The Reality

Toxic masculinity is a shit test.

Women want to know if their man can handle his shit -- his life, his stress, his work, his trials and tribulations, and -- most importantly -- her and her children. This is his sexual fitness as provider. But how to find out if the man can do these things?

Why not make up a phrase that could be parroted as the root cause for all issues that are even tangentially related to men? This would help to remove the onus of responsibility from women.

It would also be great if this phrase could be used to shame any male trait or expression of masculinity that goes counter to the interest of women. This would help to assert control over masculinity that is "troublesome" from a feminine viewpoint.

And what if this phrase, when accepted by the man as a solution to his problems, would openly divulge his own poor sexual fitness without the woman even having to lift a finger? This phrase would be the ultimate litmus test for sexual fitness, with the men who accept this principle snitching on themselves.

This phrase is "toxic masculinity" and it is a shit test.

The Solution

You don't go to your women with your most troubling problems trying to find solace or solutions. You cultivate male relationships with men who are trustworthy and have your interest first and foremost. This is your "bro council". To cultivate a bro council, you also need to show interest in assisting your bros with their problems -- and I do not mean you try to red pill them. They should already be fairly red pilled, and any amount of blue pill that is left can be gently dealt with.

When you have a problem, you go to your bro council to shoot the shit and try to find solutions to your problems. Your bro council will not give you the solution, but they will give you perspective; you will have to find the solution. Your bro council must be made up of men who are trustworthy and not a part of your work or any group over which you have a dominant position. If you are a part owner of a company or a manager, you do not go to your underlings for advice or talk about your woes. You go to your underlings with solutions.

The same goes for women. You can divulge the fact that something was difficult, but you must always indicate the solution. You do not cry. That's the difference between the man-child in his 30s and the man who has his shit under control.

Example: I lost my mother not too long ago to cancer. She was pretty young, and I am fairly young for not having a mother. When I told my current LTR about this, I did not cry about my mom being gone; I told her that she is gone, and I expressed that I had to work through that tough time, but I came through it just fine by working through my shit. She expressed that she liked that I didn't use the death of my mom as a crutch for any problems in my life; which is what she sees many people do. That instead I had come to terms with it and moved on with life.

This is what women want: men who handle their shit and grow stronger. They do not want to be the one having to facilitate you coming to terms with your shit.

Conclusion

There should be no confusion over this phrase and its intended uses. Further, there should be no questions like "why do women say they want us to show emotion but then ghost once we do just that -- women are so fickle and confusing".

It's not confusing. It's not a mystery. It's a shit test.