to grab his gun, and if I don't get the fuck out of his wife's house faster than I can pull my pants up that guy is going to blow my fucking brains out.

[-] [deleted] 2 Points 10 months ago

Dude thank you. This is all I've been thinking about here. These two bulls have balls. I have a 9 under my mattress, and although the retrieval of it would be a bit awkward under these circumstances, I'd likely go for it.

Who the fuck is comfortable banging a married woman in a man's bed? I dunno, maybe I'm old school.

[-] ECoast_Man 1 Point 10 months ago

Yeah this is why I don't knowingly fuck married women. It has absolutely nothing to do with moral code but self-preservation.

Going to the slut's house to fuck her in his bed is brazen, but even doing it at my place has risks.

You never fucking know who you're dealing with. Even loser guys can just fucking snap (Lord knows she's been treating him like garbage the past year or more) and show up at my place with his new .45.

[-] [deleted] 2 Points 10 months ago

Yeah man. Or the hubby's mob connected. There are any number of unlikely circumstances that you're all of a sudden smack in the middle of. I have a feeling the people who do this shit have never learned really hard lessons surrounding this kind of stuff. What if the husband's an alcoholic roid head who knows Jiujitsu. All of a sudden your fucking neck's broken and too bad, you're trespassing. I dunno. BALLS

[-] ECoast_Man 1 Point 10 months ago

Exactly. And frankly, I don't even think you need that. Some beta who had his life destroyed could just fucking snap.

Dude has been working his butt off to keep her happy, she treated him like human garbage for the past year, finds out she cheated with me and humiliated him? That could push him right over the edge. I can easily see that scenario playing out, let alone the roid-head or mob connection scenario.

[-] CtrlAltLOL 1 Point 9 months ago

And then what? Shoot the guy fucking your wife? This does not sound like the reasoning of an adult. Are there no laws where you live, or are you going to ignore them because your feelers got hurt and you don't care about what happens to you when the law decides your feels don't matter.

[-] Archterus 14 Points 10 months ago

Or not. 2 against 1, no knowledge of your enemy. I get how it reads gutless but from a different perspective smart. No drama, no cops. I have seen many a case of a guy walking in and catching the wife in flagrante delictio, taking to the guy, cops called and guess whose arse gets hauled off with an intervention order shortly following.

[-] AllahHatesFags 2 Points 10 months ago

These men and others have probably been unsupervised in his house multiple times and they already fucked his wife so it's not like they could do anything worse. The men aren't really the problem here and are only there because the wife is a nasty slut. If he were a whipped dog he wouldn't have kicked his cheating wife out the house.

[-] mynameisntjulio 16 Points 10 months ago

It's entirely possible that she started off as a good mother and devoted wife.. Regardless this story serves as a warning that a long term relationship with a beta can bring out the absolute worst in a woman. Betas cannot provide the strength and structure that an alpha provides, and which she needs to bring out the best of her femininity

[-] SoulOf1Lion 14 Points 10 months ago

what a fucking hoe. but i blame it also on the guy ..... a tesla, really?

[-] okuli 23 Points 10 months ago

That's blue-pill conditioning our society does through movies, media, social pressure, etc.

I know a guy in his 50s when his GF tried to dump him bought expensive vacation which probably burned all his savings. She left him two weeks after vacation. She's fucking other guys, but they're still "friends" when she needs something from him. He's really hurt, but he still can't see what he did wrong and still trying to buy her things and hopes that some day she'll be with him. Some people never learn.

[-] HumanSockPuppet 14 Points 10 months ago

Sounds like another Red Pill convert in the making.

[-] RxCubed 13 Points 10 months ago

That story was painful to read and the guy that wrote it is a complete and total cuck and idiot.

The second I get the slightest inkling I'm being lied to, off with your head. Yet, he goes on a business trip while she is in a pattern of lying?

Moron should've got a divorce lawyer and hired a private investigator to start building a case the second her GPS said she was somewhere other than where she claimed.

People that dumb get what they deserve. That's not even blue pill, it's just utter stupidity.

[-] [deleted] 6 Points 10 months ago

start building a case the second her GPS said she was somewhere other than where she claimed.

Like that matters with no fault divorce laws.

[-] RxCubed 1 Point 10 months ago

It does matter because she will get less or no money, even in a no-fault divorce state.

[-] Trp2166 1 Point 9 months ago

Nonsense. You can’t just cancel your life on the off chance your wife is getting double teamed while you’re away. If she’s gonna fuck herself over like that he should let her, because that’s about the only way you’re ever gonna get custody

[-] pmmedenver 11 Points 10 months ago

We need to stop blaming the people and start blaming the culture. Marriage hasn't worked since we stopped cutting off cheater's tits (and even then they still cheated). Read Sex at Dawn.

/thread

[-] magx01 4 Points 10 months ago

How could you have read Sex at Dawn but still pin it on culture when the issue is clearly BIOLOGY?

We'll always have these issues because our culture, with respect to our biology, is a square peg round hold problem.

[-] drleeisinsurgery 10 Points 10 months ago

I cannot thing of anything as emasculating as seeing your wife getting double teamed.

I'm glad this guy realized what a cuck he was.

[-] Fedor_Gavnyukov 1 Point 10 months ago

I cannot thing of anything as emasculating as seeing your wife getting double teamed.

seeing her triple teamed?

[-] [deleted] 10 months ago
[-] DeeplyDisturbed1 10 Points 10 months ago

most therapists are women and will be actively sabotaging the therapy sessions.

I can verify this right here.

[-] Parara_papapapaVeis 9 Points 10 months ago

"Bought her a Tesla"

NOOO GOD PLEASE NOOOO

[-] dustman83 9 Points 10 months ago

One detail over looked in this post was that the wife was also successful as an optometrist. Isn't that a straight up eye doctor? She was probably taking in as much cash as the husband, She had a lot of control in this situation. If the dude had lower smv and lower salary, big recipe for disaster. She also had everything she ever wanted, except DP.

While AWALT, you can severly keep them in check if you make far more and are more successful. Career women that have money are more likely to cheat IMO.

[-] Thegymismyhome 14 Points 10 months ago

Nah, Optometrists are not Physicians. They are diagnosticians but make significantly less than ophthalmologists. Ophthalmologists went to medical school and went through a clinical residency, optometrists did not have the rigor of schooling.

[-] dustman83 2 Points 10 months ago

Ok cool I wasn't sure. Guess I can recant my statement. Just a spoiled ho.

[-] Thegymismyhome 3 Points 10 months ago

It’s all good, I’m sure she made good money, but yeah that whore can go kill herself lol. He’s an idiot for spoiling her though.

[-] Freedom2speech 2 Points 10 months ago

I don’t know ... a guy can have lower salary but can still maintain smv by just not giving in to a females incessant demands. Trust me I know ...

[-] dustman83 1 Point 10 months ago

I agree, but I do think it only helps you if you have more money, power

[-] ThatGuyIam123 8 Points 10 months ago

I love the fact that she was getting plowed by TWO dudes lol

[-] awake283 10 Points 10 months ago

Id love to hear how she rationalized getting double porked in her mind

[-] Fedor_Gavnyukov 6 Points 10 months ago

"I'm at a stage in my life where i need to experiment and find myself" - a married woman told me that a few days ago when we met up at Starbucks before i took her home and fucked her brains out

[-] awake283 3 Points 10 months ago

It's just crazy how their minds are able to reject all self-blame sometimes.

[-] [deleted] 1 Point 10 months ago

Yeah, 2 dudes 1 truck. That was a fun curveball. Must have been some drive home.

[-] alphalion52 7 Points 10 months ago

True love is hard to find. Sometimes you think you have true love and then you catch the early flight home from San Diego and a couple of nude people jump out your bathroom blindfolded like a god damn magic show ready to double team your girlfriend.

[-] bigpoppasweet 2 Points 10 months ago

Fuck I really wanted that comment

[-] You_Know_This_MAN 2 Points 10 months ago

haha I was thinking this the entire time I read the story

[-] atticusfinch1973 7 Points 10 months ago

One thing to remember about women - always (especially attractive ones) - is that dick is literally a text message away at any time. If you look at some web sites even like this one a woman can jump on, post an anonymous message she wants to fuck and she will get two hundred responses in less than 24 hours. Organizing a threesome with random guys could take a couple of hours.

If you don't believe me go to some of the subs (like adultery) where women talk about the sneaky things they do or post on something like dirty r4r as a woman and see what happens.

Expect that this will happen if she loses attraction. Which will happen inevitably at some point. Expect to have this happen and then the key is to make sure that if/when it does, you literally don't give a fuck and can just walk away shaking your head and find the next woman.

[-] diamondstudz 5 Points 10 months ago

yes, as OP said, if you have money, the key to making it work to your advantage is spending it on YOU, not women. If you want to demonstrate value, don't buy HER expensive shit, buy YOURSELF expensive shit

[-] SirByron 4 Points 10 months ago

Older man here. What I found is the reverse - withholding gifts actually works. Deep, very deep inside she measures your self worth by how much you gift her. The more you give she demotes you. The less you give, she promotes you. This causes an inverse feedback cycle with her conditioning - in her mind she measures you as her provider. This causes a unresolvable conflict in her. But the amygdala wins. She will stay even if you don't give anything.

[-] TheseNthose 1 Point 10 months ago

Well that's pretty simple. It exists for everyone men and women that nothing worth having comes easy.

[-] dinnerwithfunions 4 Points 10 months ago

The best part is the “what about the kids?!” Yeah! what about the kids! why are you bringing two horny strangers into your kids home who are there to wreck your whole family’s relationship you dumb thot...

Guaranteed if she gets custody her kids are going to be seeing strange men coming and going day by day and it’s going to kill their self esteem and affect their performance in school. Betas, women, and spineless liberals will tell you it’s daddy’s toxic masculinity though. I’m so sick of this world refusing to recognize the elephant in the room.

Men are the patriarchs because men are the only ones capable of holding enough empathy to keep the family in order. It’s actually remarkable this guy tried to make it work for the sake of his family after catching his whore wife in the act. The sad reality is though, that if we tolerate this behavior I does more destruction to the family in the long run.. like an untreated disease.

[-] [deleted] 4 Points 10 months ago

Well, using money isn’t really the way to go to win someone over. You should develop a friendship first and really get to know someone before you bring them into your life. If you don’t, of course someone is going to use you and screw you over. I have had this happen to me with my ex-boyfriends. They thought “oh wow cool this person is well off and I can leech off of her forever”. I learned the hard way. I have noticed that super rich people tend to be lonely, as well, and will accept any lady as long as she is skinny and somewhat attractive.

A few years back I was chatting with a fellow who was flexing on me a lot, hoping to impress me and to win me over. He works in Seattle as a CEO for some kind of security business, has a bunch of shiny new cars, makes a lot of money, wears ugly designer watches lol, new shoes, etc etc. He was filipino (eugh, I am generally not attracted to asian men especially filipinos), shorter than me (I am 5’8”), bald, high pitched rodent sounding voice, has 2 yippy rat dogs, but I figured maybe he had a nice personality. I spent a few weeks trying to get to know him. He had absolutely no personality, he was all about his money and possessions. On his IG he would post pics of jewelry he had already bought, with a caption like “for my future wife wherever she is” which just weirded me out and made me uncomfortable. He has a bunch of gold digging IG models following him, commenting on his content, trying to get his attention. Then he complains to me that girls just try to use him all the time, to which I told him to stop flexing and just stay humble.

On phone calls he would constantly bring up his cars into the conversation, like dude I do not care about your 2017 brand new sports car, I hate cars. Stop talking about cars. I figure he is still single to this day or is getting screwed over by a lady like in the OP. If you bring up your finances in conversation it will either turn a woman off, she won’t wanna talk to you, or turn her on and she will want to exploit you.

[-] TheRedPike 12 Points 10 months ago

Hey everyone, I appreciate the reports and keep them coming, but I'm going to allow this one. She can't really help but give on that she is a woman because these experiences are going to be as a woman. What we frown on is when it is stated as a means of garnering special considerations.

While I don't agree with the "develop a friendship first" part, I think the rest of it is pretty close to what we say around here.

[-] CtrlAltLOL 1 Point 9 months ago

"Acting douchey, isn't attractive, short manlet, balding, blah blah blah -- but I tried to get to know him for a few weeks." She's trying to show that AWALT is wrong, but it is clear by her post that AWALT.

[-] [deleted] 10 months ago
[-] Unboundaries 2 Points 10 months ago

What's a beta male with money? A beta male, except with money. Nothing more nothing less.

I've too seen this type of person constantly posting material possessions advertising himself to society as this prowess of yuppy success but the truth is it works for nothing. The only woman you can catch with that net is the most intense form of trash character. The woman who can walk away from losers with money and not use them show a hell of a lot more of character than those who stay and milk them for all they're worth. If a woman ever tells you she dated a rich man she hated, just to collect all of the things that come with cash, you really need to be skeptical.

[-] [deleted] 1 Point 10 months ago

They’re bad people. I really, really, hate people that use others. Who take advantage of others. I see it happen all of the time and not just with rich people or well-off people in relationships. They’re those neighbors that will gladly take any food you make but will never return the favor, those people in the group project at school that don’t do any work and are relying on the “nerdy” people to do all the work, the kind of people that only talk to you when they need something. The scummiest kind of human, ever. My parents have always called them mooches or moochie people.

I used to have a pet chicken named Moochie and she was indeed a Mooch.. she only showed a lot of interest in you when you had food in your hand (much like a cat). Yet she still gave back in some ways, by being entertaining to watch and laying eggs. Not a total leech like the vast majority of humans.

[-] [deleted] 3 Points 10 months ago

I think what makes the modern world so crazy is just how easy it is for women if cheat now with the internet. Sure, a married woman in 1950 could probably get laid by asking a random stranger to fuck, but the logistics and risk were sooo much higher. Communities were tighter. People spent less time alone (less easy to get away) It’s just a huge step to take to do that in 1950, and there’s always the chance that he will rat you out and you are utterly ruined.

It seems that most of these old time affairs were people that you knew- neighbor, milkman, etc. Fucking your husband’s friend is a much bigger step that anyone is going to think twice about compared to fucking a stranger who lives 30 minutes away and doesn’t even know your last name. I’m not saying it didn’t happen, but there were much higher psychological and logistical barriers to overcome.

Now it’s as easy as downloading tinder, POF, or posting a personal ad, and literally within 20 minutes she can have a gangbang lined up. This is just not something that any society has ever seen before.

[-] [deleted] 1 Point 10 months ago

Also, the constant attention from strangers via social media. The average woman nowadays gets as much attention as did famous women of a previous era. Back then, many of these starlets went off the rails and overdosed, etc.

The other thing is that anyone from your past or anyone that simply knows your name can find you and message you on facebook. So, if you are married to a hot woman that is on facebook, you literally can have half the town stalking her in this way. It only takes one successful attempt to blow up your life.

[-] codeflack 3 Points 10 months ago

I was waiting for an RP take on this since the moment I saw it

[-] shortmanlongfingers 3 Points 10 months ago

most therapists are women and will be actively sabotaging the therapy sessions

Can someone explain this a little more in detail?

[-] Fedor_Gavnyukov 3 Points 10 months ago

women take the side of women

[-] yumyumgivemesome 3 Points 10 months ago

Just when I was seriously starting to feel like I should look for a great girl to finally marry... TRP has reminded me that AWALT. I love this community for how much it has made me strive to be a better man and for how many disasters it has undoubtedly prevented me from falling into.

[-] cluelessguitarist 3 Points 10 months ago

Its kinda funny right now im staying with a family in the states and the couples been married for 24 years and they are happy amd you know what i noticed, the most red pill about long lasting relationship is to always and i mean always tease and never take seriously your SO, this guy is always making fun of her wife, teasing her and not giving a fuck. You need to maintain frame an keep being a challenge, heck i think the best thing is to always tease and have fun about it , not putting girls in a pedestal is a game changer.

[-] Gozsayin2 3 Points 10 months ago

I would've loved to see the look on his wife face when husband walked in getting do something I'm sure she never does with husband

[-] Ddanndt 3 Points 10 months ago

Sorry to say your woman was a cheater no matter what you provide her she always will be cheating. Today If you genuinely love a women they will back stab you thinking you are not strong enough for them and they are generally attracted to men who are don't respect them,beat them and constantly shout at them so its not your fault

Even with 3 kids she was cheating on you I say who in their right mind would do that.Even if you are not given child custody please keep talking with them they are the one who need your support

[-] A5M 3 Points 10 months ago

Women are binary. There are men who make their panties tingle, and men who make their purses tingle. You CANNOT be both

I think this is far too simplistic, considering we are only given about 3 paragraphs spanning how ever many years it took for the break up of this marriage to actually occur.

You can definitely buy women gifts and still hold her attraction for you.

[-] someoneanonymouse 3 Points 10 months ago

He had enough money to buy a Tesla but not enough to buy a shotgun? At least to scare the shit out of them and preserve his dignity.

[-] askmrcia 0 Points 10 months ago

And if I was one of those guys I would sue your ass for pointing a loaded weapon at me and threatening my life.

Your wife invited me into your home. Your wife said I can sleep with her i your bed. You would be the bad guy and get criminally charged if you came at me with a gun.

[-] someoneanonymouse 1 Point 10 months ago

I would say that I was under the assumption that both of you were raping my wife.

[-] IVIaskerade 2 Points 10 months ago

Treat 'em mean, keep 'em keen.

The best reward for a woman who's done well isn't a tesla, it's a packet of skittles.

[-] [deleted] 2 Points 10 months ago

Wonder what the outcome will be?

She gets the house, all the cars, half his income for the rest of kids childhoods, alimoney, and 50%+ of his assets, would be my guess. There is no incentive to stop women cheating. Man cheats, woman divorces, gets everything. Woman cheats, woman divorces, gets everything.

Lesson? Don't get married.

[-] GritsWithGranny 1 Point 10 months ago

Unless he signed a prenuptial. Which probably didn’t happen...

[-] EdmondDaunts 2 Points 10 months ago

It sounds like he got focussed real quick after discovering the threesome. Just like that final whack with the stick brings Enlightenment. Maybe he’s now on the path, at least a bit.

Ultimately the tale is about contingency as in Have Some Contingency. That’s all you can do in the end.

[-] RedPilledGodEmperor 2 Points 10 months ago

$100K is some expensive sex. She probably wasn't even fucking him that often. Would have been better just going on tinder with a photo of him and an expensive mansion or doing rich guy stuff.

He could have gone the route of flat out paying for sex. What an idiot.

[-] johnnight 2 Points 10 months ago

I don't know how this would have prompted it, but in early 2015, I bought her a Tesla, for her birthday. It was complete downhill from there. I don't know how that would have triggered anything, but in the months following, she became increasingly distant from not only me, but our children.

I would try to explain this differently: every human needs a Petersonian game to play, where there are obstacles to overcome, goals and rewards, further levels. Meaning that rewards the struggle. 100 years ago men and women had enough natural obstacles to struggle against that they/we needed to stick together. Now we play on easy mode, but our psychological need to level up and move forward is still there.

If you just GIVE her a Tesla, what kind of Game are you? You are like a level in a game that only requires running right, there are no pits and no hurdles and the level ends immediately. Not engaging. Reward with no work is boring. A more difficult level is needed. This is why having a moderately difficult personality that throws hurdles at people and makes them work for the reward would be more attractive. (Women do the same with you, they throw hurdles too, when they want to test if you will work to overcome them.)

[-] Matt22blaster 2 Points 10 months ago

Saw this and wanted to tell the guy I feel for him. Forgot I'd been blocked from commenting on the sub for being subbed to trp.

[-] Fulp_Piction 2 Points 10 months ago

The key to this whole thing is in one line:

A well off neighbourhood (a step above ours).

Hypergamy don't care, bitches, so why should you. Think about the life this retard threw away because someone a bit better came along.

[-] awake283 2 Points 10 months ago

couples therapy lol

Id rather get shot in the head

[-] EminemLovesGrapes 2 Points 10 months ago

The moment where you have to buy your wife expensive gives to keep her around is the moment it's not worth it anymore.

There's a reason they say most men earn more money than women but most women spend more money than most men.

[-] ShaolinDRgn98 2 Points 10 months ago

I think there is more to the story besides a picture perfect marriage to just fucking two random dudes. Something had to be wrong the whole time or later on for this to happen. It does not just by chance happen.

[-] [deleted] 1 Point 10 months ago

My guess is that the wife was crazy the whole time, probably has some serious skeletons in the closet, and just hid all this behind some facade.

[-] ShaolinDRgn98 1 Point 10 months ago

yeah that’s what i’m thinking too honestly. Some people are terrifying with how good they can hide it.

[-] [deleted] 1 Point 10 months ago

Lifetime of being crazy and having to hide being crazy. Good practice for them.

[-] [deleted] 10 months ago
[-] zhantoo 2 Points 10 months ago

Didn't read the post, only the headline.

There is a clear line between giving gifts out of affection for a person, and out of desperation of a person.

It gets clear when the gifts are to convince her to love you, rather than solely to bring joy, and show your appreciation.

[-] dykedestroyer 2 Points 10 months ago

In case it’s not obvious: if you have proof of your wife stepping out, don’t confront them. Consult a divorce lawyer and do not let on that you plan to leave them

[-] rayterzz 2 Points 10 months ago

reading that story crushed my soul :(

[-] voyager14 2 Points 10 months ago

Hopefully he got custody over the kids... and the Tesla...

[-] rivetedoaf 2 Points 10 months ago

I came in here expecting incels type material but you guys are several cuts above them. There is actually good advice here. Maybe marriage is a bad idea.

[-] BackandStronger 1 Point 10 months ago

Hypergamy doesn't care. Hypergamy doesn't care.

Hypergamy DOES NOT care.

[-] SKRedPill 1 Point 9 months ago

And this is why expensive gifts are no substitute for attraction...

https://www.mensxp.com/special-features/features/44981-10-gifts-bought-by-celebrities-that-are-so-expensive-you-d-hate-your-partner-for-being-so-poor.html?utm_source=FB&utm_medium=Paid

I mean look at that stupid title. I hope someone can tell me how many rich guys on this list are still married -- the last 2 guys definitely are - but they're Indian.

[-] [deleted] 10 months ago
[-] JonasTheRipper 1 Point 10 months ago

Stop.

Wrong.

Do not pass go, do not collect $200

........... DCIGS?

[-] fuck-fuck-fuck-fuck- 1 Point 10 months ago

It’s hard to tell whether I was reading a real story or the opening the movie Old School.

[-] bonkai420 1 Point 10 months ago

My ex wife cheated on me and i forgave her. I can assure you this is a big mistake. If she does it once she will do it again and you will just continue to be hurt. Better to just rip the bandaid off and be done with it. She got custody of the kids btw.

[-] mozzerelacheesieboi 1 Point 10 months ago

Don’t marry a cunt, marry a woman who admires you. Not like god level worship, but let’s just say if she isn’t confident enough to brag about you, you’ll get cucked real quick.

[-] [deleted] 10 months ago
[-] Unboundaries 1 Point 10 months ago

Man picks trash woman, and wifes her. He tried to turn a hoe into a housewife by spoiling her. He failed to vet her character and was blinded by the vision of just having a beautiful woman around. Marries her, procreates, eventually woman cheats and he is stunned and shocked when it's very likely that all the flags and signs have been pointing to a cheap hoe for the longest time.

But hey, at least she was beautiful, right? Another dumb ass male ruled by feminine beauty. Pathetic. Try seeing past the vagina and seeing what's she's really made of before marrying.

This isn't a "red pill" story this is a dumb ass story of a man being blinded by feminine beauty and ignoring all the signs of a trash woman. Taking back a cheater. Just being stupid. This is like falling for a phone scammer sort of stupid.

[-] Tarkakabhai 1 Point 10 months ago

How do you vet a character successfully.

[-] [deleted] 10 months ago
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[-] walkingproblem 1 Point 10 months ago

I read all the comments I still not sure what @needsomehelp3211 should actually do, and at which point?

Because its looks pretty much like there is no good options at all.... And what he should not have done (prior to Tesla)?

[-] [deleted] 1 Point 10 months ago

Damn..this was painful to read with each passing word.

[-] truedemocracy3 1 Point 10 months ago

Why do you think things went downhill after the Tesla was bought? My thoughts - she already was cheating and justifying it to herself but a 100k gift firmly put her in the "I'm an awful person camp"

Guys. Don't buy your wife or gf unnecessarily nice shit. A surprise trip with a tent and some food for a hiking fuck fest will cost less than 1% and make her feel the same way

Anyways - never lose the physical sexiness

[-] [deleted] 1 Point 10 months ago

Yea it was probably just a coincidence.

[-] chicagorunner10 1 Point 10 months ago

This line also stood-out to me: " My entire family had noticed this behavior going on for over a year now, but I had had enough."

So this dude let OVER A YEAR go by where she was distant with him AND his kids. That's a big mistake.

Whatever is causing the stand-offish behavior, you can let a few days of that go by, maybe even 1-2 weeks, but that's it. If you let much more time than that go by without doing anything, you're essentially saying you're ok with it.

[-] [deleted] 1 Point 10 months ago

I think it's just the times and how modern women have been socialized to behave. Sexual liberation is to blame as well.

Traditional women tend to thrive on gift-giving and chivalry. Helgi raised an army to murder Sigrun's lover Hothbrodd, and Sigrun fucked him in response. Then died of sorrow when Helgi was murdered by Dag.

This ancient poem reflects the sexual dynamics of long past IMO. That was the way you attracted women back then. You do something heroic for them or court them with gifts.

The problem is that most men have held onto these tactics while others have adapted to the change. This is what TRP is all about.

[-] IJustWannaBeKing 1 Point 10 months ago

It's not an orgy it is a threesome

[-] Pastelitomaracucho 1 Point 10 months ago

Attraction cannot be negotiated. And it is not negotiated. Never forget that.

[-] [deleted] 1 Point 10 months ago

God, don't get married. If you have to because you want to raise a child, give the woman a small monthly allowance (NOT access to your bank account!!) **IN EXCHANGE** for her doing the cooking, cleaning, etc. You don't have to sit her down and make her sign a contract but make sure she knows she's in one and DO NOT BUDGE.

[-] CassiBoi 1 Point 10 months ago

“You cannot negotiate attraction”. This is such an important lesson to learn for guys that go to clubs to hit on women and don’t know when to take rejection and move on.

[-] halfback910 1 Point 10 months ago

Handouts breed greed, not gratitude. Every time.

[-] SovereignSoul76 1 Point 10 months ago

Buys Tesla, get's cucked like Elon.

[-] tiffanyoiler_ 1 Point 10 months ago

Noticed the cognitive dissonance in her when she asked about the kids? Clearly didn’t give a fuck about them if you can get plowed in your own home.

What I summarized from this story, don’t get trapped into marriage and always have some sort of leverage over your SO to keep them in place. It’s only going to get worse from now on brothers.

[-] Linut666 1 Point 10 months ago

He spoiled her and that made her lose all of her respect for him. Women don’t like or respect nice pushover betas no matter how much they say it. Focus on her actions, not her words and promises.

[-] AllahHatesFags 1 Point 10 months ago

AWALT, AWALT, AWALT! She's been taking miles of dick throughout the marriage before the cucked husband walked in on her being spit roasted. At least one of the three kids probably isn't even his so he would be wise to get a paternity test.

I do have to give the guy credit for kicking her out of his house because I so often hear about men leaving the houses they paid for during a separation and it boggles my fucking mind. He should continue to get ahead of this ASAP by keeping her from the house and kids as much as possible, changing the passwords to all their accounts, and getting the best lawyer his six-figure salary can buy.

[-] [deleted] 10 months ago
[-] magx01 1 Point 10 months ago

It's not an orgy of it's just three people.

[-] alpha_bravado 1 Point 10 months ago

It's a devil's threesome! MMF

[-] Corvus_Uraneus 1 Point 10 months ago

MMF isnt a threesome, its a train

[-] [deleted] 1 Point 10 months ago

I believe a train would require at least three men.

[-] Corvus_Uraneus 1 Point 10 months ago

I was quoting St. Patrice. I find your lack of faith disturbing.

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[-] dontgiveupcarib -1 Point 10 months ago

This is why all married men need to put some money into cryptocurrencies and tell no one but their lawyer or a will.

[-] [deleted] 5 Points 10 months ago

Courts will discover your bitcoins kiddo

[-] dontgiveupcarib 4 Points 10 months ago

Lol no they won't and there are other coins as well that are very difficult to trace. A lawyer/judge wouldn't know jack. Surprised with the down votes.

[-] [deleted] 1 Point 10 months ago

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[-] dontgiveupcarib 1 Point 10 months ago

And you have absolutely no idea how incredibly hard it is to track anonymous coins.

[-] [deleted] 1 Point 10 months ago

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[-] dontgiveupcarib 1 Point 10 months ago

Damn...respect to you.

You can’t hide your paycheck but a small portion of your savings you can keep away from all prying eyes.

Divorce rape is unethical.

[-] [deleted] 1 Point 10 months ago

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[-] dontgiveupcarib 1 Point 10 months ago

I believe you can give 14k in gifts/year and state it on your taxes. If all married men gave 14k in Monero to someone they trust, a parent for example, with the full knowledge of knowing it is yours after they pass away, is that money untouchable with a divorce?

Especially if the wallet details are released to a lawyer who will relay it to you after their passing?

[-] [deleted] 1 Point 10 months ago

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[-] RedwallAllratuRatbar 1 Point 10 months ago

can you have a deal with casino owner, he proves that you lost the money, and you just give him a cut and keep the rest of money?

"honey, today I lost one million in a casino"

[-] [deleted] 10 months ago
[-] okuli 1 Point 10 months ago

Your salary goes to checking account, that is how they will catch you

[-] dontgiveupcarib 1 Point 10 months ago

Yes, but you could put away a small bit every year that is only yours and noone can touch. She could only get 40 or 45% of the assets, which leaves you with a bit more.

[-] okuli 1 Point 10 months ago

You will have to provide all paystubs as part of divorce. It won't work.

[-] juliusstreicher 1 Point 10 months ago

One can make cash withdrawals from a checking account; I've actally done it.

[-] EminemLovesGrapes 1 Point 10 months ago

Married.

If you're scared of losing your money. Don't get married.

Nowadays there is literally no advantage to men marrying.

She cheats? Half your assets gone. You cheat? Half your assets gone. She divorces? Half your assets gone. You divorce? Half your assets gone.

Not worth it.

[-] dontgiveupcarib 1 Point 10 months ago

While I agree with you my comment was directed more so at married men.

[-] EminemLovesGrapes 1 Point 10 months ago

Still, you need to hide that shit very well then.

And do it WELL before hand. They'll find it somehow.

[-] dontgiveupcarib 2 Points 10 months ago

I suggest you look into anonymous cryptocurrencies and see how incredibly difficult it would be. Personally I report everything to the govt as part of my tax, but if my wife was having threesomes with dudes I would plan an exit strategy while pretending to work on the marriage.

[-] EminemLovesGrapes 1 Point 10 months ago

I'm probably never going to get married but thanks for the tip, I'll keep that on hand.

Me too man. If I was going to get married I'd have the exit strategy planned before she even says yes.

[-] [deleted] -4 Point 10 months ago

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[-] Hjalmbere 3 Points 10 months ago

The last part about finding her with two guys sounds very dramatic, but I’ve heard stuff that actually happened which was as bad as the quoted story. I’m on the fence.

[-] [deleted] 1 Point 10 months ago

What about it seems implausible? Other than the very close approximation to the opening of Old School lol.