Summary: IamGale here, the psych and marketing guy of TRP, I’m going to tell you a very personal story of loss, suffering, and recovery. This is the story of my best friend. He's very close to me and this is his journey. You’re going to learn a lot from this tale.
I first met Nick when he 12 years old. We related on so many levels that we instantly connected. He was shy. He loved drawing, painting those little Warhammer figurines, and played GTA just like me. Since I loved all those things we quickly bonded.
But Nick was a little odd. This story starts when we’re both 16 and at highschool. Despite the fact that he was incredibly tall for his age (6’3) and decently good looking, Nick never really expressed himself at school.
He would just become a chameleon around other people. A wallflower. He never expressed his own opinions because he had crushing low self-esteem and would hate when anyone judging his ideas. So Nick parrotted everyone else. He was a mega follower. At least in school.
He made me promise to never tell anyone, but Nick led a double life.
While at school he was on the basketball and football team, but he led a completely different life at home. You could say he followed Law 38: Think as you like, but behave like others. But it ate him up inside. All his “friends” shat on the kids who played computer games. So he hid that part of his life, despited that he was a huge gamer! This is where the downwards spiral started. He thought he had to follow the crowd and couldn’t be open about what he wanted to do.
He told me he went to go see a psychiatrist once. They had this conversation:
”Were you happy as a child?"
”I don’t know… I don’t remember being happy."
And we talked about that response. For Nick, it was normal to feel empty. In high school, he started getting into drugs, binge drinking at school, all while never talking to girls. Unfortunately, he developed bad acne and became very self-conscious so Nick became quite the recluse. There were periods where we didn’t talk for months.
But he would tell me when he started new projects and it wasn’t good...
See Nick lived a double life online. He played this computer game called Runescape, a massive online browser multiplayer game.
Runescape became his fix. It was better than weed or drinking for him. He spent literally every minute he could on the game improving his character. And it wasn’t a good influence because he started to get into dark stuff.
He told me later that he had these schemes of scamming people online. He would hack and sell these Runescape accounts on weird niche forums.
I only found out later that these weren’t schemes. That he actually went through with it and made money from it.
I was getting scared for Nick. I thought I might lose my best friend to an online video game and to the dark places of the web. I didn’t know how far he would go. He said he wanted to buy stolen credit cards online and order thousands of dollars of stuff from amazon (he pussied out of this one).
When I was at his house, his mom would beg me to help him. She would beg me to get him to stop playing. Nick’s mom had tried everything to stop him. She would take away his computer, cut the internet, stop feeding him, but Nick always managed to get back to gaming.
What’s surprising is Nick never went full Omega. He continued to live this weird double hacker life. He still played basketball and football for the school. He didn’t even like those sports, but Nick really wanted to fit in. And it would help him go to parties.
In an ideal world, I think Nick would have wanted to be a really popular high school kid. But instead, he just got by. He wasn’t great at basketball, but he was tall. He wasn’t great a football, but he was big. He wasn’t great socially, but most people left him alone.
But things turned around for him.
I thought Nick was finally going to break free from his anxiety and low self-esteem because of this one event.
After March break, Nick comes over and tells me he just had the best and worst vacation of his life.
His family went to a Dominican all-inclusive resort for Christmas and there Nick met two girls. This was very unlike Nick because he was a complete virgin and shy guy before this.
But Nick told me how he hooked up with two girls! With a giant grin on his face, he tells me that he basically fucked a black chick.
We’re still in high school at this point and I was impressed. But Nick was really nervous around girls, so I knew there must have been something more to this story.
This was the bad part that would eat away at Nick for years to come.
He told me he hooked up with two girls but that each time the same problem came up. Each time he couldn’t get it up. But he tried so hard and he was so nervous throughout the whole thing.
He told me got a hand job from a girl but he just couldn’t get hard. And then the girl left him there and he just felt so ashamed.
Then on another night, he brought this other young black girl back. She was down to have sex but again--he couldn’t get it up. He told me he went to the washroom looked at himself in the mirror. And started screaming at himself. Just berating himself how he was a fucking loser. He was just getting angry that he couldn’t perform.
I think he thought that he might never get the chance to get laid. He thought the world was going to end in 2012 with the Mayan Calendar and thought he would die a virgin… He was a little too into conspiracy and didn’t have much confidence in himself.
And he was right. Nick wouldn’t get laid again until many years later. But that didn’t stop him from getting oneitis on this dumb girl for the rest of high school.
Nick started doing bad shit.
He apparently created a bot net of Runescape characters to make money for him… He continued to scam people online and would buy random shit on eBay with the money he was making.
He even started doing this at school.
He’d offer to write essays for his friends, but secretly he would outsource the whole essay to this outcasted overweight girl.
He started drinking in school. Smoking Weed after school. I thought this was kind of stupid. We had a fight over this that went like this:
"Yo, you need to get drunk for philosophy class, it’s awesome."
"You’re becoming an alcoholic at 16."
"Fuck you, come drink with us."
That’s when I lost touch with Nick. See Nick got some street cred because he would pick up at the liquor store for other kids. Since he had his older brother’s ID and was really tall, he had a high success rate. I felt bad because I was the first guy to pressure him to go pick up.
Nick was scared shitless the first time he did it… But we peer pressured the hell out of him and he went through. He became our guy to pick up, but he took it a little too far. He started picking up all the time.
At this point we kind of lost touch. He got caught up in the outcast crowd and continued to live his double life.
Next time I talked to him was on our Prom bus. Around 20 of us bought a bus to take us to prom.
Prom was the biggest disaster of his young life. I’ve never seen him cry as much as he did on that night.
We were on the bus and Nick was going to town with the tequila.
And Nick finished a whole mickey of Tequila before he even got to prom! And like an idiot he left it in his jacket pocket. The security guards caught him, and wouldn’t let him into prom.
He started screaming like a 5-year-old at the security guards. Our principal even came down and just looked at him with the worst shame. After screaming failed, he balled up and cried. Then he vomited and cried some more.
His mom came to pick him up and apparently he balled the whole way home.
See Nick’s secret dream was just to be popular and get laid in high school. But by getting barred from prom, this became impossible for him. His dream was shattered. He was shattered physically and mentally.
But the funny thing is Nick didn’t remember anything after getting on the bus. His mom and I had to tell him what happened and I just felt bad for this guy.
After that, we both went to the same University and this trend continued there. Unfortunately for him, his skin got way worse. He developed severe acne and eczema on his face. He wouldn’t leave his room. To make it worse his hairline receded heavily…
The only thing that made Nick happy was playing that game Runescape
But then in the summer, they banned him. Apparently they did an investigation into his bot net and scams. They permanently banned all of his accounts.
This crushed Nick more than prom because he spent the last 3 years perfecting all his character. He was more in love with that game than with his life.
He told me there was nothing left to make him happy. It took him a year to get over this, which sounds a little ridiculous but he really created a close connection with this game.
It wasn’t all bad. Nick got into making cool YouTube videos and he soon found his replacement fix. He started making gaming and short goofy films and some of them got really popular on YouTube.
Nick craved validation and all those views made him happy.
But because he had really low self-esteem he never read any of the 100s of comments his videos got. I told him he was being ridiculous, but he didn’t listen. One bad comment would overshadow dozens of good ones in his head and so he just never read them. He couldn’t handle it.
You see for years Nick never really lived. He never got the validation he was seeking in real life.
He lived under his own self-imposed prison. While a lot of people praised Law 38: Think as you like, but behave like others, it crushed him. Other than me he never told anyone about what was really going on his life.
He bottled it up because he was so concerned about what other people thought of him. He had trouble making new friends and would wait until people talked to him. His solution was to always go with the flow and avoid conflict at all cost.
He had the regular desires of a teenager. He wanted to get laid, have lots of friends, make lots of money, but that never really happened for him. He just binged watched TV shows and stayed in.
While he’s not terrible looking, Nick believed he was ugly.
Apparently when he was younger people said he looked like he had down syndrome and he kept repeating that insult in his head.
He would take constant pictures of himself to see if it was true. When he got acne and started losing his hair and got glasses… Well, that didn’t help. But there was a glimmer of hope for Nick.
Nick started going on Reddit a lot after he got banned from Runescape. He loved the seddit subreddit because he dreamed of being one of these PUA gods. Of course, that never happened because he hardly approached anyone, but it became his main fantasy.
I told him that he probably need to take care of skin, fitness, first but Nick just liked to fantasize.
Nick became an armchair theorist lurker. For years, he would read this shit and never apply it. And he would just complain about how shitty his life was… It was hard to hang out with him.
And so all throughout his youth, Nick never really lived.
It was so sad because his low self-esteem kept him from fulfilling his potential. Luckily, Nick had something that kept him going. He had dreams of impacting millions.
He wanted to create stuff that millions of people would watch, read, consume. He wanted to have an impact, and that dream kept him going during his darkest days.
During the dark days where we would go months without speaking to a girl.
The worst part was that Nick had no one to talked to… He really couldn’t make new male friends and it was sad because he’d just feel empty.
I remember when Nick had a birthday party for himself. And almost no one showed up.
He started texting people begging them to come. He was even begging people he wasn’t even friends with to come. I told him, to screw those people and that we could just enjoy the night together.
But in his eyes, he was “unpopular” and the fact that no one came to his party proved that fact to him.
He took a theater class to open up more, but he just couldn’t connect to anyone there. He couldn’t act for shit. He had difficulty showing emotions. He theorized that he had Aspergers (which was bs) because his social life was so shitty.
But he did make one new friend who made his dick hard
Nick got his first girlfriend in University! And started having sex for the first time. Man, he was so happy. He was finally living part of his ideal life. He couldn’t believe he had been missing out on this for 18 years… And he got to have sex before the end of Mayan Calendar. But you know what happens to beta guys in relationships. Yea… they get whipped.
Suddenly, he spent all his time with this new girl. She became his life. Her friends became his friends.
Nick was just an extension of her life.
I told him to watch out, that he should get his own life and stop glowing over how great his girlfriend was, but he dismissed me. He was happy and he didn’t want to fuck it up. But time fucked it up. Soon Nick would tell me about how his girlfriend wouldn’t have sex with him… He wouldn’t admit this because he still thinks kindly of her, but for months she used him for emotional validation.
He wasted most of his time at University with this girl. It was only until his senior year that Nick really stopped wasting his life.
He discovered this weird new subreddit and started making radical changes in his life
In our last year of University, he discovered this new subreddit called TRP. You might have heard of it. He started lifting regularly. Then he started acting more confidently. He started asking for raises at his job. He started demanding more from girls and stopped being a pushover.
He stopped being a beta and broke up with his girlfriend. He started getting plates, and he started making more movies. Some of them started to win awards and got national press coverage.
Nick changed his life when he started hustling and started being honest with himself.
He started listening to Joe Rogan, Tim Ferriss, Mike Cernovich, and hundreds of other amazing male role models that got him motivated to fearlessly go after what he wanted.
See Nick's mistake was that from 16-21, he was a follower.
He consumed but hardly created. He mindlessly went with the flow of life.
That mistake cost my friend 5 years of his life. Now years later the guy is a real hustler. He skins is way better and he's in great shape. He's on finasteride and minoxidil for his hair. He’s following his own life, creating his own plan, and lives by his own values. Don't let 5 years go by. I challenge you to live by your own plan right now.
But I have a secret to tell you:
Nick wasn’t my best friend.
Nick was me.
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[deleted] 7y ago
I know this is an older post but I had to comment. I did the exact same thing with RS accounts and you are literally me bro. I thought I was reading a story about me. That game was my life in HS. And I was the exact same way personality wise. I thought I had asbergers too..
IamGale 7y ago
You're not alone mate. How are things going for you now?
[deleted] 7y ago
Doing better man. Had a drinking problem but have limited my drinking lately and feel 100x better.
Asked a 8/10 waitress for her number last night and she gave me the boyfriend excuse but I called her out on her BS and ended up getting her number by simply asking her if she was "sure she didn't want to give me her number". This is the first time I've ever tried anything like this and it was my "Holy shit red pill works" moment.
IamGale 7y ago
That's awesome! Yeah I've been losing massive weight lately going down from 103kgs to 90kgs.
I had this girl over the other day. And I've never done this before but I decided to try something risky. She's a solid 8.5 and was stringing me along.
Maybe not today or tomorrow or in the next couple months but it was going to happen.
She was taken aback by that.
Then told me it was never ever going to happen.
Then she asked me to walk her to the subway station.
Anyways sometimes it works. Sometimes it doesn't. But regardless it's always good to be bold.
[deleted] 7y ago
That's good man weight loss is pretty simple once you put your trust in your diet.
That's crazy that you tried that though idk if I'm that balsy yet but hey at least you tried. You never know maybe she'll come crawling back after thinking about what you said haha
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KingAlphaWolf 8y ago
saw that ending a mile away.
tolerantman 8y ago
The 48 laws of power is an extremely overrated, shitty book. A lot of the "laws" contradict themselves, the book is a big mess.
IamGale 8y ago
I think there's some really useful information in that book. Yes it's impossible to apply everything but there are fascinating historical anecdotes.
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definitelynotaliar 8y ago
If you are Nick, how did you meet him ehen you were 12, huh? Checkmate
Hippo_Kankles 8y ago
PLOT FUCKING TWIST HOLY SHIIIIIIIIT ????????
Are you Tyler durden???
EntitledShitHead 8y ago
This is one of the most inspirational posts I have ever read. I am so happy for you! Thank you so much for posting this!
IamGale 8y ago
Thanks man! Also, I recognize you from your post, "TRP Maxims that work for me" which you dramatically removed.
EntitledShitHead 8y ago
One of the mods liked parts of it, but he felt that parts of it were hurtful to people who were new to the community.
I am a HUGE believers that high status people give a lot of value to those around them and help those around them. (E.g., one of my high status acquaintances pulled some strings to get me an interview at a worldly renowned company that anyone in my field would love to work at. It only cost him a quick phone call, and I am honestly forever grateful to him.)
A lot of people here are former Nice Guys that have been milked as orbiters to chicks and by their friend groups, the last thing they need is to be milked some more.
Upon much reflection though, I concluded that it is probably better to just give value to those that would do the same for you. And obviously you should always try to get more out of relationships with women than what you put into them.
Anywho, your story is very similar to my life. Almost a mirror. It's always cool when read something like this.
IamGale 8y ago
Especially with women, but being generous definitely helps psychologically. Adam Grant has a good book called Give and Take. A little blue pill but there's really useful advice.
mr_nate_ 8y ago
God damn it dude, let me give you a bro hug.
milugan 8y ago
Written by:
M. Nick Shyamalan.
optimumone 8y ago
everyone is going thru something -- in high school or college or both ... and everyone wants to fit in.
if you had befriended half of the "coolkids" in college or high school you would have KNOWN this and seen your problems as normal. i knew drop dead 10s who were absolute headcases - i mean crying every night for years and not knowing why and destroying sinks with baseball bats.
congrats for being average.
[deleted] 8y ago
great post, quality content 10/10 would read again.
DESTRO1196 8y ago
I don't know why but I cried.
ogrejr 8y ago
Uh. What exactly was the lesson here? The new information I was going to learn?
All I read was someone's sob story about being a loser most of his life then trying to not be, by using basic TRP knowledge.
Congratulations, you're like 98% of the men on this sub.
ex_addict_bro 8y ago
Yes. The only insightful comment after 2 hours is yours, /u/ogrejr . And you already were downvoted 3 times. This sub is going to SHIT. There is no new lesson, there is no red pill in this fucking post! There is just VALIDATION SEEKING! He came for the pats on the back, he got them, great. Now we're a circle jerk of girlies here. COOL.
This is why I don't come to this sub too often. There are more radical ones out there.
And that's all it is. Not being a loser after implementing basic TRP knowledge. NO NEW LESSONS HERE. Mods?
cynicalprick01 8y ago
I have been noticing it too.
the upvoting power is more in the hands of the new ppl here, so they upvote stuff that makes them feel good instead of analyzing the quality of the content then upvoting based on that.
DannyDemotta 8y ago
If the mods read your post, they're more liable to delete your post, and warn/ban you for Concern Trolling than anything. Tbh fam. Your concerns may be valid, but its clear you're not familiar with the sidebar material and the basic rules of this forum.
Random ass nobodies do not decide which direction this forum goes. Neither does a Democratic/Majority vote. RPS, the Mod Team and the Endorsed/Senior Contributors do.
ConcealingFate 8y ago
Kinda funny because instead of playing all the popular games in school, I played stuff like Counter Strike, Quake and StarCraft and people looked at me weirdly.
I've made some friends online. People I meet every once in a while or once a year if they live in the States but thanks to these people who liked my ''online'' persona, I felt happier and didn't need to hide behind a facade for them so I started doing that with my closer friends and people around and who would have thought, when you start to own yourself, people roll with it.
Granted, at one point I had my edgy phase and was an asshole to a lot of people for no real apparent reason other than ''Not my problem if you feel offended'' kinda mentality.
IamGale 8y ago
Me too man! Gaining confidence in one area creates an overflow effect.
[deleted] 8y ago
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p00nbrigade 8y ago
Seriously. Running a bot farm while all of your other friends flip burgers as high school kids would have been the shit. I wish I was smart enough to have done that.
IamGale 8y ago
You're right there's much darker parts of the Internet.
Tuginec 8y ago
wow, this sounds like my life. fortunately I just turned 20. I think I'm having enough of my 4 year girlfriend and the stupid addictive games i play.
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[deleted] 8y ago
Wait....You want to go to prom over Runescape?!
Just kidding, great write up.
IamGale 8y ago
Haha this literally cracked me up, you're the best.
thisisathrowaway2703 8y ago
I feel so lucky to have found TRP at 20. The timing was perfect for what I was dealing with at the time with my flatmate/oneitis. Since swallowing my life has improved MASSIVELY. TRP gave me the tools, and I went out and applied that shit. Internalized it, meditated on it, tested it, got out my comfort zone. The truth is beautiful.
KnowBrainer 8y ago
I can't believe I read the whole thing. School drama is so funny in hindsight.
And Law 38 is objectively beta.
[deleted] 8y ago
Law 38 is often very misunderstood.
I interpret it as "know what the status quo is, and use it to your advantage."
If it better serves you to be seen as going along with the status quo, then in public, you go along with it. What you think and personally believe does not matter when it comes to this law. All that matters is perception.
Remember that not all Laws apply at any given time. They're highly situational.
IamGale 8y ago
Yea it was a long post, almost 3000 words. I saw a high school kid at the coffee shop today who was all up in high school drama.
I just laughed to myself, so aimless.
Mithra9009 8y ago
I always saw Law 38 as a kind of war tactic in social interaction. Your goals as an alpha is always the same: accrue power for your goals/complete your goals. There are times where it's beneficial to you to stand out boldly and others where it's best to lie low. You'll do what it takes to win.
It didn't really sound like Nick was applying Law 38. When Law 38 is presented in the book, it's really just about not sticking out when it isn't advantageous to do so. It sounds more like Law 48: Assume Formlessness. Nick never consistently asserts the same personality. He tries to blend in, much like a chameleon as he described, saying whatever he needs to say in order to avoid upsetting the social harmony. The author even states at the end of that chapter that you should never confuse the tactic of formlessness with a lackadaisical go-with-the-flow approach to life because that's not powerful at all. In that case, you've just left yourself at the mercy of those around you so I don't see how this misunderstanding could come about.
It's about using formlessness as a form in and of itself. Formlessness is a form in much the same way that zero is the value of no value or black is the colour of no colour. It's great for defense (in Nick's case, defense from rejection) but when you attack, you must take on a form so that the attack is concentrated. An attack that isn't concentrated will have no effect whilst simultaneously revealing your intentions.
awalt_cupcake 8y ago
I only obey law 38 on crucial social things like politics right now. I pretend I'm liberal democratic. I'm not. I'm independent leaning on republican.
JimmyJiangh 8y ago
Live to fight another battle. There's no use dying for honor, always keep the end goal in mind.
Clint_Redwood 8y ago
Law 38 is anything but beta.
The entire 48 laws can be summed up to use by two methods. One, the Machiavellian version to use the knowledge it teaches to manipulate, control and influence an outcome out of people or a group.
Or two, used as a shield to protect yourself from these pitfalls that the naive succumb to and only learn through life experience and getting fucked over. 48 laws is a book about wisdom at its core.
Most read it or see it as immoral because human innately focus on the bad, just like Nick ignored the 100 good comments and focused on the 1 bad. We gravitate towards the worst possible outcome. There's a reason why apocalyptic scenarios are fantasied about in every culture.
Law 38 is there to protect you from having dangerous or fringe beliefs or opinions that differ from the status quo. If you worship Satan you probably don't want to be open about it if you live in 17 century Europe.
It's not there for you to use as an excuse to hide who you really are. Nick lacked agency in his life. He didn't take responsibility or own who he was. He was just a parrot trying to fit in because he lacked the spine to say, "Ya I like runescape, got a problem with that?"
48 laws is use as a sword or the shield, not a cloak.
[deleted] 8y ago
Hit the nail on the head.
Law 38 is a defensive law that reveals to us a lot about how perception works.
Many people get too caught up in being a special snowflake, living and dying by their beliefs (and thus forgetting laws 3, 4, 5, 14, 17, 19, 20, 24, 25, 26, 43, and most importantly, 48), and generally just having too much a need to express themselves.
Being a black sheep is bullshit.
chaseemall 8y ago
I'd disagree with that assessment. Misapplication/overapplication of Law 38 is def a sign of beta hamstering though.
KnowBrainer 8y ago
The alpha by definition leads, and therefore can't follow
FourFingeredMartian 8y ago
This can't be farther from the truth because leadership comes about in many forms, one of which is leading from behind; allowing others to emotionally/mentally grow by allowing them the reigns & a soft push in the right direction. A leader is someone that can take the backseat & grab the reigns when needed.
In fact there are about five forms of leadership that are easily identifiable:
Participative.
Authoritarian. Authoritative leaders inform employees of a common vision and goal for the company and detail employee responsibilities designed to make reaching that goal a reality. ...
Laissez-Faire. ...
Transformational. ...
To dismiss any of those types of leadership as "beta" simply means you may not be objectively looking at the situation & applying the best remedy to maximize the effectiveness of ones efforts.
KnowBrainer 8y ago
I guess there's a difference between mammalian alpha and red pill "alpha". One clue I had missed is that in TRP you can "become alpha" where in real life you either have it or you don't. The wolf runt can't just decide to lead the pack through determination and practice.
Clint_Redwood 8y ago
This is a bs fallacy that needs to stop being perpetuated. you aren't born alpha. that's the same line of bullshit thought that you are just born into riches or forever poor. It removes all agency from oneself so you can feel better about your shit situation and use it as an excuse to not try or improve oneself.
Your teachings, upbringing and experiences as a child and adolescence are 90% of what makes you you. All can be changed, all can be improved.
Read "The Charisma Myth". It will destroy all your notions that people are just 'born' with it.
Also, you need to study and read about the most successful men of history. All of them cite being able to listen, follow and understand as one of the top traits required to rise to the top of whatever profession or industry you are in.
Vrixithalis 8y ago
Genes dont real eh? Sounds like your typical cultural marxist crap. Blank slate and all that jazz? No thanks.
Evidence suggests that 90% of who you are comes from your genes. That might be a hard pill for you to swallow but its true.
ChairBorneMGTOW 8y ago
I constantly violate law 38. Fuck that bull shit.
Being outspoken, even in matters of politics, religion and gender relations is part of my charm. The key is, you have to be willing to let friends who disagree with you fade from your life to become acquaintances
HS-Thompson 8y ago
I bet it's not. Literally nobody likes to be lectured on those issues. You sound like someone who needs to read Dale Carnegie.
marinewannabee97 8y ago
Fuck dude, not going lie I teared up a bit here. That was me too. There are some differences. I also seemed validation so I bought a home gym. People started getting suspicious when the math nerd (glasses, ponytail, neck beard the works) started to get big. When I started competing in powerlifting I finally got the validation that I had been seeking even though I came 4th in my weight class this was the first time I had truly won at anything.
This was me though I feel that the best years of my life were wasted. Jesus dude, the likeness was almost scary. Knowing that I will never have highschool sex, never go to an underage hoiuse party, just eats me up. I hope you are doing better now. The silver lining is that I never went to prom, the stoners and I dropped acid and hence barely able to form words.
VegasSaint9 8y ago
Damn, that twist at the end there. Good writing man. I'm glad you found your way. I'm still looking to find my own way. I have the attitude, just need to learn to apply it correctly and start setting my life up money/education wise.
I used to be somewhat anti-social among newer people and was really only comfortable around my own friends. Even then I didn't make big efforts to socialize during HS. Now I just need to find smart sources of income while going to school.
IamGale 8y ago
Thank you. The money will come, focus on yourself and your habits first.
EmpReb 8y ago
Fuck..... damn write a book man. I mean a good one you already sold me. Also I had a simlar story but thankfully like am finally tracking towards what I want.
IamGale 8y ago
Good to hear mate. And thank you!
treefrog24 8y ago
I was about to say... No one in my life. Not even my best friends or parents have that much insight on me or what I have going on. "Nick was me". Got me
GMUwhat1234 8y ago
But but but I play runescape. Str level you noob!?
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Ayoung4u 8y ago
Mind=blown
Dragon whips and scimitars are where it was at, though. Balance the dragon slaying part of your life with some pussy slaying in the present.
IamGale 8y ago
Absolutely. I was merching that shit like crazy in the day. Now there are way better things in life.
ex_addict_bro 8y ago
You're still an addict, you just think you found your solution. TRP can fix a lot of things, but not all of them, especially if you still treat it as your fix. Your addiction can be easily seen. You just switched it.
Source: I am me and things don't look as bright as you say. I've been there, I wrote posts in the same tone.
You're not a special fucking snowflake. Now you post shit and feel great. You're still addicted to external validation. You came for points and pat on the back. Stop shitting yourself, get a shrink, get a proper therapy, fix yourself properly this time, don't ever think that an internet forum is going to fix your life. IT WILL NOT.
WTF, TLDR of your post can be like "I went to a doctor and started taking shit for my hair. I also lift. In the past [past]." That's all there is. Man, stop kidding yourself. You can do much better than this shit.
IamGale 8y ago
I actually have gone to a shrink. I'm not perfect right now. But I'm on my way.
kremer5 8y ago
Finasteride is known to cause issues with male hormones. If he's not aware of it, that's something to look into. It's no joke, I have heard of guys having their natural testosterone production shut down from that shit.
IamGale 8y ago
I've looked into and I'm okay with the risk.
[deleted] 8y ago
A little bit of editing would help you. This is incredibly TL;DR.
HungryLikeTheWolf99 8y ago
A little bit of not telling this story at all would also help. All these cheesy mind-blow bold font moments and utterly transparent autobiographical tone...
I didn't dig it and want my 10 mins back. All the way i was hoping it would turn good and live up to the promise I would have something to learn from this story, but it never happened.
redambience 8y ago
oh god more than 500 words at a time hurts my weak little brain i can't even
Rycy 8y ago
it's not the context it's the time wasted....
[deleted] 8y ago
Funny thing is, when you are so very concerned what others might think of you, you fail to realize that it's all illusions created by you. When you think someone is questioning your abilities for example, it's your subconscious trying to tell you that you are doing something wrong. Unfortunately you barely have time to introspect consciously, since all you care about is other people, people who don't give two fucks about you.
Caucasian-African 8y ago
Damn brother, well done. Why you gotta make a grown man cry? I think there's a little bit of Nick in most men. And of course, Nick looked fine to the outside world. After all, he was a 6'3" athlete. And we all know, men don't have feelings anyway...
chocobaby 8y ago
Glad to hear you have an accepting view of yourself and life. It can really suck balls but it is always up to you to change it. People always overestimate what they can accomplish in a year, and always underestimate what they can accomplish in five. Just stay focused.
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IamGale 8y ago
You got me
smokecheck1976 8y ago
You discovered one of the secrets of addiction. Whatever age you are when that first drop of whatever it is that really fires your dopamine and Oxycontin and become an addict is the age you mentally remain until you fight your way clean of the stuff, and sadly most won't.
Congratulations on growing out of it. Since you know that you have a personality type that is prone to becoming addicted, always make sure to watch yourself.
IamGale 8y ago
Thanks man!
Absolutely. I'm always careful to foster positive addictions now like writing.
Artiz2 8y ago
I'm not even ashamed of tears dripping down my cheeks right now
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Evileddie13 8y ago
Jesus Fucling Christ, 'Nick was Me'. Mother Fucker. I had a Emknight Shamalan moment. Or, whatever the fuck that dudes name is. Mother Fucker.
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throwawayyourliberty 8y ago
Give this man endorsed. It is time.
SpeakerToRedditors 8y ago
Jesus fucking Christ is TRP now /soc/
CornyHoosier 8y ago
Are you me? You sound like me. Down to almost every detail except mine was WoW instead of Runescape.
[deleted] 8y ago
I'm going to sound like an old fart here but I feel like the games kids play now are dangerous. Not in the school shooting sense, but in the ease of addiction and complacency.
When I was a kid (33 now), games were hard as balls. In order to beat them, YOU had to get better. I feel like it was actually a good life lesson. If something is hard, you either get good enough to beat it or die trying.
Games like WoW and all the other pussified games are dangerous because challenge has been replaced with simple grinding. You just keep doing menial tasks over and over and eventually you'll be able to tackle the hard ones. There's rarely a sense of "shit, I need to figure out how to get better".
This is a terrible lesson for young men as it teaches them that it's fine to stay in their comfort zone and just make a token effort. Everything will work out if you just do your daily grind.
Gawernator 8y ago
I'm not an old fart, 22, but see exactly what you are saying. I still grew up playing SNES and SEGA Genesis games, which were still pretty freaking difficult. Some of those olders games are downright impossible.
Not many games today are very challenging, I'll play RPG type games like Fallout or Skyrim, Tom Clancy etc... the challenge is there but always surpassable.
ControlBlue 8y ago
You are right that there is a big difference between we have now, had recently, compared to the game of old. Games of old were made to make living a fantasy possible, the people who made them were happy enough to make a game where you can increase your DEX, CHA and slay dragons. Then MMORPGs came to fulfill that fantasy thing and each one of them has been engineered over time to fuck its players.
All of them are engineered for addiction now. The focus on the questing system? Made so that you spent more time in the game and thus paid more money in subscriptions. The gear treadmill? Same deal to the power of ten coupled with easy content to make for the devs.
The only saving grace of those games is that they allowed millions of strangers to connect and play and compete together, that alone was enough to cover how shitty they really were.
But now people are realizing the shit behind the RPG part and that is the reason why MMORPGs are dying right now.
Polaris382 8y ago
Yeah games in general use to be way more difficult.
Fortunately I never got sucked into WOW, Runescape, LoL, or any of those. In my much younger years I use to be a fiend on those text based telnet MUDS (Multi User Dungeons), which were archaic compared to the more modern MMOs. Fortunately, it seems that I long since "outgrew" video games because anytime I legitimately try to get into one I very quickly get bored and quit. I still definitely understand how people get sucked into and addicted to them though and Im sure if I really looked hard enough I would probably find one which could still do that to me.
[deleted] 8y ago
I agree, strategy and puzzle games, and games against other players online, are the only ones I can tolerate. There needs to be something to think intensely about or it's crap.
[deleted] 8y ago
You're absolutely right about this.
aanarchist 8y ago
even the competitive games are more about finding patterns to exploit than developing actual strats and smart plays.
Corndog_Enthusiast 8y ago
"Get off my lawn!"
No kidding though, games were definitely harder from what I can tell from my dad's old stash, but I would never say that they teach life lessons in perseverance; it was an addiction just like we have today.
CornyHoosier 8y ago
You may be right.
For me it was an epiphany moment. I was in the game, sitting there bored and jumping my character around. I looked outside and saw three people throwing a fribee and I was a fat POS sitting in my chair bored, playing a game.
I haven't played a MMO since and drastically cut back on video games in general. It was odd, but freeing, that a thing that had taken up so much of my childhood and life was cast away so easily.
I was on a date recently and told a woman that I used to compete in video and board games and she didn't believe me. I didn't feel like arguing with her to "prove" that I used to be a super-nerd.
Gawernator 8y ago
I cold turkey quit MMO's for life too when I was 18. Realized it was time to start becoming a man. As much as I loved playing Star Wars Galaxies, or whatever it was, they're too addictive and just ruin you.
morsX 8y ago
I must have been the rare guy that binged World of Warcraft in highschool that was charismatic in the game (including the use of voice chat) but more reserved in person. I've come to grips with this and have incorporated my online persona into my real-life personality. When I made that change, I felt whole again.
Chinchilla_Rider 8y ago
Lol the hilarious thing is I had a friend who was pretty nerdy and binged WoW. He was extremely funny on voice chat and broke all his teammates rules.
A girl on his wow team was so impressed she flew down from california to "visit her grandma" in our town. Took his virginity.
I didn't take any of it seriously until I saw the girl. Super fit, hot, tight little girl who was on her hs cheer team in orange county.
Me and my friends were floored that our nerdiest buddy got this girl through wow.
Truly a twilight zone experience... will never understand fully how it happened.
EscortSportage 8y ago
not rare, i had a friend who kind of same story losing his life to Diablo 2. Kid dropped out and had to redo SR year of HS because of D2 online.
B_uckets 8y ago
"Rare" as in "almost everyone who plays online video games"?
colmatterson 8y ago
Not at all. A lot of people are shy even in online games.
[deleted] 8y ago
My leadership qualities and polarity by nature also oozed into my WoW life. Leading top guilds and arena teams at a young age. Became a fucking server celebrity. I was eventually banned due to a growing number of enemies as I black knighted and trolled my excess gear and wealth. Accumulated chat infractions from people attempting o sabotage me. Hilarious. I did go on to lead my schools Starcraft team in the college league but only started touching video games again this year as I hit another lull.
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[deleted] 8y ago
Well you're already a step up in that regard.
But seriously, pretty sure this is 90% of people on this sub.
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newmeforever 8y ago
WoW here as well.
Fucked me up socially because I played all through highschool.
Great game, but fucked my shit up!
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IamGale 8y ago
I feel so grateful to have someone try and psychoanalyst me. But I am not a sociopath, I live by values. And the main one is to add value instead of taking value away like a scammer. Getting scammed happens, it's happened to me. Shit happens. Thanks for the warning though.
Atheisticles 8y ago
Can you further explain on that last bit on scheming?
Saiserit 8y ago
Counter to common sense: Salespeople and con artists are all the more vulnerable to sales manipulations themselves. Stories abound of scammers getting scammed by bigger scammers. This is why pyramid marketing and ponzi schemes are so successful. The house always wins.
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IamGale 8y ago
Yes love seeing you on here.
aristideau 8y ago
I'm curious to watch one of your award winning videos, or is it against the rules for you to post?
IamGale 8y ago
Send me a pm because I don't want to dox myself.
TolkienAwoken 8y ago
Really really good read and story, gotta be honest though, laughed hard when RS scam forums were called the dark part of the Web
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IamGale 8y ago
Haha, at the time it felt badass for being so young.
cdtCPTret 8y ago
Scamming on RS was the best. Stealing people's years of grinding with a simple key logger at the library. Btw, I'll trim ur armor for 5k just drop it and press alt+f4
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DeltaEmerald 8y ago
So are you Nick or are you Gale?
IamGale 8y ago
My username is a reference to Ayn Rand's character Gail Waynard. But when I created the account I mispelled his name...
[deleted] 8y ago
Whats your youtube channel?
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Luckyluke23 8y ago
man great post! I love how you wrote it too. well done.
the worst part of this post was the fact I read it and I saw a little of myself in nick ( the bad years)
I was like this at one point or another in my life, and what I realised is this.
everyone tries avoid conflict at all cost. ( to some degree)
what I mean, by this is. If you are standing out on the sidelines, with EVERYONE ELSE standing out on the sidelines too, then no one really meets anyone or talks to anyone.
this is the lesson to be learned from this post!
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DownvotesCatposts 8y ago
Jesus that was awful. Thank God I scrolled to the end quickly.
clone9786 8y ago
ya, like none of this sounds bad to me aside from staying inside all the time during university
this sub is shit now, it's changed so much for the worse from a year or two ago. I never even come here any more.
[deleted] 8y ago
That Nick's name?
Albert Einstein
HumbleEngineer 8y ago
Agreed. This is Ponzi Scheme class speech. The thing is that trp doesn't need this kind of content (and I say it based on at least 3 years of lurking/commenting/incorporating some aspects of trp in my life). It doesn't need propaganda. And that's what this post is, propaganda. Seriously, this is completely unnecessary.
You are much better than this Gale, and so is trp.
(in case you have problems interpreting text, I'm not saying trp is Ponzi Scheme. The post feels like it, just that.)
[deleted] 8y ago
This entire subreddit has turned into trash. It's like a god damn AA meeting here now.
[deleted] 8y ago
This place was pretty good a year or two ago when it had half the subs. Now its just a bunch of satire and feminist shaming. Neither adds value to our lives.
rpkarma 8y ago
People have been saying that since literally a few weeks after the sub was started.
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ogrejr 8y ago
Right?
Waaah.....my friend was an awkward kid in high school.....waaah....my friend played video games to ignore his problems.....waaah...my friend moved from video games to drugs....but he's totally better nowadays. No, really.
But wait now I'm going to blow your mind by using a bold font
That loser wasnt my friend, that loser was me!!!! Omfg so deep right?
HungryLikeTheWolf99 8y ago
Amen. Young person says "OMG my life totally changed, it's such a big deal!" No, it's not. And the storytelling with the bold font lines just ruined it for me - it was like some sort of infomercial in story form.
TL;DR. Or just DR. Undergrad changed in college and thinks a you have a lot to learn from his story.
I expected the comments on this story to be ripping it apart, and frankly I'm disappointed that all these people in this sub of non-conformity are just following along with this dumb story and actually rewarding this attention/validation-seeking behavior. Yuck.
Let the hate roll in. I have lost a lot of faith in the population of this sub today.
M0RKET 8y ago
Normally I'd agree, but this guy's been posting good content recently, so I cared a bit and was able to relate. Because of who posted this I'm more forgiving than I would be otherwise. Keep going dude, I like your posts.
that1do0d 8y ago
Runescape to reddit. Nick has become a real man.
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vorverk 8y ago
"Nick was me." I saw that one coming. :) Good write up, can relate some.
Squishynishy 8y ago
This resonates so much with me. Iv wasted 5 years of my life sleeping and hiding away. Finally making the change. It's not easy, but it's happening.
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ddelicia 8y ago
This was a great read man, thank you for that.
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IamGale 8y ago
You know 10 people can give you the same advice. But you're more likely to implement the advice from the guy who you relate to the most. That's what this post does.
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p00nbrigade 8y ago
Nick don't be ashamed of your past. I wish I gave a shit enough to actually make some money playing runescape. I've been playing since 2005 and still play old school runescape to this day. I'm 22 lol
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RichieFinn 8y ago
Damnit i read the ending before i was fucking finished....
Long_Stroke 8y ago
me to man!! I highlight the post then transfer to a blank email template so its not obvious from a distance that I'm slackin off and my eye caught the last sentence.
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Captain_Self_Promotr 8y ago
A man's life from 16-21 isn't his peak. Many men spend that time searching. If you can reach TRP by age 35 you're ahead of the curve. Most men reach their stride after they are 30. The one's that peak at 18 are the worst off.
SmokedSalmon5 8y ago
I'm 18 and discovered TRP last week, feels good to wake up.
Captain_Self_Promotr 7y ago
Just remember, liberalism and anti white self hate is a female shit test. Women don't want you, a white man, to hate yourself. Take pride in your heritage and realize white skin is the best skin.
Your_Coke_Dealer 8y ago
This is a good point, but with all the "don't get married" posts, one would hope for the sake of fellow men that most of those on the sub read TRP in their 20s and use the time before their sexual peak to improve themselves. If they find it later they've found good advice before their peak but already likely fucked up
RXRob 8y ago
I've never been richer, fitter, better looking or better with women.
I'm currently 32.
If you're under 25 and reading this then I'm jealous of you. I wish I had this resource at such a young age, I'd be even further ahead of the curve at this point.
Morpheus-Man 8y ago
Thanks. 30 in a week and moving up thankfully
validstatement 8y ago
21 and implementing all of this stuff cause I want it all, now.
spacecowboyreturns 8y ago
deleted ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^0.2526 ^^^What ^^^is ^^^this?
[deleted] 8y ago
Found the trp right after my 17 birthday 10 months ago.
Chinchilla_Rider 8y ago
I think most guys find their self respect and 'get sick of women's bs' after about 5 relationships.... which for many places them around 40... sadly, these guys re-enter the dating market at a disadvantage and are often behind in life since they have been financially vampired.
I always questioned myself when all my friends were deciding to get married back around 24... 5 years later many of them still struggle to grasp the simple nature of women that many older men know.
Experience is key...
CROMAG_ 8y ago
Giving a number like that equals instant replies and karma from validation seekers
Captain_Self_Promotr 8y ago
True, but I also don't give two shits about karma so keep it coming boys.
epixs 8y ago
Found TRP at 19. 21 now, life's good.
awmace5 8y ago
Turn 20 next month. The knowledge of trp and youth combined can create a force to be reckoned with.
[deleted] 8y ago
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Sw1tch72 8y ago
Thanks for this. I'm 28 and waking up...
[deleted] 8y ago
Just slid under the wire, i found it at 35.
Corndog_Enthusiast 8y ago
I figured out that the dating game isn't as the media portrays at about age 18. Found TRP at 19, and everything made sense right off the bat. Studied and went MGTOW for nearly a year, and now I'm back in the game at 20. Thank you TRP.
boredepression 8y ago
Me at 34. Its been a year already?
[deleted] 8y ago
Just about! Trollabot says eleven months for me.
Kaijus4 8y ago
I can relate to the whole story. My story is practically identical to yours with the exception of some minor details. I broke the BP spell last year when my mother died and I left my gf of two years. Nice to see someone else go through the same path and succeed. Keep on pushing brother.
Heizenbrg 8y ago
I'm sorry for your loss man, hope that's not what it takes to change a person
Kaijus4 8y ago
Well in my case it's exactly what it took (sadly). I'm planning on writing a story similar to this with some TRP reflections in it.
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projectself 8y ago
My mom passed away the week my divorce was finalized. I am sorry for the loss you went through. That sucks. Your are correct though, nothing makes a man grow up more than going through that and coming out on the other side a better man. I look forward to reading your story.
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ValerianG 8y ago
Beautiful story man but I already knew this story was about you, kinda hard to remember so much info about another person.
IamGale 8y ago
I'm glad you caught the twist.
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GreatWhiteCuck 7y ago
I knew it! Started to realise that around the middle.
red_pill_account1 8y ago
I literally said "oh shit" out loud when I read that.
[deleted] 8y ago
The part about it that makes me sad, is that means Nick didn't even have that one good guy friend who was there to listen.
BillNyeDeGrasseTyson 8y ago
Good writer indeed, but I was pretty sure about 1/3rd through.
boscoist 8y ago
Yea, there are a few references out of place that jarred me out of the 'my friend' part.
IamGale 8y ago
Thank you I appreciate that, especially from you dude!
booomhorses 8y ago
I knew it was you when you mentioned reddit. Still great story!
Pelikahn 8y ago
Read to the end and didn't know until I was told, nice writing man.
EscapedTheMatrix 8y ago
Same. Right about the part where he mentioned Seddit, I figured. No less enjoyable though. A good read.
redditdawg11 8y ago
I was about to say, that was fantastic, really moved me.
Atheisticles 8y ago
Thank you so much for this post.
I've got so much to learn.
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FuriousBeans 8y ago
Reminds me of the song the river runs deep.
Whisper 8y ago
This is important to understand.
Cool people aren't cool because they do cool things. They're cool because they do what the fuck they want, and the things they do are cool because they do them with zero apology or shame.
If you just got here, and you do nothing but stay in your cave playing world of warcraft, the problem isn't that you like a video game. It's that you don't do anything else, and that you're probably doing just that because there are lots of things you wish you could do, but are afraid to.
Don't give up the things you enjoy. Just make room for the things you've never tried.
IamGale 8y ago
And you get the BEST feeling in the world when you apply this. Because when you start doing the things you used to wish you could do your mind explodes. Always yield to your dreams.
Mindcrime2015 8y ago
This. This. This, a hundred fucking times this. I stupidly pissed away over a decade of my life playing video games and went from an amazing social life to almost becoming a recluse. Video games in and of themselves are not bad and provide a helpful and sometimes necessary escape. But doing them to the exclusion of actually living your life is a horrible fucking waste.
Shamlei 8y ago
Honestly starting to think videogames are useless the more I'm growing.
18 now, 5 when I first touched a game, hooked and played everyday since I was 6-7, Half destroyed social life (been playing the "class clown" card since I was 8 basically).
You don't need that outlet, trust me (and that's coming from someone who used to play games all night and day and has a 215games steam account).
If something is wrong in your life or you feel stressed, just meditate while listening to alpha binaural waves, do that for 5-10 minutes and all the anxiety just goes away, then after that you're free to go and work on your hobby and create something.
^this is the best and only "escape" you need, it's ridiculous how powerfull it is (and it's coming from someone who never did meditation before), with that tool you can let go of any stress relievers that you overuse like alcohol, drugs, porn, masturbation ect....
Next time you want to boot up your game, try 10 minutes of this before playing and see if playing was really needed after that.
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EdvardMunch 8y ago
I don't have a brother, I ate the pudding, I ate shit pudding!
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bodiwait 8y ago
throughout the whole post I was thinking
wow it would be neat if nick was actually.. and you went there hhahah
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TopKekSkye 8y ago
I'm you before the bad shit started OP, sports at school, gaming at home...
IamGale 8y ago
I hope you're handling it better than I did.
[deleted] 8y ago
Joe Rogan is your role model? No offense but he's seriously a fucking retard.
cynicalprick01 8y ago
yea, it is pretty sad to me.
dude calls himself TRP's psych guy, but doesnt know anything at all about psychology.
imo, it is his kind of fluffy verbose writing that is bringing the overall quality of this sub down.
IamGale 8y ago
Joe Rogan is a badass. I will not apologize for that. He keeps it real, isn't afraid to talk about hallucinogenics, has guests with left and right political views. The guy is amazing.
His podcast was one of the first things I discovered that really pushed me to improve myself.
[deleted] 8y ago
He maybe an alpha male but he's seriously just a confident idiot
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redzorp 8y ago
You sound more than a little jelly...
Rogan is in amazing shape, with two black belts in different styles of Brazilian Jiu Jitsu (Machado/Gracie and 10th Planet) and another black belt in Tae Kwon Do, an art in which he was a national champion. In fact, he taught George St. Pierre an awesome back kick that GSP used to great effect in his fights. GSP said that Rogan had some of the best kicks he's ever seen.
And we could go on....he's a multi millionaire from all his media gigs and stand up comedy. He hunts his own meat with a crossbow. He owns his own sensory deprivation tank and uses powerful psychedelics for personal evolution. He hangs with major celebrities, sports figures and intellectuals. He hosts the most interesting and informative podcast in the world with over 20 million listeners...
In short, Joe Rogan is living the kind of redpill life that most people on this sub would kill for.
So no offense, but I think it is YOU who is the fucking retard.
Grow up.
cynicalprick01 8y ago
dude, you just argued that rogan isnt a retard by talking about everything other than his intelligence, which is what a retardation diagnosis is based on.
sure, you may like the guy, he may be alpha and successful, but that does not make him smart.
redzorp 8y ago
Listen to his podcasts. He's smart.
TheSlicemanCometh 8y ago
3 blackbelts, 3 jobs (all of them incredibly unique), entrepreneur, constantly exposing himself to new challenges physically and mentally despite having enough money (20 or 30 million) to sit back on a beach for the rest of his life, amazing shape at 50yo....
Uh, if thats not role-model worthy, then Im not sure what is.
[deleted] 8y ago
Amazing shape? He fucked his shoulders because he doesn't know shit about lifting and used weights way to big for him. Also his head looks like a bloated pumpkin from all that HGH he used over the years. Seriously google young Joe Rogan you'll see what his head used to look like.
About the blackbelts part: his fighting record is like 0-2-1 or something like that in kickboxing? And I wouln't consider him an expert of fighting in any form since he called Rousey an "elite kickboxer" many times.
I don't want to undermine his achievements but he seriously has a following of young people that eat up his bullshit and don't notice what an idiot he is. There are countless examples I could mention but I don't want to be hatin'
TheSlicemanCometh 8y ago
Joe Rogan is not in good shape for a 50yo because he got injured lifting.
Joe Rogan does not have three blackbelts because he lost in a separate sport.
Joe Rogan is not a good commentator because he made a mistake once.
You are a paragon of logic.
Google non sequitur.
cynicalprick01 8y ago
oh god, how about you google straw man, because he never said any of those things
seriously, even you change your own claim from "amazing shape" to "good shape" in your rebuttal.
dude, you are the one who needs to re-evaluate your logic.
NikolaiVuhg 8y ago
Mother fucker.... I am Nick. This is scary accurate... I lucky only last 3 years in that game. I let my friend of 2 years that I met on the game play on my account and he dropped all of my items. He later told me he did it because he was jealous of my success in the game. Trust no one. Thanks for the post
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abhigeek 8y ago
| Nick wasn't my best friend. Nick was me
Sounds like a fight club
IamGale 8y ago
Yeah I thought it was a good way to end it.
Dookiestain_LaFlair 8y ago
Ultima Online was way better than Runescape. You could actually kill people and take all their items so you didn't need to scam people out of anything. Then they made the non-pvp world and ruined the whole game.
p00nbrigade 8y ago
Scamming people was part of the fun though.
Dookiestain_LaFlair 8y ago
Not as much fun as gating Noobs to the 3rd floor of Deceit or using a bug to break into houses and loot them bare.
sweetgene05 8y ago
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QblkQ-J6zio
deepfrench 8y ago
Too self absorbed little snowflake. But hey you're young, it's okay to think that what you went thru is bad.
Seriously though, pull your head out of ur ass.
IamGale 8y ago
Don't compare me with people who've had it way worse. We all have our pasts and this is mine.
The_Iron_Sea 8y ago
ITT: The world's best gamers of days past
[deleted] 8y ago
Christ, your story nearly mirrors mine.
While I didn't play any sports or even have any sort of social standing in high school, I spent the years of 13-21 wasting my potential on the same exact game that you did.
Got to college, got into a relationship. Got burned. Found TRP. Used the anger and hopelessness to fix my bad habits and to start implementing good ones. Where I used to spend my days mindlessly plugging away to gain experience points in such a boring game, now I spend my days learning new things, practicing things, improving my physical strength, and generally just loving life.
MMOs are a fucking disease. The video game topic is brought up here from time to time - is it okay to play them?
My answer is that as long as the vast majority of your time is spent productively, and you aren't coming from a background where games have ever been problematic for you, then sure, play a game if you want as long as it isn't a fucking MMO. Play a game that has an outcome, a winner/loser aspect, instead. Where MMOs are Skinner's boxes, competitive games like chess or poker at least give you some sort of strategic interaction with other humans.
A game like Runescape is designed purposefully to steal your time, and therefore, your life. Why spend all that time on a fictional character that will be long gone when you are forced to grow up and get a job, or when the developers fuck up the game and you end up quitting, or when their company eventually goes under?
Lesson learned? Make good choices.
What's a good choice? A choice with a higher ROI than the alternatives. Games inherently have poor ROI. If you must play one, pick one with the highest ROI like chess or poker.
[deleted] 8y ago
I get into the "should I stop playing video games?" Argument all the time with myself. The end is that I can't seem to find anything else better to do so I justify it as that I enjoy it. My day is legitimately wake up go to the gym eat and game.
I don't think it matters but my current vice is factorio and dota 2.
I always keep coming back to video games because it's very inexpensive for a high rate of entertainment. When I was last backpacking I didn't bring any entertainment devices for the slow periods and I'd end up burning a hundred or two dollars to kill the boredom.
[deleted] 8y ago
My brother plays MMO's and Magic the Gathering. Love the kid but he is about 100lbs over weight, has zero aspirations in life, and zero experience with the ladies.
IamGale 8y ago
This is super succinct. I like how you get down to the crux of the argument.
[deleted] 8y ago
When we purposely make choices that are objectively worse than the alternatives, we are falling victim to the emotional indoctrination that is the blue pill.
It's really that simple.
TommyTheThird 8y ago
Seriously. If I could go back I'd tell myself to stop playing RS.
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ControlBlue 8y ago
Most of those are made with Skinner's Boxes in mind. There are some rare exceptions like EVE Online where you have to be social and you have to earn whatever you get in them; alongside dealing with economics and cold-hard real-life value. You can learn some really useful stuffs in that game, especially about how ruthless people can be if they are allowed to.
But those are an exception nowadays; most games are made to cater to the lowest denominator, and that is the billions of betas around on this planet.
[deleted] 8y ago
Absolutely.
Most games are not meant to be played, they're meant to be incorporated into your lifestyle. They're designed so that you continue playing regardless of whether you're enjoying yourself or not.
Fuck that.
UniversalFapture 8y ago
Experiences like this is what kills us inside. It cuts and chips away at us. Day in. Day out. Until we crack. Some of us go crazy and some of us just give up.
These experiences alter our lives and shape us into the men we are today. Or the men we are becoming.
Will I stop playing video games? No, never. If i feel like protecting Ellie from the clickers or fighting off a grizzly with Lara, or catching an episode of Planet Earth, that's what I'm going to do. Regardless of what anyone thinks.
These old tendencies... That's what keeps us separate. It's what stops us from being just big buff meatheads.
You don't have to go with the norm. But don't let your hobbies consume you, either. As long as you lift, stay clean, get out and get some fresh air, your good to go.
TRP makes you a better man. But not having a mind of your own makes you no better than another beta drone.
BlackJ1 8y ago
That ending really got me. I'm just glad to hear you found TRP and began to make changes in life.
Good luck Nick.
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Meat-on-the-table 8y ago
Nice Tyler Durden-ing.
Here is the disconnect for a lot of men of significant stature: no matter what you look likem you always have to create something. Women get praised simply for how hot they are, but for a man, the application for this has a far narrower scope.
A woman gets praised for basically nothing. A man has to do things worthy of praise.
IFuckingHateAllergy 8y ago
It is often cited that men are naturally encumbered by the " burden of performance". I see it as a gift. Unlike women who's value is often measured through their depreciating looks.
We, as men, got it good. Our value is determined by our success, what we create, and what more we have to offer. Our potential value has no theoretical limit, for it is forever, oh so malleable
IamGale 8y ago
Thank you, I went all fight club there at the end.
Agreed I love creating now.
PissedPajamas 8y ago
I understand where you're coming from with video game obsessions, I was a fat little shit not too long ago (4 years back) wasting my life away with oldschool runescape and grinding my range mage pure. It was my life, I lived and breathe runescape. The one thing that got me out of that phase was lifting and im still doing it till this day. It's much harder than grinding exp on the computer but it feels pretty good when a girl touches my chest and squeezes my arm.
I still occasionally play runescape but I have bots leveling me up as well cause who has time for that shit? I've got school, work, responsibilities and a social life to keep me busy.
It's all about balance
IamGale 8y ago
Yes me and you are so similar. I was all about the bots and now I'm very much into fitness. About to hit the gym soon.
PissedPajamas 8y ago
Go get that 99 strength cape irl my son
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[deleted] 8y ago
Shit bro. You have pretty much the exact story as me. Runescaper...made runescape videos and had my first taste of success and validation... Now hustling and living life on own terms (while consuming self-improvement entrepreneurial podcasts/books).
Send me a PM if you wish to get deeper into this. I won't be surprised at all if we knew each other from a past time from the runescape video community, and it'd be incredible to find someone from my past, going on the same journey as me here.
juliman17 8y ago
same train here. 180+ days on that game. changed my life high school life completely. glad i learned from that
zenhoodman 8y ago
TRP has given me so much clarity! Thanks for the post. It can be so healthy to write about where we struggled in life! Never stop improving!
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creativecontrol 8y ago
Great twist ending. Had me clapping in approval.
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bea5tly 8y ago
Damn that plot twist at the end. I remember Runescape I got banned to for having a mafia of scammers lmao. #goodoldays
herrazki 8y ago
I enjoyed reading your story from the begining to the ending You are an inspiration
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[deleted] 8y ago
I needed this, I had sworn off online games but decided to give one, Payday a go yesterday. It's a slippery horse.
IamGale 8y ago
For me, cheat days work really well for diets. For MMOs... well it didn't work so well. Find your balance.
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Dustin_Bromain 8y ago
Lol, my name is also Nick and I too was addicted to runescape. Put countless hours of my childhood into that game. Hilarious. Excellent story OP. So glad to see you here.
IamGale 8y ago
Man you too?! It was a popular game and thank you.
Dustin_Bromain 8y ago
Yeah it's a fun game, not going to lie, but going to the gym with my new hot LTR is just so much better. Lol
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Surfac3 8y ago
This this sounds exactly like me..... only im married and have a 5 year old. At 28......
[deleted] 8y ago
Wow this hit home. I hid my WoW life from even other WoW players at school and barely fit in. Drugs alcohol, etc. mostly stoner crowd but I was known wit the athletes due to my elementary association and being a normal good looking guy.
I had over 350 days (DAYS * 24 hours) logged into WoW and they banned me eventually. Best thing to ever happen to me.
Mindcrime2015 8y ago
In high school, my group and I played ad&d from 15 to 19. I went away to college in my 20's and learned to love outdoor sports. Fishing and Hunting FTW! Starting traveling in my late 20's early 30's and became somewhat of a social butterfly. Married a girl who played Everquest. A. Lot. Ended up with 15 months time played on my main and another 12 months on my alts. Switched over to WOW on day 1. (Wife was in the beta) Played on and off, gaining another couple of years of time played in between bouts of swearing it off. Finally quit for good after being banned last year. Best thing that happened to me. I feel like a fucking heroin addict when I reflect on how much of my life was wasted playing RPG's/MMORG's.
IamGale 8y ago
I love how we both got banned and it both helped us. Crazy how things work.
[deleted] 8y ago
It also led to my first girlfriend where I had difficulty getting it up when I lost my virginity with her. Luckily, similar to the ban, she dumped me after my first year of uni and I craved affection which led me to seddit and banging uni girls for 2 years, then TRP, which led to a prestigious internship for a year off, then a final year of dismissing most of the stereotypical uni life for my education and a few plates.
However I am now at a lull where I went to a grad school program that seemed underwhelming and am looking to go back to my original career plans from my uni/internship days. I feel trapped in a grad school house instead of my own apartment going into debt for car payments etc. Losing another year of my life here... But I still lift, have plates and stay off the booze except for 1-2 times a month to to mess around downtown like anyone my age.
Problem is i found designer drugs/research chemicals and am just now ending a path of abusing adderall like stimulants that either made me a productive job networking beast or Starcraft no sleep god.... I'm glad you have found your career. Hopefully I'm able to not fuck up one of these interviews (last phone interview I said more than necessary and actually swore on the phone. Probably due to being stimmed up).
So. Many. Traps.
I just woke up from a 16 hour sleep since cold turkeying the drugs to your post.
IamGale 8y ago
Dude good for you. I've also done a lot work on stims. I've gone on and off them and I have a pretty good balance with them right now.
Going cold turkey is brutal. Best of luck.
Frost30 8y ago
I want to thank you for the post. I saved it instantly and I will read this again and again. You're taking care of yourself and we all have had our challenges and BP times. I'm starting to feel the effects of the RP every day and it's like medication I think and it's slowly changing my thinking for the good.
Take it easy sir.
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jerkMEthenMERKme 8y ago
That was beautiful :') Thank you Nick
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PantsonFire1234 8y ago
You're writing style is very good man, if you're still 21 then that's fucking impressive. You appear to be on the emotional side but don't let that discourage you- just something you could consider adjusting.
I think the biggest mistake guys make is they buy into the hoax of popularity and girls. They want it all so badly that the pressure gets to them. It's like getting a blackout during a presentation- except that life itself is the presentation. Just don't give a fuck and laugh at your failures and celebrate the success.
People shouldn't feel bad if they played some online game allot in their youth. Most guys do it, even Chad. Me and my bro got heavily into Call of Duty 4 for a period of 4 years. And we even played WoW hardcore for almost 2. That last one bothered people while the other left them unfazed- it's all just social stigma.
Me and my little brother were always good socially and with girls. All be it with different personalities. If you played Runescape for some time you aren't a loser. You're just like us and any other typical guy.
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The_Game_Delegate 8y ago
As much as TRP might talk about 30 and so being a man's peak, and as true as it might actually be on paper, the best memories and best experiences are had in those younger years. I get laid a lot more now than I ever did in high school or college but it hardly means that much to me. The best memories are created at 16, 18, and 21 when you're around so many people your age and experiencing the fun moments with them. Ya, you might not get laid that night but damn that night out with a few good friends was amazing in college. After college, it all sort of changes and you aren't around as many young energetic and fun loving people anymore.
OP, you may have missed out on in high school but luckily you got it together in your early 20s.
[deleted] 8y ago
Fuckin' hell bro, that sounds like me too. Hope you keep crushin' it bro we're all rooting for you.
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IamGale 8y ago
Those runescape days. Crazy time.
TheRedStoic 8y ago
"Nick was me"
I had a feeling.
I'm glad you shared this with us. Please keep writing, please keep giving advice.
IamGale 8y ago
Thanks dude, good to see you in the comments again.
TheRedStoic 8y ago
I've been busy. Life is... Like a bitch. A lovely near unicorn bitch.
But it's killing my free time. (we all must sacrifice) Right? Anyway keep it up. If you need something message me privately. I still prioritize my cohort.
I will continue following you until you head the wrong direction. (if ever)
Frigzy 8y ago
Is it?
I mean I get what you're saying but if all of us truly lived what we preached wouldn't we like.. not be here?
Your comment made me wonder that, and yes I do know I am guilty as charged.
PS: video games are the lethal ingredient in the pussyfication of our society...
bittr_n_swt 8y ago
fucking brilliant, i had a feeling nick was you...the detail was very strong here.
glad you made it to the other side, now life begins
[deleted] 8y ago
i had bad luck with minoxidil .. got some troubling side effects. Hows finasteride work for you?
IamGale 8y ago
Working well for me atm, but I haven't been taking it for long enough to give you conclusive results.
rave_n 8y ago
I've been on it a little over 3 months and I already improved. Miracle drug.
SmilingWatermelon 8y ago
Nick, you've been on a roll with all these amazing posts man. Keep it up and keep moving forward. Im really proud of how far you've come.
You are now a role model for us here at TRP.
This is your home now. I hope youll be here to stay brother.
Also to respond to your other message, yeah as soon as I stop hamstering my approaches ill definitely post some FRs.
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[deleted] 8y ago
Runescape was everything until i turned 17. I made money off runescape to pay for my first car.
I can relate on so many levels, but im glad that i was able to keep a good amount of friends. Never cared for popularity but always had it. Now at 19 i still play runescape but all i can think about is money. Its like a childhood game that still is apart of me because it was my childhood.
IamGale 8y ago
That's impressive cash. We're you farming gold or selling accs?
[deleted] 8y ago
I farmed gold/sold accounts/gambled/dungeoneering.
Used to have a 20+ bot farm. Sold my main account and hacked it back twice. Gambled when dicing + flowering was allowed. Owned dungeoneering fc's.
IamGale 8y ago
Okay you win. That's next level stuff.
mellojumper 8y ago
Great story but the Mayan thing is not even close to a conspiracy.
TheSlicemanCometh 8y ago
Very good read and quality post. Thanks.
[deleted] 8y ago
I saw nothing wrong, most black chicks are ugly and you should consider a job in sales. Nothing wrong with hustling.
[deleted] 8y ago
Tfw maxed at 14, comped at 15. Tfw wasted so much time of my life.
Luckily, like you, I decided I had to step my shit up.
I also had severe ED the first 3 times I tried to have sex, still do sometimes, I can relate to your life on a whole nother level than I usually can when I read posts.
IamGale 8y ago
I've been there and like you know what it's like... ED sucks. But now I've after getting better with girls, it's mostly gone. I stopped fapping to porn and that helped a lot.
[deleted] 8y ago
Same here, glad you found out that not fapping to porn helps. I still get it occasionally since I don't hook-up regularily, so I'm not accustomed to being naked around many women (steady somewhat exclusive FWB for over a year).
fingers144 8y ago
Haha, Runescape. around 175 Days played of bittersweet memories. Good for you man
DexterousRichard 8y ago
Good job pulling through, man.
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IamGale 8y ago
What mistake? I'm not sure?
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IamGale 8y ago
Oh...To be brief, the mistake was that for 5 years the guy just went with the flow instead of following his own path.
Marr0w1 8y ago
Man this really strikes a chord. I was nowhere near that extreme I don't think, but still my biggest regret now is how many years of my life I wasted because I was just ghosting. Now I've had a lot of friends die, my gaming is almost zero, and I try get the most out of every day. But thinking back to how many years I wasted, it feels like a lifetime.
IamGale 8y ago
I know your pain. When I think back to how much more I could have gotten out of life. But every day, I'm grateful because I'm doing everything I can right now to be the best I can be.
And when you think about it. All we have is this moment.
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El_Serpiente_Roja 8y ago
Wow , this made me want to hit the gym.
Congrats brother, one day/step at a time. We're gunna make it !!
Also, I like how you have dispersed bolded points to break up the story into sections.
IamGale 8y ago
Thank you, it's popular blogging technique.
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turmukai 8y ago
5 years is nothing. You have learned a lot. Good job!
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Fuck_shadow_bans 8y ago
ZOMG IT'S LIKE INCEPTION AND FIGHT CLUB ALL IN ONE!
MakeEmSayAyy 8y ago
Nobody game to Nick's birthday party
Nick no:(
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OYeahThatWorks 8y ago
I just cant read any of your posts til the end, they are tldr
IamGale 8y ago
It's not for you man and that's okay.
Sw1tch72 8y ago
Thanks for the post. Interesting read. I'm new to all of this, but it's oddly inspiring. I'm 28 and sick of a lot of my BP ways. Time for some change.
IamGale 8y ago
My pleasure and absolutely dude, go for it!
TheStumblingWolf 8y ago
Oooh nice plot twist. Thank you for sharing, it was very interesting to read.
I was a lot like you. I knew there was a huge part of life that I simply didn't understand (social stuff mostly). I lost about 10 years of my life because I followed and agreed to get a house with my ex and her family. I eventually ended up living in sort of a black hole. When people asked me how I was doing I just kinda shrugged and said "fine". When people ask now I usually say "fantastic" and mean it. I didn't know life could feel like this. Sometimes I'm high on life for more than a week because I love my life now. It's incredible.
TRP has basically fixed every lacking aspect of my life, and those that aren't fixed yet are well on their way.
IamGale 8y ago
Man that's a beautiful story thank you for sharing. Me and you are so similar. I know exactly that feeling of going along with shitty decisions. We both left that life and we can't go back.
Heizenbrg 8y ago
Videogame addiction Is the worst.
At least when you're drinking and doing light drugs you're social, but being on your own gaming creates a bubble that makes it hard to escape.
Once everything around you seems mediocre and not worth pursuing you know you got a problem.
IamGale 8y ago
Yea it's deadly. I ended up moving on from RS to Call of Duty and then just fizzling out from there.
[deleted] 8y ago
Drinking and drugs can lead to issues with the law however. Video games can't.
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Antriton 8y ago
MAN that was awesome. Way to go bro.
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samzplourde 8y ago
I had a shockingly similar experience, and I think I'm in that college phase. This post is incredibly inspiring and I respect the honesty and courage in this post. A couple months ago, I dropped playing runescape, I've played well over 10,000 hours on it over 10+ years and I realize now how strongly it can suck you in. I would completely blow off assignments in school and just sit at home playing runescape. Now that I'm in college, I would be in class playing runescape instead of listening and taking notes. The problem isn't specific to this game of course, or even games in general, but I feel like one of the most important things in life, especially as a developing young person, is to improve yourself as a person before you can go and have fun.
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IamGale 8y ago
We have a lot in common. You're clearly on your way man.
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IamGale 8y ago
Hmm, probably just feeling like shit every day. And having dreams of being the Rock haha. And getting started with 5x5, it's super easy to follow and the app makes it stupidly simple.
DyatAss 8y ago
I was that kid to a T in high school, I even scammed people for their runescape accounts.....no joke. I was never used to getting attention from girls, mainly because I grew up in a extremely religious home in which sex and partying was considered extremely sinful. My only saving grace was going to college and having girls randomly hit on my because I'm super tall, and apparently Channing Tatum like (I hate when girls say this). I started treating this attention as my new "game," and quickly became hooked. Just as I did in my runescape days, I would use control/manipulation tactics to gain control (sleep) with these girls. I went from 0-70ish partners in about 4 years...all because I traded one addiction for another.
This post really captured my attention, and I agree with the basic premise: "live by your own plan right now," but I strongly encourage people to really think about what they want in life. I thought that hooking up with tons of girls would make me feel cool/happy, but when it comes down to it, I'm still feeling like the runescape kid I was in high school.
IamGale 8y ago
Wow, we have such a similar story. Sounds like you've done well.
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icouldhavehaditall 8y ago
Fantastic, and great job on the progress! You write really well so it was a fun read too.
IamGale 8y ago
Thank you! I appreciate that.
[deleted] 8y ago
Wow high school kids bought a bus and one kid drinking an entire bottle of tequila, would never guess.
IamGale 8y ago
I know we were so original.
bloodfoxtrue 8y ago
Kinda saw the twist coming, but am nonetheless delighted for you man. Inspiring!
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raydid 8y ago
I can relate to some parts. But how do you 'express yourself better'?
IamGale 8y ago
Toastmasters and study copywriting
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IamGale 8y ago
What an interesting way to end a gaming addiction.
[deleted] 8y ago
My god, you really do/did have some issues.
very nice story
Djashesofrussia 8y ago
I've wasted 12 years on RS. 500 days played logged. Almost trimmed my comp cape. All is garbage. Ill never touch a game again. I was an elite veteran with a rank in the hundreds. I was addicted to it. As you can imagine, my social life was destroyed.
Jonathan_Rambo 8y ago
The 'ol Fight Club switcheroo.
PowerMasterLord 8y ago
I knew this was a story about you. Also, I've been glad to see your articles this past week. It's good shit!
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Adeus_Ayrton 8y ago
I guessed the ending from the first paragraph.
De te fabula narratur
vezokpiraka 8y ago
Wtf did I just read? How can you get so sad over getting drunk? People do this here constantly from 14 to 110
IamGale 8y ago
Highschool drama knows no limits...