Most of you are not ready for LTRs.

That's right.

Go to AskTRP and it seems like half the questions are about problems they are having with their LTRs.

In my opinion, LTRs are somewhat of the final boss of TRP. Similar to the final boss of an RPG video game. What do you need to defeat the final boss in an RPG? A ton of experience in various facets. Fighting the final boss in an RPG without the needed experience will result in a crushing defeat, and LTRs are no exception.

What do I define as a successful LTR? A successful LTR isn't one that lasts. A successful LTR is one in which the man holds frame and does not become a doormat over the duration of the relationship. The problem is so many men are so thirsty and so invested in their LTR, that they make sacrifices and compromises, and turn into a doormat for the woman to walk all over him, just in an attempt to keep her happy. Yeah, the relationship may continue, but at what cost? A lot of the AskTRP posts, sadly, have this dynamic, even if they don't outright say it.

I think the LTR failures I see in the TRP community are rooted in 2 core issues.

  • One, is when the man is in an LTR before being red pilled, then becomes red pilled, and tries to retroactively shoehorn red pill principles into his existing LTR. This is a recipe for failure, because you have already poisoned the well with your non red pilled behavior in the LTR prior to being red pilled. Any attempts at injecting red pilled principles into the LTR will be met with resistance, because it will come across as fake and try hard. Chances are the LTR is already a lost cause because you already are a doormat, and she doesn't respect you. Once you are a doormat, there is no undoing it. If you are in an LTR and them stumble onto TRP, terminate the LTR. You can't undo the blue pilled behavior that has put you in a position of permanent weakness. A red pilled LTR can only succeed when its red pilled from the beginning.

  • Two, is when the man becomes red pilled, then tries to use his new red pill knowledge to immediately jump into an LTR right off the bat, instead of playing the field, spinning plates, and generating abundance. This is also a recipe for failure, because as I pointed out in the intro, its like going straight to the final boss in a video game without working your way up to it. You aren't experienced enough, you aren't equipped enough, you're going to lose. I believe men who get red pilled and immediately try to jump into an LTR with the first girl they see is almost always done out of a lack of abundance, lack of knowledge, and oneitis.

I am a firm believer in the 25/25/25 rule when it comes to LTRs.

  • At least 25 months(2 years) of being red pilled. Minimum.

  • You are at least 25 years old

  • You have banged at least 25 different women.

If you meet these 3 criteria, you might be ready for an LTR. If you don't? Do what you want. But you are setting yourself up for eventual failure. Don't come crying here when shit hits the fan.

The 2 year minimum rule is important. My grasp of TRP knowledge 2 months after being red pilled in 2014 was different from my grasp of TRP knowledge in 2015 a year after, and in 2016 two years after, and in 2017 three years after, and so on. You are constantly learning and gaining knew knowledge. 5 years in for me and I still learn new things.

The 25 year old requirement is self explanatory. You shouldn't be committing to a woman at a young age, play the field. Don't restrict yourself. Also, maturity. Women will respect an older man more, you are at a disadvantage trying to make an LTR work at a young age.

The 25 n-count requirement I think is the most important and is non negotiable. When you have fucked a lot of women, you learn an important virtue - women ain't shit, and no one woman is special. You learn that all women have downsides, and things about them that are not appealing. It helps you not put women on a pedestal. It helps you learn the true nature of women. And it allows you to know what you want. How would you know vanilla is your favorite flavor of ice cream, if you have never eaten chocolate or strawberry? Why would you commit to an LTR in a woman when you haven't sampled the field and you don't know exactly what you want in a long term relationship?

The 25 n count rule is important mostly because it teaches you abundance. Abundance is the core, central tenet to living a red pilled life. If you haven't experienced abundance, you are not truly a red pilled man. Abundance unlocks red pill nirvana and allows you to see things much more clearly. I think the abundance right of passage is when you have repeat sex with 3 different women in the span of a week. AKA, you fuck 3 women you have already fucked before in the span of a week. That's when you earn your abundance merit badge. I do not see how a "red pilled" man can have a successful LTR when he has not experienced a period of abundance in his sex life. Having a harem of women who will have sex with you at your whim is an antidote to pedestalizing one woman.

Once you are mature enough, once you are wise enough, once you are experienced enough, and once you have successfully experienced abundance, then you might be ready for an LTR. But, its not easy. I attempted my first red pill LTR about 4 years in. It was not easy. I couldn't imagine attempting it without the necessary experience or wisdom needed. I almost certainly would have become a doormat.

The most challenging part of an LTR is even if you do everything right - keep up a good appearance, take care of yourself, eat right, hold frame, run dread, and all of that - the woman is always going to be attempting to gain the upper hand in the relationship. You will deal with a non stop barrage of shit tests, comfort tests, whining, and nagging. In order to navigate these seas, you need the following arrows in your quiver:

  • The notion that this woman is not special and is replaceable. Most men fail here because they LTR'ed her out of oneitis, so she has been pedestalized past the point of no return in his mind. Avoiding oneitis is a hell lot easier said than done and requires extensive experience, seasoning and willpower.

  • The willingness to put your foot down and say no. Most men fail here because they are afraid if they make her mad she will leave, due to their lack of abundance and options. Since she represents 100% of his supply of pussy, its either be a doormat, or she leaves.

  • The will to walk away. Most men say they are willing to walk, but how many would actually follow through with it if needed? Women are in tune creatures, they can sense when a men is so invested he would never walk away from the relationship. They know. And they will use that to their advantage. Man -> Doormat

  • The perfect balance of dread game. Dread game is a tricky subject because too much dread is just as much of a thing as too little dread. Too much dread, or dread that is too obvious and not subtle enough, will lead to a wave of comfort tests that you will ultimately end up being tripped up by. Dread game is a learned skill. The best dread game is subtle and not blatant. Dread is implied. If you are actively trying to "dread" her, you are trying too hard and being too obvious.

If you can successfully arm yourself with those 4 things, your LTR might have a shot at success. But the issue with those 4 things, is that they are all learned weapons via experience outside of LTRs. You can not just read about them and apply them and expect to have them work for you right off the bat.

That's my write up on LTRs. No doubt AskTRP will continue to be flooded with LTR questions from men who aren't ready for them. And no doubt this post will be replied to from guys thinking their situation is special, their unicorn is special, this doesn't apply to them, and they know better. That's fine. Like I said, this isn't a rule or requirement, do what you want. I'm just trying to help you all understand what it truly takes to have a successful red pilled LTR. If you want your LTR to work for you, and not be a constant source of agony and stress and disappointment, it might be best to adhere to my advice. Don't come crying to me or AskTRP when you ignore it all thinking you know better and then your LTR train runs off the tracks, crashes and burns.

Don't become an LTR doormat.