From The Atlantic:
The Bored Sex
Women, more than men, tend to feel stultified by long-term exclusivity—despite having been taught that they were designed for it.
Although most people in sexual partnerships end up facing the conundrum biologists call “habituation to a stimulus” over time, a growing body of research suggests that heterosexual women, in the aggregate, are likely to face this problem earlier in the relationship than men. And that disparity tends not to even out over time. In general, men can manage wanting what they already have, while women struggle with it.
Marta Meana of the University of Nevada at Las Vegas spelled it out simply in an interview with me at the annual Society for Sex Therapy and Research conference in 2017. “Long-term relationships are tough on desire, and particularly on female desire,” she said. I was startled by her assertion, which contradicted just about everything I’d internalized over the years about who and how women are sexually. Somehow I, along with nearly everyone else I knew, was stuck on the idea that women are in it for the cuddles as much as the orgasms, and—besides—actually require emotional connection and familiarity to thrive sexually, whereas men chafe against the strictures of monogamy.
I think the implications are pretty straightforward here.
The unicorn life with the unicorn woman is just not possible, and it's no one's fault.
The traditional ways suppressed these desires, but they were always there.
You can stem the tide by keeping things less "comfortable", but the tide moves only in one direction: boredom with the same man You can be an alpha, you can do everything you need to be doing, but you can't simultaneously be another person!
It's just your turn. Enjoy it. Recognize its impermanence and don't take it personally.
We ain't nothing but mammals.