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- Hide Preview | 396 Comments | submitted 2 months ago by Pharmpharm7 [Post Locked]

I'm a long-time reader of the red pill. My gf of over 4 years just spoke with me about an hour ago about breaking up. We were just chilling after watching a movie and I'm holding her and I hear her heart in her chest pounding well over 100 beats per minute. I ask if everything's okay and she says no and brings up the talk otherwise out of nowhere. We've only had amazing times together. I've always maintained a strong frame over the years which has made us both very happy. I'm in good shape and just landed a six figure job at the age of 24. Of course, none of that truly guarantees anything. Thanks to the red pill, I always knew this day could come and it has. So I just wanted to give a big thank you to this sub for making me a stronger and better man.

Anyway, the reason she cited was that she was scared she would regret missing out on what's out there since we met so young at the age of 20. That maybe this relationship wasn't the "one" we were destined for. I know she's been loyal over these four years too. She mentioned that deep down she wanted to explore what else is out there and to grow as a person from that.

What triggered this conversation and her anxiety was that I had just landed the job and was ready to introduce her to family for things to get serious. I'd rather not get into that though.

Regardless, despite my reading of the red pill, this experience has scared me a little bit. It's different when you're the one experiencing it. It scared me because it proves that no matter what I do and no matter how happy we are, she can just come up with something as simple as that and call it quits.

Edit: Thank you guys for the support. Lots of great advice as well just like I was expecting. You've made this day a lot better for what it is. I've uninstalled messenger, the app we used for communication, for the foreseeable future.

Edit 2: Curiosity got the better of me. I reinstalled messenger and saw she was active 7 hours ago. It's 11 am here. So she was up at 4 am. There's one of two possibilities: 1. She was up crying about me. 2. She was getting fucked by a guy or several that she already had lined up. I think we all know which one is more likely.

I am taking your advice and blocking her on Facebook and social media.

TLDR: If you're holding your girl and hear her heart pounding, she's probably about to break up with you

[-] oooKenshiooo 264 Points 2 months ago

Are you even aware what kind of high caliber thot bullet you just dodged?

You have build incredible value which many RP men can only dream of, you still have your best years to come. Why would a girl drop that?

I shall thell you, my crimsonly medicated brother.

She is not ready for something that serious, because she does not know her worth. You are objectively a good catch, but because she has not "earned" you (aquired you by means of hypergamy) she has no backdrop to compare you to. She has not put in the work. Picking you would have meant for her to kill the fictional chad of her dreams that resides in her subconscious. Most women are unable to do that, so the wall does it for them.

That kind of insecurity would have made your marriage hell, because had she not broken up with you, there would have been an onslaught of neverending shit tests.

[-] Pharmpharm7 80 Points 2 months ago

Thank you so much for that. You have a very valid point. If we had gotten married in a year or two, I would have been destined for divorce rape. I already knew there was a chance of that but my conversation with her confirmed it. If anything, I should be thankful she did us the favor of not going through that.

That's a very interesting point about the hypergamy. I felt because she gave me her best years that I would reward her with commitment but oh well.

Not only did I work on myself, I treated her really well too. She knew she was loved and cared for. Most things girls could dream of in a boyfriend, I gave her. I know she's going to find out eventually how well she had it with me. I know what the sexual market is like and how guys are going to treat her.

[-] oooKenshiooo 66 Points 2 months ago

Yeah, you are right. But: In her mind, her best years are NOW. They are always NOW until the wall comes.

VasiliyZaitzev wrote about how to approach dating women of different age groups. And according to him those in the mid 20 section tend to have inflated sense of self esteem. Because they are out of college and getting access to a wider variety of alpha dick than before. It is a correlation falacy. "I encounter more chads, therefore I must have gotten hotter."

[-] Pharmpharm7 25 Points 2 months ago

Interesting concept and it makes sense. When I brought up taking things to the next level, what she always wanted, she realized that when push came to shove, she wanted to not only ride the CC but that she could do better than me. She very well might so congratulations to her.

[-] redpillschool 9 Points 2 months ago

Specifically when they turn 21.

No woman truly realizes her power until she enters a bar and gets drooled over.

Once they're bar dwellers, you can just forget about them.

[-] [deleted] 2 months ago
[-] bongolese 2 Points 2 months ago

Would appreciate reading what he had to say

[-] donkeydodo 35 Points 2 months ago

You can safely assume that she’ll be back within 6 months to 2 years. Don’t take her back, at tops sleep with her but nothing else. Also, never marry; you are aware of marriage rape, yet marriage is in your mind. Perhaps it is a part of your country’s culture, but you’ve got to see past that, be rational and logical, NEVER marry out of ’love’, marriage doesn’t prove your love for anyone, it proves that you still have an inner cuck to silence. As someone mentioned, you have reached a goal only some can dream of on this forum, don’t let women ruin that.

[-] Gr0o0vy 13 Points 2 months ago

If there is one thing I would bet on, it is that she comes back.

I would pay to see the look on her face when she sees OP with a hotter, younger and more obedient chick.

[-] reversec 3 Points 2 months ago

The best revenge. Ignore and focus on improving and getting the best version of you. Make their hamster work, who knows, they can be Fubus, and at some time, he can be the one to dispose her at some point.

[-] DoctorWaffleHouse 4 Points 2 months ago

Exactly THIS.

​

Marriage is a social construct that women have brainwashed men to believe is beneficial for them. It's fucking not. STOP buying into the social narrative that marriage is the true goal for any relationship.

​

Marriage is like putting a tattoo of your ex named 'Becky' on your fucking forehead.

[-] donkeydodo 3 Points 2 months ago

I’m gonna copy pasta a comment I made on another sub

Correct. Marriage did serve a purpose back in the days; when people married, they married before "God", forcing them to stay faithful. No matter if God exists or not, this worked because people, in general, are extremely judgemental. In small villages, everyone knew each other, and someone who wasn't religious or faithful was disgraceful. So when someone didn't stay faithful to their respective, they became an outcast of the village; thus, marriage served a purpose for people to stay true to their partner. However, in modern days, people don't marry before "God" anymore; we've gone from being disgraceful in case we're not faithful, so people fuck around with whoever they want in case they feel like it anyways, and the only thing that happens when you marry someone, followed by a divorce, is that you're forced to give away your stuff if you're the one who's materially richer in the relationship. In the majority of relationships, men are the ones who are the backbones of it, because men, in general, have a higher wage and there is a lot of women who are stay-at-home wives. - men are the suppliers. Thus, when the woman gets bored --> fucks another man, followed by a divorce 5 years later, he's getting so-called marriage raped. She acts like an entitled bitch and gets the house, the kids, the car, and half your wage because "sHe Is USeD To tHis TyPE oF liFeSTylE"

No, marriage is retarded nowadays, especially for the man. Plus, if you're interested in sex, there is a big risk that you'll get a lot less of that in case you marry. Women are gatekeepers of sex, and men are gatekeepers of commission. How this in general works is a sort of a trading system; man gets pussy if he gives commission. This is why 'niceguys' never get pussy; they give commission out freely, effectively allowing women to get it without them having to pay them with their pussy. This is also why real sluts never find a boyfriend; she gives out her pussy too easily, thus she becomes boring. There is a thrill in the hunt, on both sides.

If you choose to marry, you're basically saying "You have my commission" automatically, thus she won't have to fight for your commission by giving you pussy; unless you're a real alpha, which most men aren't nowadays, you'll only get pussy on rare occasions, e.g. when you and your wife gets a bit drunk at your neighbors house.

Whoever chooses to downvote this, save this comment and re-read it in 20 years when all this has happened to you.

[-] reversec 1 Point 2 months ago

right, don't fall to the burden of the role that society wants you to be.

[-] CannabisCumshot69 29 Points 2 months ago

Not only did I work on myself, I treated her really well too. She knew she was loved and cared for. Most things girls could dream of in a boyfriend, I gave her. I know she's going to find out eventually how well she had it with me. I know what the sexual market is like and how guys are going to treat her.

Just make sure you don't go weird-incel-mode and obsess over shit like this. Even assuming all of this is true, don't dwell on it, just acknowledge it and move on with your life.

If you ever find yourself thinking "how could she break up with me, I gave her everything" then slap yourself as hard as you can.

[-] SteroidsFreak 10 Points 2 months ago

^ This I agree with. That's where abundance comes into play but when scarcity is at the top, you tend to do this. Dwelling is part of moving on, it's ok to dwell for a couple minutes, (yes men have feelings as well and we should acknowledge that) but don't get hung up on it. Get back on the grind and start being positive with yourself

[-] rukken 7 Points 2 months ago

Incel quickly lost its meaning and became a catch-all word for 'bitter man I don't like' on this website by basically everyone. He's clearly able to get laid, therefore not involuntary celibate.

I agree with your comment but this phenomenon has been irking me for a while.

[-] [deleted] 2 months ago
[-] magx01 4 Points 2 months ago

None of that matters; her biological imperative is to collect a variety of genetic material while still fertile.

[-] Pharmpharm7 6 Points 2 months ago

I thought the imperative was to find the best genetic material. Finding a variety is more of a guy thing.

[-] redpillschool 15 Points 2 months ago

Alpha fucks, beta bucks.

Whether or not you know it, you were signaling the beta bucks. And you might have had the perfect balance of alpha fucks (who knows) but women are keen to keep looking for higher alpha sperm (hypergamy). After 4 years she may very well wonder what happens if she dabbles with some of the guys who have been giving her looks this past 4 years.

In her mind, she already knows she can bag a provider. She might think this is a given. She will be surprised in 10 years when she's got the thousand cock stare and no one like you to pick her up.

Trust me, your experience is very similar to mine in my early twenties.

This is what happens when the older generation of women don't explain the wall to the younger generation.

[-] Pharmpharm7 8 Points 2 months ago

Thanks to this sub, I definitely realize now that I gave a huge beta signal when I gave her the offer of finally meeting my family. She's good looking she might be able to find another provider down the line after she's had a gluttonous amount of cocks. What I can promise you is that that provider will not be me.

I'm sorry you went through something similar. I'm sure it was a tremendous opportunity for growth though.

You're absolutely right about the older generation. The thing is, she has a great family. That was one of the reasons I considered her LTR material. If they're anything close to the decent people that I think they are, they will smack her stupid when they realize what she has done and why.

Maybe she won't tell them for awhile, maybe she won't understand or accept what they tell her for years. Regardless, when the messenger of truth, the wall, makes her realize her descending value, it will be horribly, catastrophically, too late.

[-] redpillschool 8 Points 2 months ago

I definitely realize now that I gave a huge beta signal when I gave her the offer of finally meeting my family.

I don't think so. Fuck- my family has met my LTR. My guess is you've been signalling beta for a lot longer.

Based on your replies here- calling her "the one" and fantasizing about how great of a thing you had- you've been signalling oneitis beta Billy to her with the volume on fucking 11.

I'm sorry you went through something similar. I'm sure it was a tremendous opportunity for growth though.

It lead me to the manosphere and here. Can't argue with the results.

[-] Pharmpharm7 4 Points 2 months ago

I guess so. It's hard not getting comfortable after this long of a relationship. I probably did show plenty of beta signals and it has hurt me.

[-] rogerramjetz 3 Points 2 months ago

She will probably tell them a bunch of bullshit driven by her hamster narrative.

I wouldn't expect her to ever tell them the complete truth as it actually is.

Of course, to her, it will be the truth because her hamster told her so.

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

Tell me, what do you think is the complete truth and what do you think she will say instead

[-] rexdor2010 1 Point 2 months ago

They'll make up some plausible bullshit that is totally subjective.

"He was needy and insecure." "He was too emotionally distant and wouldn't open up." "He was emotionally abusive." "He always ignored my feelings." "All he cared about was himself." "He never listened to me." "We outgrew each other." "We drifted apart." "We just weren't compatible." "He was really selfish."

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

Oh well. Her family knows who I really am.

[-] rogerramjetz 1 Point 2 months ago

The complete truth from what you have outlined is that she wants to ride the cc at the very least. Maybe she already has.

She will tell them whatever her hamster dictates at the time (what mood she is in).

She will likely rewrite history according to her current feelz. Lookup the "light switch effect" in TRP.

Look after yourself.

[-] DoctorWaffleHouse 1 Point 2 months ago

Definitely. You obviously seem more invested in the relationship than she was. You want it the other way around, she should have been the one begging you to meet her family.

[-] magx01 2 Points 2 months ago

I'd say both- best for sure but also variety because they want multiple different traits not always contained in the same person. Also, it's a social bonding thing- sleep with multiple men and now multiple men care about your survival.

[-] DoctorWaffleHouse 0 Points 2 months ago

If a woman gets fucked by 10 different guys at the same time.

Then the sperm that reaches her egg the fastest is evolutionary seen as probably the one containing the best genetic material. Obviously this doesn't make sense to our modern way of thinking where we value intelligence more than 20.000 years ago, but it still rooted in a lot of women's way of thinking.

It's like an ultra-efficient way of getting the best genetic material without having to take potentially months to find the right alpha.

[-] reversec 3 Points 2 months ago

" I treated her really well too. She knew she was loved and cared for. Most things girls could dream of in a boyfriend, I gave her. "

This is what they dreamt of by a paperlist
Who says they're the only ones who can use the "Thank you, next" mentality?

Know you're worth, and you won't be shaken by the shits thrown at you. I know you know it.

[-] yomo86 2 Points 2 months ago

For comparison: An attractive women in hear very early 20s is the equivalent to a multi-millionaire.

The HB7 is also going to ask herself why said multi-millianaire dropped her although she gave him everything he possibly can ask for as a man.

Now bundle this with the emotion-driven nature of a woman et voila break-up in Wonderland.

[-] VasiliyZaitzev 3 Points 2 months ago

An attractive women in hear very early 20s is the equivalent to a multi-millionaire.

Who is, in a few short years, destined to go on a steady losing streak until she winds up "broke".

[-] HandsofThyme 1 Point 2 months ago

Meanwhile on our side of the fence, you can really savor the juice of just being a plain ‘ol multimillionaire - nice and slow, till you’re circa 70.

[-] flapjacksrbetter 34 Points 2 months ago

Oh shit that paragraph hit the nail on the head. Cant compare guys since she never hoed around. But she will come around and realize “the one that got away” ????

[-] Pharmpharm7 -15 Point 2 months ago

Love that. If I block her, she won't be able to see the man I become either. I really want her to see the end result when I'm in my late 20's and early 30's: Fit and driving around in a fucking Porsche.

[-] SuperCrazy07 44 Points 2 months ago

Stop fantasizing about this.

[-] Pharmpharm7 38 Points 2 months ago

You're right, it's not healthy. I'm going to be focusing on myself.

[-] mitzibishi 10 Points 2 months ago

Go get your dick wet. You will forget it ever happened.

[-] Pharmpharm7 0 Points 2 months ago

The thing is, getting my dick wet is about the easiest thing in the world. Having a once in a lifetime kind of relationship is a lot harder. I've tried seeing other chicks before, none of them were ever as well rounded as she was, especially psychologically.

[-] redpillschool 4 Points 2 months ago

The thing is, getting my dick wet is about the easiest thing in the world.

If it's so easy, then do it. Nothing cures "heart ache" more than rebound sex. The rush of adrenaline and endorphins will make you realize what you've been missing over those 4 years.

Having a once in a lifetime kind of relationship is a lot harder.

That right there is your blue pill idealization of "the one." It's called oneitis and you better learn to turn that off ASAP. It will do you no favors.

I've tried seeing other chicks before, none of them were ever as well rounded as she was, especially psychologically.

Dude, you aren't having sex with their god damned college degrees.

Trust me on this one, there is nothing special about this one. You've gotten yourself chemically addicted to her and that's going to be a hard habit to break. But this thinking will only hurt you in the long run.

Guess how you wane yourself from this chemical addiction?

STOP MAKING EXCUSES, GO GET LAID

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

Trust me I will be seeing other pussy and soon. I know it will help tremendously. I know I have a bit of oneitis, not going to deny it. It's hard not to after 4 years to be fair. But I will treat her like any other useless tinder match and block her.

[-] unwantedApathy 19 Points 2 months ago

This.

It's obviously still fresh, but you'll never be over her if you're only trying to better yourself to stick it to her, and show her what she's missing out on.

Be better for yourself.

[-] The-Peter-Principle 24 Points 2 months ago

This is revenge fantasy and not healthy for you. Don’t waste you time or any part of your mental capacity on such meaningless feeling.

True story - a girl once asked me what I thought the opposite of love was. Hate, I replied. She rolled her eyes and said “no it’s indifference”. The penny really dropped for me on how girls think.

Chick-logic will go something like this: “you want her to see how well you’re doing and what she lost. So, then you still have feelz therefore still love/hate her and that’s something she can try to manipulate!

She then tries to waste your time with any number of silly mind games, undermine your new relationship etc.

Fuck the drama right off, right now.

[-] Pharmpharm7 8 Points 2 months ago

Yeah you're right. 0 attention will always be the way to go.

[-] redpillschool 5 Points 2 months ago

It's going to be hard. Don't be alone. Get together with friends. Stay busy. Block her on all media. Delete phone number.

These actions will help in times of weakness.

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

Way ahead of you, thank you.

[-] Whodatunkit 4 Points 2 months ago

Was she a Lumineer's fan? I believe that line is in a Lumineers song; Stubborn Love. " It's better to feel pain, than nothing at all The opposite of love's indifference." I'm more partial to the first stanza, " She'll lie and steal, and cheat, and beg you from her knees Make you think she means it this time she'll tear a hole in you, the one you can't repair." Meh, AWALT.

[-] JarHeadJoseph 2 Points 2 months ago

That’s a universal truth, not just a Lumineer’s lyric, dawg.

[-] The-Peter-Principle 1 Point 2 months ago

Ha! no I don’t think so. A bit after “our time”

[-] silent_dominant 2 Points 2 months ago

Can't say I disagree with that honestly.

[-] redpillschool 2 Points 2 months ago

Block her. In fact, delete facebook.

[-] Pharmpharm7 2 Points 2 months ago

I don't want to lose my social life too. I blocked her this morning on all social media. Doing this as early as the next day of the break up will really hit it home that she fucked up. This sub has helped me see the light, as it always has.

[-] redpillschool 3 Points 2 months ago

I don't want to lose my social life too.

Be prepared to lose it.

As a man who stands firm on his beliefs and isn't a push over, expect to lose friends during events like this.

That's why you have us.

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

Thank you. I was lucky enough that we didn't even share a social circle. My social circle barely even knows about her. We met on tinder. Cutting her off will be a relatively easy process compared to other break ups.

[-] MrGoodStuff05 1 Point 2 months ago

I really want her to see the end result

no

[-] MattyAnon 19 Points 2 months ago

Why would a girl drop that? I shall thell you, my crimsonly medicated brother.

Because she feels he's a solid option she can return to after boning Chad. This is what commitment does to the female brain.

[-] Pharmpharm7 5 Points 2 months ago

It just sucks that one slip up might have fucked over years of work. I'm not going to reply to her inevitable messages for a month or two or more. It feels like I'm going through the hardest shit test in the world right now. That she wants to see how I react. Am I beta that's going to beg her to come back? Or do I know I can do much better than her and not even bother replying for months.

I know she's going to come back, the thing is we had something pretty fucking special. I don't want to be a beta that's okay with her doing this but I also don't want to lose years of chemistry and someone that I know is 100% compatible with me.

[-] MattyAnon 15 Points 2 months ago

Give it up. She went off and fucked someone else. Sorry but it's true. If you have her back now she will respect you even less.

Cut your losses. I know it hurts, but forget her. Move on. Get other women, or avoid them for a while. Stop trying to claw back what you had or thought you had. It's gone.

Sorry for the brutal truth but you need to hear it.

Am I beta that's going to beg her to come back? Or do I know I can do much better than her and not even bother replying for months.

Not relevant. She is now IRRELEVANT to you. She had her chance, it's over. Next.

She wants to go fuck other men. It can't have been that special for her, can it?

I also don't want to lose years of chemistry and someone that I know is 100% compatible with me.

Quit the fucking denial.

You can have chemistry with someone within minutes of meeting.

She cheated (or will cheat) because you are letting her by being there for her regardless. You made her feel secure and this is her response.

You want her because you don't have better options. She isn't attracted because you don't have better options.

Brutal truth but you need to fucking wake up.

[-] Pharmpharm7 2 Points 2 months ago

She wants to go fuck other men. It can't have been that special for her, can it?

Hit the nail on the head.

She's not cheating when it's already over. I'll be getting options soon.

[-] slickmizzle 3 Points 2 months ago

go no contact for a month... re-evaluate from that point if you want to get back together or just enjoy the single life etc. You're only 24... enjoy these years to the fullest.

[-] Pharmpharm7 0 Points 2 months ago

I spoke to her. I told her if we go through with this it's likely to be permanent. She finally understands that now. We're going to take a week to cool down and reevaluate.

The problem is that's how she feels. I feel guilty as fuck because I've been fucking other women. I feel like this is karma. That it's only fair she gets a chance to live too. I fucked so many women and she's stayed so loyal. This might be insane to say but giving us a break would even the playing field psychologically.

[-] jihocech 1 Point 2 months ago

There is always someone better. A new fresh alpha is always better than the old known one.

[-] tchower 1 Point 2 months ago

Man, so even attraction for girls is inversely proportional to your SMV. So by this logic, the only way to guarantee an LTR is for the girl to be fatter and uglier than you or from a much lower socioeconomic status. This makes me wanna go Monk mode and stay away from woman. Lol!

What’s the fun in sex and a relationship if I don’t even like the girl? Better to just eat chocolate or feel the dopamine rush of success than have an LTR who’s below me just to have a loyal girlfriend. Sounds lame as hell. Lol

[-] MattyAnon 1 Point 2 months ago

Man, so even attraction for girls is inversely proportional to your SMV.

No.... more SMV is always good. It's commitment that's the attraction killer.

So by this logic, the only way to guarantee an LTR is for the girl to be fatter and uglier than you or from a much lower socioeconomic status

There are no guarantees. Even a fat ugly stupid low class hog will cheat. Even if you're Johnny fucking Depp.

This makes me wanna go Monk mode and stay away from woman. Lol!

If I told you that friends are not there forever and they have other friends, would you never enjoy a beer with your mates ever again?

Of course not. You can still have awesome relationships with women. Even more so if you accept they're temporary. This makes them better, makes the girl behave better, but it still won't last forever.

What’s the fun in sex and a relationship if I don’t even like the girl?

You can still like the girl.

than have an LTR who’s below me just to have a loyal girlfriend. Sounds lame as hell. Lol

It's only the "loyal girlfriend" part you need to give up on. You can have everything else including great relationships.

[-] tchower 1 Point 2 months ago

The commitment part of it I agree, girls try to trick us into that. I guess the difference with male friends is that they’re not as greedy and are a lot less drama, and it isn’t as complicated to figure out. And a girl will try to waste your resources and time before the sex happens or after and you can’t let that happen. Hard to find girls out there that are like that, and just won’t move on to a another fool that’ll waste their time and resources on them.

[-] thedaynos 1 Point 2 months ago

Quit the fucking denial.

You can have chemistry with someone within minutes of meeting.

i would like to add to this that OP will NEVER have that "chemistry" with her again.

If you get back with her, you might have the same inside jokes and you might feel that sense of comfort. but you will ALWAYS know that she has disrespected you in the worst way possible and she will know she can do it again. Fuck a chemistry.

[-] AshyLarry27 3 Points 2 months ago

It just sucks that one slip up might have fucked over years of work.

The most nauseating thing to hear on this sub without a doubt is this idea that "ooohhh man, I fucked up. If only my biceps were another two centimeters girthy, if only I treated her more like shit like an alpha, oh man the shit tests."

Wrong. Women get tired of men. They have options. It's like if you have a favorite food. You could win a lifetime supply of like the most delicious high quality steak for morning, lunch, and dinner. At some point anything else is better than that steak you will have been eating for the third straight week. It's not the high quality steak's fault you needed more variety to your diet. Steak didn't fuck up sometime during that third week but not passing your shit tests. You needed something new. This is simply a concept men can't even begin to relate to in the dating world because of societal norms that men must approach women, and thus women have options. This is why we have sayings like "it was just your turn."

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

I get that. I really fucking do. I just needed to let her know that this decision will very likely be irreversible forever and now she knows this. I'm sorry I'm going to take a fucking break from reddit. You guys give amazing advice but I don't want to lose her because of my fucking ego. We're grown ups that can talk shit out and that's what we're doing. Look for an update either here or asktrp in a couple of weeks. Thank you everyone.

[-] AshyLarry27 1 Point 2 months ago

My main point was to stop blaming yourself, or even get mad at her. She can't control her feelings, you can't justify aimed anger at something she can't even choose. This is why most women let men down easily, and after years of it start hitting the "fuck it I'll just ghost" button. Don't create such an "the end is the end" ultimate mentality. You get your mind way more locked in on her and cause yourself pointless pain. The "dating" relationship is over, if you guys talk or stay friends, whatever, I get its not easy letting go of people you've had in your life a long time.

One thing. Don't restart this relationship. She will go back to you only out of comfort and a FOMO mentality, she will inevitably get comfortable and fall out of feelings for you again. Taking her back in general sets you back a lot of alpha points in her subconscious mind, so you're already starting from a handicap to begin with let alone trying to reignite and maintain the impossible

[-] Synthetic_Citizen 3 Points 2 months ago

"I know she's going to come back, the thing is we had something pretty fucking special. I don't want to be a beta that's okay with her doing this but I also don't want to lose years of chemistry and someone that I know is 100% compatible with me."

She is banking on this emotional investment, she is well aware of your strong feelings toward her, her confidence in your emotional investment assures her that she can return to you a dozen dicks later and you will accept her with open arms.

Women do not like feeling bad, the will use whatever means they can to feel better. This is why women who have recently broken up go for makeovers, cut or dye their hair and ride a carousal of dick. They want to smother the bad feeling with feel good activities.

Whether she feels good or bad about it doesnt matter, either way she is already searching for someone else if she has not found it already. She fucking told you herself that she wants to drop you for strange dick what more do you need.

[-] Pharmpharm7 4 Points 2 months ago

Yeah except I won't be accepting her with open arms. I blocked her on social media so I think she understands that now.

That's crazy you mentioned that about the hair. Yesterday, the day we broke up, she had her straighted for the first time in a long time...

[-] DIARRHEA_EXORCISM 3 Points 2 months ago

100%? Stop lying to yourself. She wants to fuck other guys. It's over. Block and never reply.

[-] [deleted] 2 months ago
[-] rexdor2010 1 Point 2 months ago

What you had with her is worthless. She voluntarily threw it all away so she could go out and see if she can get a guy who is better than you, because she thinks she deserves better than you.

A relationship where she decides that you're not good enough... is a worthless and unhealthy relationship.

[-] BPasFuck 5 Points 2 months ago

Bingo.

OP, this chick probably imagines she'll be able to dip her toe in the water, and come running back to you later.

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

That's exactly what it is. I won't be responding to her for months. We had something amazing though and I don't know how I'm going to react when she inevitably comes back.

[-] redpillschool 14 Points 2 months ago

That's exactly what it is. I won't be responding to her for months.

No, you won't be responding to her ever.

We had something amazing though and I don't know how I'm going to react when she inevitably comes back.

Oneitis. Get rid of it. Think she's thinking this about you? SHE FUCKING ISN'T

[-] Pharmpharm7 5 Points 2 months ago

You're right she isn't. She was active on messenger really late last night, much later than usual. I know she must have been fucking someone she had lined up, fuck her. I've blocked her for my own health.

[-] redpillschool 7 Points 2 months ago

Now keep her blocked.

When you feel the urge to unblock her, call a friend, to to a bar, come here, jump on IRC and chat. DO ANYTHING BUT.

[-] Pharmpharm7 6 Points 2 months ago

I will come here or asktrp in times of weakness. I obviously still have plenty of beta qualities and will come here for advice when necessary.

[-] DIARRHEA_EXORCISM 3 Points 2 months ago

She wants to taste test other penises before trying to backtrack. Don't listen to a word of it

[-] redpillschool 3 Points 2 months ago

Indeed. If she isn't thoroughly convinced that you won't be there when she comes back, then what's keeping her in the first place?

[-] hmsthinkingmeat 3 Points 2 months ago

This is exactly what my ex wife thought.

When I told her I'd been to a solicitor and filed for divorce (just got the decree absolute today!), her cold-hearted didn't give a damn about me attitude crumbled - she burst into tears and started hyperventilating down the phone - "why do we have to get divorced - can't we just leave it for a few years?"

I said no we can't, you've made your bed and now you get the pleasure of lying in it - you're on your own I don't want to ever see or hear from you again.

I think that shattered her fantasy that I'd be waiting here to take her back and fix all of her shit when her life inevitably collapses around her ears.

She's 44 years old and is out clubbing like she's 24.

In 5 months since we sold the house and she got her share - she's blown the lot - she's been spending the equivalent of $1150 PER WEEK while she earns c.$2400 per month (I can see her bank statements - silly cow still has them sent to my email address).

She's a moron.

[-] MattyAnon 3 Points 2 months ago

She's a moron

The world has taught her that someone else will always pick up the pieces. So far she's been right.

[-] civilizedfrog 13 Points 2 months ago

I have been hearing a lot of stories like this for a while now. I think that you are right about the part where has not put in the work and her not having "earned" you is the reason why girls want to see if there is any other better catch. However, I also think that this can be avoided by applying DREAD early on. There is two advantages in doing this:-

  • The drama created will keep her mind busy from thoughts like if there is better person out there.
  • It forces her to put in the work and think that she earned the relationship.

But that is just my 0.02$.

[-] oooKenshiooo 5 Points 2 months ago

Yes you are right about that. OP was not applying enough DREAD.

[-] Pharmpharm7 4 Points 2 months ago

Lol I was literally fucking other plates. I had abundance mentality. All the dread in the world wouldn't have stopped her from wondering what else is out there.

[-] oooKenshiooo 11 Points 2 months ago

I see. I did not sound like that from your OP.

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

I wasn't sure if I wanted to disclose that tbh

[-] PM_Me_OK 22 Points 2 months ago

Well she's better off without you then. You're cheating on her and her leaving is the issue? Good for her. Maybe she picked up on something you were hiding, or that you were hiding things. Perhaps your character drove her away, but you think you're "the shit" so her leaving you wasnt your fault. Right? I mean you got a high paying job and you arent fat. Cuz having those things means you are the man any girl would want that. Nothing else matters...ha get real. You, just like many of the guys on here who's girl left them for no good reason are just blind to your own faults. We don't like to admit that it's us that's the problem. But many times it's not only the woman who is. It goes both ways. Maybe you werent able to form that deep connection she is looking for. Deep on another level of connection, vulnerabilites exposed and put aside, isnt an easy thing get into to. You cant just be a rock.

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

Never said I was the shit but okay.

[-] BPasFuck 5 Points 2 months ago

Hahaha, fuck that guy bro. He's one of these 'A real man doesn't cheat' fags.

Like he's some arbiter of what makes a real man.

The only way a non-cheating dude can be 100% certified to be a real man, is if he has a pair of testicles.

Same goes for an adulterous cad.

[-] Pharmpharm7 2 Points 2 months ago

Thanks man. I don't let them get to me.

[-] JarHeadJoseph 1 Point 2 months ago

Yeah that’s all well and good but just remember that women are almost to default, the winning side of any relationship dynamic. Most of the time, they hold the power. Red pillers change that dynamic but who knows how much blue pill was showing on OP.

[-] empatheticapathetic 1 Point 2 months ago

Got any examples of things he likely failed at that actually matter to women?

[-] elfootballfan7 4 Points 2 months ago

Yes it would have. Something's really off about what you're saying. How do you have plates and simultaneously care enough about this gf to make a post about her? Even to discuss her?

[-] BPasFuck 3 Points 2 months ago

I'm not OP, but it's easy.

Men can love and care for more than one woman.

I'm sure you don't believe that. But that's probably because you've never been in a position to love anyone at all.

[-] civilizedfrog 3 Points 2 months ago

Did she know that you were seeing other girls?

[-] bakamoney 18 Points 2 months ago

Won't mention that on op lul.

This post is same as the women subs- blame others In a one sided story to garner sympathy/push a narrative.

[-] EndTimesRadio 2 Points 2 months ago

I dunno. I tried dread by playing a little game with her.

‘Ha, try complaining about me to your friends- oh but the sex is so good... their reactions will be ‘oh how dare he, quick give me his name and address.’ That worked, for a while. But AWALT.

[-] dDiegoDLV 9 Points 2 months ago

His gf bought into the lie that she should ride the carousel. Women used to be happy to hang onto a quality guy. Now they are all searching endlessly for a man that meets an impossibly high standard and bitching there are no good men.

[-] Pharmpharm7 2 Points 2 months ago

There's not a lot more that I could have done. Her family are very good people though. We got along very well. I think when she eventually drops the news to them that she broke it off for such an idiotic reason, they're going to smack some sense into her. If this happens in a couple weeks or in a month or two, I might consider taking her back, I don't know yet. If she comes back when she's 30, used up and smacked into the wall, it will be a hard no 100%.

[-] rogerramjetz 1 Point 2 months ago

She won't be telling them the idiotic reason you think she will.

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

Hmm what do you think she'll say?

[-] [deleted] 2 months ago
[-] GroovyLyfe 5 Points 2 months ago

Well said. Plus 100k at 24....you have a lot women waiting for you in the future my friend trust me

[-] rexdor2010 1 Point 2 months ago

How does money even matter? Can't you just lie about your salary and how much you have in the bank?

[-] dbz0x 5 Points 2 months ago

This exact experience was what happened to me about a year ago. I was never truly able to understand why she called it quits because in my mind I was Chad, what else would you want out there? But I was also her first and only and what you said makes perfect sense with that in mind. The wall is truly the only way they find out they fucked up and hopefully by then I’ll be long over one particular woman. Right now I’m slaying this pussy but you know that “one” always leaves some remnant thoughts but I appreciate the fuck out of this comment because it was a reminder and the truth of my experience with my “unicorn” smh. Onwards my brother.

[-] rexdor2010 1 Point 2 months ago

Same here. She was a virgin when she met me. It's honestly sad that this happens nowadays... totally shattered the blue pill fantasy for me.

[-] Pharmpharm7 -1 Point 2 months ago

Thanks for the insight. It sucks cause this just happened yesterday though. When she hits the wall and realizes she couldn't do better, I don't think I'll be okay with taking her back in after she was used up.

Right now the thing that's on my mind is, she's a smart girl. She might realize this within a couple weeks or months. What should I do then? I know how shitty the quality of women is in this market.

[-] redpillschool 3 Points 2 months ago

She is not ready for something that serious, because she does not know her worth. You are objectively a good catch, but because she has not "earned" you (aquired you by means of hypergamy) she has no backdrop to compare you to. She has not put in the work. Picking you would have meant for her to kill the fictional chad of her dreams that resides in her subconscious. Most women are unable to do that, so the wall does it for them.

Been there. They end up trying to crawl back months or years later. "I didn't know how great I had it."

Bitch, you're all used up now, why would I take you back?

Also known as the alpha widow. Some day, she'll bag a beta chump, and he'll never be good enough as she thinks of you while having duty sex.

[-] jbpostv 1 Point 2 months ago

Incredible analysis. Honestly even though people obsess about 9’s and 10’s they’re a wreck unless you’re a solid 10. I’ve always enjoyed dating chicks 3 points lower than me where hypergamy is strong because even if they’re average looking they’re loyal af, put out and freakily like mad because they’re insecure you’ll leave and don’t set up nearly as much shit testing and mind games. They subconsciously become sexually adventurous, behave themselves, adore you and are open about their efforts to be a good girlfriend or plate. Better to raise SMV and shoot for 2-3 points under because the experience and relational quality is excellent and so much less trouble.

[-] oooKenshiooo 3 Points 2 months ago

TBH, I had the same thought recently. The vast majority of >8 women are so fucked in their head, it is just not worth the hassle of a commitment. It is better to keep them as plates and build up a 6 or 7 with solid character and low risk psychological make up.

[-] DIARRHEA_EXORCISM 3 Points 2 months ago

Every 8+ is fucked up mentally because they've just been smiled at and nodded to their whole life, no one wants to tell them no cause everyone wants to fuck them. It's always funny even when big tit glamour models have no ass at all because no one is going to tell an 8+ with huge natural tits that they need to start doing squats, at the risk of upsetting them/losing them.

[-] [deleted] 2 months ago
[-] javiercer20 1 Point 2 months ago

LTR? I see many guys still hesitating to swallow the pill here...

[-] itiswr1tten 203 Points 2 months ago

Couple of basics:

  • No contact means NO CONTACT. Do not stay in touch, and if you can't resist creeping social media block her on everything; no sex either, even if she insists she's cool with it, because this was clearly the most important relationship of your life so boomerang game ain't you

  • There's a reason we tell you she isn't yours, it's just your turn - this is classic AWALT where she is "worried" she'll regret not slutting it up in her prime years. You are correct there is nothing else you could do here

  • You are headed into your prime years and not behind in any way - you're in shape, make good money, and have sexual experience. Your value is increasing.

  • Now is the time to get out there and really sharpen your game

  • There are 1000 other women available to you that will fuck you and treat you BETTER than she ever did. Go find them

  • Don't settle for "having a type". Fuck MILFs. Fuck black girls. Fuck crazy bitches (but with a condom). Go try out the local fauna and see what you ACTUALLY like.

Now I give you permission to go forth and SLAY.

[-] Pharmpharm7 54 Points 2 months ago

Yeah if anything I'll leave her on "seen". While my shape is decent, I have plenty of room for improvement so I'll be working on that. Otherwise, doing well with my job and paying off some student loans are going to be my main focus.

I'll admit, my game has stayed sharp. I feel a little guilty. She's stayed loyal but I have a couple of plates ready to go.

[-] itiswr1tten 92 Points 2 months ago

No reason to feel guilty. She undoubtedly has something lined up too....

[-] zealanderx 22 Points 2 months ago

Ha!

It's true.

OP, IT'S it'swritten first point is important. I've had break ups like this. It's just tough. Going no contact is the way to go. For yourself and mental health. Just tell her that and it's cool.

[-] Pharmpharm7 5 Points 2 months ago

Yeah we're not going to be speaking for a couple days and probably going to officially cut it off in a couple days when she texts me.

[-] itiswr1tten 31 Points 2 months ago

Why are you wasting time?

[-] Pharmpharm7 -13 Point 2 months ago

Lol thanks for that. I just don't want to message her. And if I block her I'll always wonder what she had to say to me. I'm not taking her back regardless.

[-] DeadliftRx 19 Points 2 months ago

Nothing good can come from allowing her the final word. She's probably out there getting gangbanged, right now, and afterwards she will ask to come back. Why would you even give her the opportunity?

[-] Pharmpharm7 -8 Point 2 months ago

Lol I know literally right now she's babysitting. But maybe later she will be. I will never view her in the same light again, that's for sure...

I also think she's either at her peak SMV or close to it. I'm nowhere near mine. It'll be nice to let her see what I become.

[-] partyboob305 17 Points 2 months ago

Who cares what she thinks...bitterness and revenge is a female trait.

[-] redpillschool 3 Points 2 months ago

Lol thanks for that. I just don't want to message her. And if I block her I'll always wonder what she had to say to me. I'm not taking her back regardless.

Dude, go full ghost. You're pretending there wasn't already a decision made.

SHE BROKE UP WITH YOU. IT'S ALREADY OVER. SHE HAS NOTHING GOOD TO SAY TO YOU.

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

Yes yes yes. I didn't realize this last night but this morning it hit me. I have blocked her and will ghost her. If she texts my phone for her apartment keys I won't even respond. I'll just slide them under her door and leave.

I realized that letting her get any other words in will only hurt me. Thank you.

[-] redpillschool 4 Points 2 months ago

If she texts my phone for her apartment keys

Put them in the mail today.

We might sound like we're tough on you (we are) but trust me, this is something a lot of us been through.

I really wish somebody told me the things I'm telling you.

When you're feeling weak (and you will, it will happen), don't call or text her. Read the sidebar here.

[-] Two_kids_in_a_coat 4 Points 2 months ago

That’s dumb. You’re young though. This one time you really need to listen to experience here. Cut her 100% out now. You will do so much better faster.

As a bonus it fucks with her knowing that you can do better. She’ll hate herself.

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

How's she going to know I can do better? We had a really amazing relationship. It sucks so much that one conversation about commitment from me ruined it all. The thing is, she thinks I'm the same type of breed her father was. That I'll be okay with getting back when she's done riding strange dick. I won't be. Is there any way to get this message across besides blocking?

[-] Two_kids_in_a_coat 4 Points 2 months ago

Because you not giving a shit will destroy her. You caring shows that you feel you can’t do better and you need her, which reinforces her belief that she deserves better then you because your pathetic. Nothing wets or dries pussy faster then other women wanting you. You HAVE to be superior to her for her to desire you. Being equal or needing her will slam the clam shut.

[-] Pharmpharm7 0 Points 2 months ago

Yes 100% agree. The only way she will ever get another response from me is if she begs me to take her back and soon. I'm not going to wait until she hits the wall. If she waits more than a couple months before begging for another chance it will be 100% over.

[-] rogerramjetz 2 Points 2 months ago

It's not the one conversation that ruined it all. She has probably been prepping to branch swing for a while now.

[-] [deleted] 2 months ago
[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

Yeah and if she doesn't she soon will..

[-] partyboob305 12 Points 2 months ago

By not cutting her off and taking the dominant role by not responding, you’d be proving to yourself that you’ve learned absolutely nothing from trp. Don’t let easy pussy bait u in. Get on tinder and bumble and flaunt everything youve worked your ass for. Couple suit pics of u and one doing something active. Make ur about me ill get dinner if you make breakfast and swipe right on everything wasting no time being some choosey little biatch. Youre welcome

[-] Pharmpharm7 3 Points 2 months ago

I totally agree with you. Doing that now.

[-] VasiliyZaitzev 37 Points 2 months ago

No contact means NO CONTACT. Do not stay in touch, and if you can't resist creeping social media block her on everything;

^ This.

Now ... go forth and SLAY.

I couldn't have said it better myself.

[-] itiswr1tten 9 Points 2 months ago

I stole that last line from you, I believe.

[-] VasiliyZaitzev 20 Points 2 months ago

Indeed, but that's ok. Good poets write, great poets steal, and all that.

Really, the art of being original is remembering what you heard, but forgetting where you heard it.

I'd tell you where I heard it, but I've forgotten.^1

^1 Actually, that is a quote by Laurence Peter, famous for the eponymous "Peter Principle".

[-] [deleted] 2 months ago
[-] Pharmpharm7 0 Points 2 months ago

What should I do if she comes back crawling in a couple weeks? Her parents are going to kill her when they find out what she did.

I think if she realizes she fucked up soon I might consider taking her back.. I don't know yet.

If she waits until she hits the wall at 30 or even a couple years from now it's 100% going to be a hard no from me, that I'm sure about.

[-] VasiliyZaitzev 3 Points 2 months ago

What should I do if she comes back crawling in a couple weeks?

Ok, pretend that me, /u/redpillschool and /u/itiswr1tten are sitting next to you the whole time berating you to Never.Ever.Take.Her.Back.Ever.

Why? Because you can NEVER trust her again, ever.

[-] Pharmpharm7 2 Points 2 months ago

She really did break my trust. She pretty much straight up told me she can do better.

[-] VasiliyZaitzev 3 Points 2 months ago

She really did break my trust. She pretty much straight up told me she can do better.

Sure, for now. Eventually, she will hear the conductor say, "WALL STATION! EVERYBODY OFF!"

[-] itiswr1tten 1 Point 2 months ago

My friend, it's time to stop posting. Take a break from reddit and just decompress. Don't feed your dopamine addiction with little orange envelopes. Log the fuck off

[-] redpillschool 2 Points 2 months ago

What should I do if she comes back crawling in a couple weeks? Her parents are going to kill her when they find out what she did.

I think if she realizes she fucked up soon I might consider taking her back.. I don't know yet.

If you want to hold on to this blue pill dream, then there's nothing we can do to help you.

When she comes crawling back, put a fucking condom on. Because her pussy is going to be full of other dude's jizz.

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

I'll be too repulsed to ever stick my dick in her again. She fucked up and she's going to have to live with that.

As far as the blue pill dream, I just want to have kids one day like most normal people.

[-] redpillschool 1 Point 2 months ago

It's possible, even understanding the red pill. But you need to build the right foundation for your relationship first.

Because you don't want it blowing up like this one did here.

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

Expect we had a really solid foundation. I don't know what else I could have done.

[-] VasiliyZaitzev 2 Points 2 months ago

Expect [sic] we had a really solid foundation.

Did you?

I don't know what else I could have done.

I suspect you were running a "Billy Beta" operation without knowing it. You need to keep them off-balance, keep the hamster spinning.

Y'know how you feel when you lean back on two legs of a chair, and then you almost fall but you catch yourself? They should feel like that all the time. Be lightly condescending without being a total dick. Thus when MY OLTR1 does something dumb-ish, that I have to fix, I look at her and say "It's lucky you're so pretty" and swat her on the ass. When a girl asks too many questions, I hit them with "Little spoons don't ask questions." If they are trying to get me to do something I don't want to do, e.g. go to the opera or ballet or some shit, I decline and say, "Because I don't want to do it" and look at them like they're stupid for not understanding me.

[-] redpillschool 1 Point 2 months ago

Read the sidebar here. Digest it. You will learn in good time.

[-] xiannnnnn 1 Point 2 months ago

Can you elaborate on boomerang game?

[-] itiswr1tten 5 Points 2 months ago

There's literally a post with that title. Use the search function

[-] VasiliyZaitzev 59 Points 2 months ago

Anyway, the reason she cited was that she was scared she would regret missing out on what's out there since we met so young at the age of 20.

Translation: "I want to go ride a mile of cock and get that used-up, Thousand Cock Stare!!!"

Girls are retarded.

That maybe this relationship wasn't the "one" we were destined for.

This isn't fucking "Highlander" and there is no "One".

Girls are retarded.

She mentioned that deep down she wanted to explore what else is out there and to grow as a person from that.

Ideally, she will have some heroin junkies run a train on her, get her pregged up, so, when she comes crawling back, leaking cum, you can say "El Señor Pharmpharm7 no esta aqui!" and then slam the door in her face.

Girls are retarded.

What triggered this conversation and her anxiety was that I had just landed the job and was ready to introduce her to family for things to get serious. I'd rather not get into that though.

Good. Bullet dodged. Better she do this dumb shit NOW then later, when you had a kid together.

it proves that no matter what I do and no matter how happy we are, she can just come up with something as simple as that and call it quits.

Better to know the truth.

Now go out and fuck ten other women. That bitch is dead to you now. DEAD. No fucking 'closure'. Move the fuck on. No little texts to 'check-in' and shit. Kill the fucking puppy.

[-] awalt_cupcake 16 Points 2 months ago

Finally some fucking fresh air on this post.

Doesn't this scream "I want to be with someone else" from the girl (subtext: someone specific and already in mind)? Girls dont really give a shit about the job you have unless it makes you or them popular in some way. They feed off the hype of the job title, not the security itself. Money is a plus but will always be a Beta male's game.

OP got put down gently.

[-] Pharmpharm7 7 Points 2 months ago

There won't be any checking in on my part. She asked for a break and she's going to get it. I'm actually grateful for the time she chose to do this. I wouldn't have been able to interview right if she did it before I got a job. It also would have fucked my relationship with my family if she did it after I introduce the fact that I've been seeing someone for years behind their back.

[-] VasiliyZaitzev 19 Points 2 months ago

You're GAWDDAM right there won't. She is DEAD to you. DEAD.

[-] [deleted] 2 months ago
[-] redpillschool 5 Points 2 months ago

She asked for a break and she's going to get it.

I don't think you get it.

It's not a break. It's a break-up.

There's no after.

[-] Pharmpharm7 3 Points 2 months ago

It's slowly starting to hit me.

[-] VasiliyZaitzev 2 Points 2 months ago

Good. Keep letting it hit you. Over the head. Until you 'get it'.

She is DEAD to you. DEAD. Go fuck other women. You will remember this in 6 months and think, "God, what a betafag I was about this chick. Eww."

[-] omen_tenebris 3 Points 2 months ago

This is so redpilled, that for a moment I thought I was on mgtow, as I read both subs. NICE

[-] redpillschool 1 Point 2 months ago

She mentioned that deep down she wanted to explore what else is out there and to grow as a person from that.

The only growing she's going to do is in her belly with another man's baby. LOL

[-] FeniZio94 46 Points 2 months ago

One thing

She thought she found someone else, period... I’ve read the comments and your replies and pls man... don’t even think about going back, fuck that hoe.

My golden rule in these scenarios is, the second one of these bs games are mentioned, immediately proceed to cut the relationship and nuke the bridge completely, drag the river and build a wall (no pun intended). Legit zero, absolutely zero contact. Most women believe they can slut it up and fuck their smv before getting serious... but you gotta show her that she fucked up

[-] Pharmpharm7 -1 Point 2 months ago

I agree. I just don't want to be rude because the relationship was good while it lasted, I genuinely think she deserves better than getting blocked. I'm going to let her message me and that'll be the end of it. Trust me, her family will let her know she fucked up for me.

[-] BobbyHardwood 21 Points 2 months ago

You use the words "deserves better" but that is you putting her on a pedestal. She is doing what she thinks is in her best interest but for some reason you are not willing to do the same for yourself.

By not going No Contact, you are giving her validation but more importantly, you are delaying your own growth. As someone who has allowed a relationship to fester for months after it ended, I still regret not going no contact sooner.

The future is looking great for you but you don't win by having her friends and family tell her she messed up. Sure that would feel great, but it is just temporary validation you are seeking. You win by moving on as hard as that may be.

[-] Pharmpharm7 5 Points 2 months ago

I'm not saying she deserves better than me, just better than being totally shit on since she hasn't really don't anything to deserve that. I won't be restarting the relationship and I won't be initiating contact probably ever again.

[-] missingkey2 6 Points 2 months ago

OP realize that blocking is not for you getting back to her. It's for you. You might be feeling damn strong or amped right after this but you will have moments of weakness when stupid texts come crawling in. Best is to block. If not turn of the notifications off and don't read any messages for a month. Let her feel the withdrawal symptoms. In case she doesn't beg for you take her back in a week be assured she branch swinged.

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

I think that might be the best chance I have of saving this. I won't be responding to anything she sends me. She might get a reply from me in a month or so. That'll let her know I'm not scared of losing her.

[-] VasiliyZaitzev 4 Points 2 months ago

I think that might be the best chance I have of saving this

Ok, little retarded child. There is NO SAVING ANYTHING. There is NOTHING to save. It's OVER.

That'll let her know I'm not scared of losing her.

/facepalm. Yeah, that's EXACTLY what she's going to be thinking about while she's getting spit-roasted by Chad and Tyrone.

[-] p3n1x 6 Points 2 months ago

Women are survivors, you keep speaking like she will realize "she fucked up". Stop thinking for her, you are in her frame when you do.

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

That's a good point about frame. I'm going to keep mine and not speak to her for at least a month or longer. I just don't know what I'll do yet if she decides to come back in a few weeks.

[-] p3n1x 2 Points 2 months ago

I just don't know what I'll do yet if she decides to come back in a few weeks.

Learn from this. This "feeling" is what you want to see happening in the future before it locks you down (your emotional investment). At 4 years, I get it, she is like a family member/friend. But you are looking at that friend like a "male" friend, she is looking at you like a soft landing pillow when the new guy doesn't hold up.

You told her about your new money, you are now her guy to settle down with after the cock carousel.

TRP goes against the grain of indoctrination right? So listen to all the guys who have lived through this, this girl is now downgraded to fuck-buddy and deserves nothing more. She must KNOW her new position.

She does not deserve your time, regardless if it is tomorrow or a month from now.

She does not deserve your decency if that decency makes you feel sad or shitty.

There is nothing wrong with people having sex with others, period. But, the issue at hand here is about validating her behavior. There is no recovery from "pillow", that is your rank with her forever. Like some other guys said, in 10 years from now, this chick will barely exist in your memory.

So if you are nothing but a pillow, then she can be nothing but a cum hole, OR the best option she should be forgotten.

We don't say these things to be "negative" or view women in a shitty way, it is to protect your mental health and future well being.

[-] Pharmpharm7 2 Points 2 months ago

I don't think I even want her as a fuck buddy. I'd be too repulsed by what she has done. There's too many fish in the sea to go back to her for cheap pussy.

It's a scary thought that I will forever be a pillow to land on in her eyes now. It won't be happening on my watch though.

[-] p3n1x 2 Points 2 months ago

After 4 years it sucks, nobody would ever disagree with that. But, you sound like you have a good grip on this already. Don't throw her a "nice guy" bone just because you might be feeling charitable.

[-] Pharmpharm7 2 Points 2 months ago

Yeah she really fucked me over, I won't.

[-] OneBrowUp 4 Points 2 months ago

The pill got stuck in your throat halfway through. I can already sense that you're subconsciously wishing that she will come back or initiate herself. And yes, she will, they all do at some point, but don't make the grave mistake of going through the trash.

[-] Pharmpharm7 0 Points 2 months ago

Yeah you'd be right. I know it was something special because we went 4 years with barely even an argument. She's going to realize eventually that we had a once in a lifetime kind of relationship.

[-] jizzledfreq 1 Point 2 months ago

Brother... Just swallow the damn red pill already! I know it's a bitter one to swallow, but you'll be in a lot better place once you do.

You're so blind to what TRP teachings are and how it relates to your situation. You're being a huuuuuge beta.

Think about it like this, your now ex, is being fucked by MULTIPLE men, in the worst kinds of ways. Swallowing buckets of come, getting fucked in the ass, letting other men do the shit she never let you do to her.

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

Yeah I'm experiencing constant nausea/anxiousness right now. I feel a little sick

[-] jizzledfreq 2 Points 2 months ago

Trust me man, I pined after my baby mama for longer than I'd like to admit. I knew about red pill, but I was in deep denial, even after witnissing it with my own eyes. I think 2019 I managed to choke it down, and moved into the anger phase.

AWALT

Why take back someone who felt life with you was so boring they'd rather have casual sex with strangers? Think about that? Why give someone another chance, who sees you as a beta bux? Why give someone your energy, when you're seen as weak chump who will take her back after being used and abused by all the men she's seeing?

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

I'm just fucking angry that she thinks I'm just a provider. That I'll embrace her with open arms again. I shouldn't have even let her speak to me for longer than 5 minutes yesterday.

[-] FeniZio94 14 Points 2 months ago

Nah man, don’t be a simp.

When it comes to these type of women, you just gotta show them who’s who... and she thinks she can put you in a beta bux place... so you gotta show her she ain’t nothing more than a disposable woman... she can get replaced, and with the insane oversupply of Sluts nowadays... very easily

That’s one of the reasons why when women wanna be “friends” with me I only tell them “only if you bring benefits to the table”, or that she’s just an acquaintance... no need to play games, and no need to give value somewhere which has no value

[-] Pharmpharm7 3 Points 2 months ago

Trust me, I have 0 female friends and plenty of plates for the same reason. I just don't see the point in letting her feel worthless. Either way we won't be getting back together so how she feels doesn't matter. I just don't want to be shitty to her because she was never shitty to me. I was going to get her a solid valentine's day gift but that's over though.

[-] DellaAbel 12 Points 2 months ago

She will 100% think about you on valentines day. Even if she gets you a gift bro, don't fuckin return the favour... She gets those benefits from dating you, and she needs to know that when you two aren't together, those benefits disappear. You gotta be strong, SHE made this choice. Also, never been shitty to you? She did what all girls do, randomly leave you for no good reason to go ride the cock carousel and determine their SMV. That sounds pretty shitty to me.

[-] Pharmpharm7 3 Points 2 months ago

Yeah I seriously thought about getting her something. That's over though. It is pretty shitty but I also understand that's female nature. It's like when a kid gets his hands in the mud. You don't chop off their hands for it, it's expected.

[-] Rondooooo 5 Points 2 months ago

You don't see the reason in letting her feel worthless? How?

Hasn't she made you feel worthless when she said you're nothing to her and she's missing out on what's out there because she's with you? This is her being an extremely shitty woman. She dropped a fucking nuke on your head.

You sound like a good man who's got his shit together. She will come crawling back one day after riding the CC. Something tells me you will probably take her back.

Hard next and be thankful you dodged a bullet.

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

You're right. It was very disrespectful. The thing is she thinks I'm going to be okay with taking her back like her dad was with her mom. I won't be. I don't know how to get that across.

[-] Frich3 5 Points 2 months ago

Don’t wanna be rude? I had to tell my best friend somethin similarly to what I’m about to tell you. But you don’t think it’s rude. You just want an excuse to see her message you. I mean you even said it in another reply. It’s ok man I feel for you. Though I’ve never been in a 4 year relationship. But I know it hurts. Thing is, you gottta be the man and cut it off. Women can’t. Because they want as many options as possible and will try to hang sex over your head. Cut her off completely and go find some women to put in your rotation.

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

She knows I have the ability to get laid if I want to. The problem now is that she thinks I might be okay with getting back together when she's done riding some new dicks. I won't be. I don't know how to get that across to her. I do want to see her message me, not going to lie.

[-] Frich3 3 Points 2 months ago

What’s the point in seeing her message you if you don’t want to be with her anymore? Cause trust me, the only reason she is breaking up with you is for someone else. Think she would tell Justin Bieber or Chris brown she wants to “take a break”? She just wants to test out dick and then come back. So why even entertain the idea by messaging her or possibly messaging her when you see her text? What logical excuse is there?

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

It happens with committed celebrities too bro. No one is immune. I won't be speaking to her for at least a month. My reasoning is that if she realizes she fucked up and gets over this phase quickly I might consider speaking to her again. If she waits years, it's 100% over. Regardless, I won't be responding to her ever again unless she begs me to come back and soon. This feels like the most insane shit test in the world.

[-] Frich3 2 Points 2 months ago

It’s not a shit test. She’s telling you what type of person she is and you refuse to believe her because you are stuck on her. What happens down the line when she wants to take a break for the next guy she is ogling? Or the next one? All you are doing is teaching her that her actions warrant not consequences for her behavior. I’ve seen this too many times so just don’t bother posting with an update down the line that you took her back only to have her cheat on you or do it again. Not angry but it’ll just be a waste of time to everyone who told you before hand exactly what she is doing. Goes to show you how little she respects you after 4 years of dating....

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

Yeah if she did this insane shit once, how do I know she won't do it again? If she ever texts me begging, that'll be my response.

[-] [deleted] 2 months ago
[-] VasiliyZaitzev 2 Points 2 months ago

I genuinely think she deserves better than getting blocked.

I genuinely think you should go punch yourself in the dick ten times for thinking this.

I'm going to let her message me and that'll be the end of it.

Why? So when she messages you you're going to think, "Oh, but SHE messaged ME, so it's ok to reply... [some other shit happens] ...and I can take her back." This sounds like you're Linus who wants his blankie.

Trust me, her family will let her know she fucked up for me.

Good. Then you can block away 'wif no problems 'bruv.

[-] Pharmpharm7 2 Points 2 months ago

Yeah I changed my mind. I blocked her.

[-] CoinMemo 37 Points 2 months ago

This is why I say people are only as loyal as their options, with the technology and society we have today, it is easy to put yourself out there and experience other people. Your girl was experiencing FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out) and wanted to leave the relationship so she can explore her options a bit more. There was nothing you can do, it is human nature, once she's "got it out of her system" or everthing has died out she will probably hit you up again to reminisce about "old times".

If you both lived in the middle of nowhere, the internet didn't exist and the government wasn't willing to play daddy, she would cling to you bro, simply off that the fact that are less opportunities to explore so the risk outweighs the reward. For your next relationship try to find out the motive behind your girls plan to go monogamous with you, is it out of a lack of options or due to her personal principles?

[-] Pharmpharm7 15 Points 2 months ago

All valid points. Dating apps have irreversibly fucked LTRs for the rest of time. My family is really religious. I'm somewhat religious. She really wasn't at all. Luckily for me, there's a lot of single ladies at several of our churches looking for a good dude with the same background and ethnicity. I'm going to wait a couple years if I ever I do another LTR though.

[-] CoinMemo 6 Points 2 months ago

You would be better off aligning yourself with a women who shares similar principles to you, judging by your situation you wanted to take things more serious after becoming financially stable whilst your girlfriend felt she was still young for a serious commitment.

Personally I agree with waiting longer before settling into a LTR, times have changed, the average life expectancy has increased and early marriage/settling doesn’t have the same benefits it had 100 years ago.

Who knows, maybe we just need to adapt to an ever evolving society, humans might live to be 1,000 years soon, if that happens settling down might not even be a goal for many people anymore.

Survival Of The Fittest = Species who successfully adapted to their environments

Just some food for thought

[-] rexdor2010 2 Points 2 months ago

My ex was a 23 yr old virgin when we started dating. She went to church, her mom was a literal jesus freak. She still ended up cheating on me.

Of those several ladies at your church, I'd bet more than half of them have already lost their virginity.

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

Yeah no one is trustworthy. The thing is, this actually makes me respect my girl even more. She was honest about it. Which makes me think if I should make this irreversible or not. Besides this shit, she was amazing and we really fucking enjoyed each other's company.

The job market for pharmacists is shitty in the northeast and literally a couple days before this happened, she was willing to move to Bumblefuck nowhere for my job with me if it came down to that (it didn't). You guys don't understand how good our relationship was up to this point.

[-] rexdor2010 2 Points 2 months ago

I completely understand where you're coming from. All the TRP shit aside, the reality is that she's in a place of emotional confusion.

If you can keep her faithful and loyal and not constantly looking over her should for something better... then by all means stay with her. It's possible for everything to work out and you two to be happily together. What everyone here is telling you, is that this is unlikely to happen, and that it's not worth you taking those chances.

If you believe that it really should be salvaged, then you need to proceed very carefully. Follow most of the advice in this thread, and handle things in a VERY abundant and non-desperate way. Make her come back to you and prove herself. Don't go back to her.

Also, because of what has happened, you would be very wise to limit your emotional investment/attachment to her. She has openly given a red flag that she doesn't want to be with you. So keep that in mind...

[-] Pharmpharm7 2 Points 2 months ago

Okay this is one of the realest comments so far.

I completely understand where you're coming from. All the TRP shit aside, the reality is that she's in a place of emotional confusion.

She is and so am I. I've never felt so confused in my life.

If you can keep her faithful and loyal and not constantly looking over her should for something better... then by all means stay with her. It's possible for everything to work out and you two to be happily together. What everyone here is telling you, is that this is unlikely to happen, and that it's not worth you taking those chances.

I know it's unlikely. The thing is, in a week she's probably going to ask for a break. She's scared of missing out. I'm not because I cheated..

That's why I think our case is unique. That maybe she's justified to do this, that this would balance out the psychological imbalance caused by my own cheating.

If you believe that it really should be salvaged, then you need to proceed very carefully. Follow most of the advice in this thread, and handle things in a VERY abundant and non-desperate way. Make her come back to you and prove herself. Don't go back to her.

Yeah I totally agree. When I get desperate, I writes notes on my phone but don't actually send them. I just edit them and imagine the conversation until I reach a mild form of mania (not actually) but I don't send it. But yeah that's the mindset I'll have.

Also, because of what has happened, you would be very wise to limit your emotional investment/attachment to her. She has openly given a red flag that she doesn't want to be with you. So keep that in mind...

No I think this might be a misunderstanding/misphrasing on your part. I still think she might want to be with me and will likely come back if we have a reversible break.

I know her relatively well and I know she probably just needs to play the field like I have for years behind her back. She is a better person than I am.

I think so much of trp and this situation has to do with pride and ego. That maybe if I can control mine, that we can get through this.

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

Fuck I already realize what's going to happen. I'm going to tell her our relationship is special. She won't believe me. I'll tell her yeah we might find other people. But the whole problem with this is that she's greedy. Greedy for what's out on the horizon. But we all know she won't be able to play that game forever. That level of dread and realization will just make her drift further from me as she realizes these are her best years to find a millionaire dude in their 30's like her older cousin did. And she probably will be able to find that person and live happily ever after because she actually is a great person. Man this sucks but I just need to hold on to whatever dignity I have left.

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

Did I do the right thing by blocking her on social media? I didn't want to give off a triggered vibe. Rather an abundance "I can do this too" vibe. That I showed her I'm not scared of losing her.

[-] AusSK 29 Points 2 months ago

You're right, it is different when it happens to you, but remember that ultimately it's her loss. Channel the pain towards productive things, never stop improving yourself. Understand that she is done. Cut all contact and start spinning plates.

[-] Pharmpharm7 6 Points 2 months ago

I know there's always someone taller, fitter, richer, better looking etc but you're right, there's always room for improvement on my end. I'm just curious what else she plans to say to me after four years. I won't block her just yet but I won't initiate contact either. And I'm way ahead of way of you, I've been spinning plates.

[-] zealanderx 11 Points 2 months ago

He's the thing though. Girls don't always upgrade or need some one better. Sometimes they just want something different. Different.

I would recommend blocking her on social media just so you're not creeping on her. No need to be rude about it

[-] Pharmpharm7 4 Points 2 months ago

Yeah I understand. I wonder how quickly she's going to realize that different can be a lot worse. Yeah no need to be rude, she asked for a break and trust me she's going to get it.

[-] p3n1x 8 Points 2 months ago

I have read a few of your replies....don't be "curious" about the last words. Neither of your brains have fully developed yet, so don't guess what negative outcomes could occur for her, thats butthurt toxic thinking.

Her "next" guy will be 20 years older.

So, move on, enjoy everything ahead of you.

[-] omen_tenebris 1 Point 2 months ago

This. Just read the war brides post on the rational male

[-] [deleted] 2 months ago
[-] flapjacksrbetter 29 Points 2 months ago

My man dodged a bullet. Be grateful that she wanted to break up now not divorce rape u. Cant turn a hoe into a housewife ????‍♂️

[-] Pharmpharm7 5 Points 2 months ago

I am extremely thankful. It would have fucked up my family too if they found out I was seeing someone behind their backs for so long.

[-] philltered 1 Point 2 months ago

Uhh it's good that you internalize all these comments but the family thing is just an unnecessary correlation that you are now coming up with. You do not have to feel guilty or scared or worried for anyone finding about anything. Stop hamstering about family lol.

Congrats on your new life!

[-] SuperCrazy07 28 Points 2 months ago

Few thoughts:

  1. I think you’re overestimating your relationship market value. You’re 24. You can’t compete with successful guys a few years older than you. If she’s as hot as you say, she will be able to get better.

  2. Here’s the upside - you’re on your way. In a few years you’ll be the guy the 24 yo hotties dump their guy for.

  3. Upside (x10) - in 20 years, trust me. I don’t care what this bitch does with her life, you will not be attracted to her. You’ll be banging a much younger, hotter chick and barely remembering the bullet you dodged at 24.

  4. As I mentioned in a previous comment, stop fixating on the fantasy of her seeing your success in 10 years and regretting her decision. It doesn’t work like that, so don’t waste your energy on it.
[-] Pharmpharm7 6 Points 2 months ago

You're right I won't waste my energy on it. I know my value isn't the best. I'm good looking but I also have loans and I could be fitter. I think objectively speaking, I'm a 6.5 and she's maybe a 5.5-6 out of 10 according to the sub true rate me's standards.

[-] MadSalty 18 Points 2 months ago

it's time for you to PUMP and DUMP!

[-] Pharmpharm7 17 Points 2 months ago

I warned her, if we take a "break" there's a good chance I won't be there for her when she decides to come back. I really was considering taking the relationship to the next level but I don't know if I ever could with her or anyone now. Fuck.

I should have known though. Her mom did the same shit. Met a great guy early on and decided he wasn't the one for her. Years later, they got married. I don't think I can do that though.

[-] heartbroken_nerd 17 Points 2 months ago

Your blood runs blue from all the blue pill indoctrination that's still in your system. You need to sweat, piss and shit it out, seriously.

What you're describing is one of the worst lies ever told to men: that the capacity to self-sacrifice is a value that shall be rewarded.

First of all, it is not a 'value'. Rather, it's a liability.

Secondly, it will never be rewarded; hell, it won't even be appreciated. Why? Because it is a highway to disrespect. If you don't respect and value YOURSELF above all else, why would the woman you just sacrificed yourself for respect you? It is the great paradox.

You can sacrifice yourself so that she can have a better life, but she will neither appreciate it nor reward it and you will become miserable for it, or you can make selfish choices and low-key abuse (as you put it, enjoy her best years without committing) the woman that is the dearest to you and reap the rewards even if she tells everyone she hates how much of a jerk you are for not fulfilling her narrative.

The only way to win this game is to not play.

[-] Pharmpharm7 2 Points 2 months ago

I get what you're saying but it would have been nice to have kids some day. That's probably not going to be in my future now.

[-] heartbroken_nerd 5 Points 2 months ago

This is tricky and above my pay grade, so to speak. I have no kids and I have no desire to have kids.

I can only imagine the painful realisation that your dream of nuclear family will never come true. Still, there are some options one can explore including surrogate mother of some sort (or whatever a formal way to 'hire a mother' is called) with clearly outlined rules. That, or you find a girl who will give you a kid without your commitment (no marriage) but you have to be okay with what this means in case shit goes sideways.

[-] Pharmpharm7 2 Points 2 months ago

Yeah I'm just really repulsed with ever getting in an LTR again. I'd be lying if I said it didn't hurt. I'll probably wait until I'm 30 before I ever think about this again, sorry mom and dad. They might to have to look to my younger brother for grandkids now.

[-] ass_boy 6 Points 2 months ago

Chill you're 24 life isnt over. You'll probably wanna get back in a ltr in 6 months

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

Nah I think I'll be okay fucking around for a couple years guilt free. She honestly did me a favor. My bank account thanks her as well.

[-] MiZiSTiK 5 Points 2 months ago

Lol you were cheating on her then you're in the comments like a little beta pussy playing the victim. Grow the fuck up

[-] crimsonkodiak 3 Points 2 months ago

Dude, you're 24. No reason to jump on the kid bandwagon now. Heck, you can have kids if you're 60 if you want.

You have your entire life ahead of you. If you're making 6 figures now, take advantage of it. Get an apartment with your buddies in a cool part of town. It will still cost you less than living alone and WAY less than it would cost living with her. Bank as much as you can, while having as much fun as you can. If you decide to get married in 6 years (which is still young), you'll have $300K in the bank that will always be yours.

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

Great advice. My parents know this too so I don't know why they keep harrasing me about it.

[-] crimsonkodiak 2 Points 2 months ago

Blue pill societal expectation that's a vestige of a time when cultural norms were for people to marry young, have kids and stay with the same person their entire life.

You don't need to do that now. Life expectancies are longer and there's lots of single or divorced people in the dating pool. It might seem like you invested time with her, but that implies that you lost something. You didn't - you're more marketable now than you were when you were 20 and will be even more marketable when you're 30. If you want to get married and have kids then, there won't be a shortage of women. If you could find an LTR then, you'll find one when you're 30.

But don't forget to lift. Makes it way easier.

[-] Pharmpharm7 2 Points 2 months ago

Yeah I totally agree. I'll be in my 30's before I consider getting into another one.

[-] Shady-mofo 1 Point 2 months ago

Dude you’re 24, having kids and getting married should be the last things on your mind right now

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

You're right. My parents just keep harrasing me about it and it resulted in the stupid conversation that ended my 4 year relationship.

[-] TheMightyLeftNut 13 Points 2 months ago

Stay strong, bro. It is her loss after all. I wish you the best!

[-] [deleted] 2 months ago
[-] TheGreatGatzb 5 Points 2 months ago

It’s not that it’s a “good chance.” There is NO chance moving forward with that bitch.

Remember that once a woman is demoted in the hierarchy you create, she can not climb back to her old position. She is forever stuck in the position she is demoted to.

In this case,

Hard next, block, & fuck 10 new bitches

Never speak to her again

Her Loss

[-] whatdidshewrite 15 Points 2 months ago

Sometimes breaking up is a dumb decision on behalf of the person doing the breaking up, just like in this case. Not all women are relationship minded in these young years - most of them haven’t matured to that period yet.

On the other hand, you seem much more mature than average for your age. So don’t worry about it. You didn’t do anything wrong. Keep doing what you’re doing. Chances are you would have come across some other abrasion as a result of your differences in maturity levels.

I guarantee 10 years from now when she’s hit the wall she’s gonna be like “shit I fucked up” on reference to you. Meanwhile you’ll eventually find a girl wise enough to stick around.

[-] Pharmpharm7 10 Points 2 months ago

Thank you brother, that makes me feel a bit better about myself. I'll admit deep down I did have similar thoughts as her but I always thought that was such a stupid reason. She even said verbatim, "I wish we met 2 years from now." The problem is, I don't think I'll be willing to take her back after she's ridden the CC for two years. I even dropped a TRP bomb on her. I told her it was actually a positive that we met when we were young and didn't have astronomical n counts. I told her a lot of guys agree with me but she just said I was old fashioned. I guess she'll soon find out for herself what guys really value.

[-] whatdidshewrite 2 Points 2 months ago

She’s just young and dumb. It depends on the pool you pull from in my experience. In my law school, most women are about serious relationships. Very few sleep around and good luck fucking on the first/second date.

Funny enough, this is so much so that the majority of guys have forgone law school women in favour of the undergrads because they know the undergrads are so much easier.

[-] heartbroken_nerd 11 Points 2 months ago

You're so naive.

Very few sleep around

No, they just hide it better.

Very few sleep around and good luck fucking on the first/second date.

No, they don't fuck YOU on the first/second date.

Now, objectively - sure they want that obedient yet high value boyfriend to benefit from his status, but the only difference here is that they aim for the absolute best and don't settle for scraps. However, sex with no strings attached is likely to occur when the stars align and she's away from prying eyes, outside her social circle.

[-] SteroidsFreak 1 Point 2 months ago

^ this I agree. She sees some dude who isn't in law school, gyms, works on himself, and does what he wants. Course she's guns go have fun with him. Lol

[-] Pharmpharm7 4 Points 2 months ago

Yeah that makes sense. I recently graduated from pharmacy school and it was a little similar. She only has her undergraduate degree and is currently working as a waitress. I really could have given her a decent life. I knew this day could come but it still caught me a bit off guard. Her parents are going to be angry as fuck at the decision she just made.

[-] heartbroken_nerd 10 Points 2 months ago

What the fuck is this sub turning into?

Meanwhile you’ll eventually find a girl wise enough to stick around.

Are you fucking serious right now? What does it matter whether the girl sticks around or not? Do you mean she sticks around long enough for him to give up his life and wife her up?

Are we giving the advice to the man in question or to the woman in question? Because you sound like you're cheering him up by saying "Don't worry, you'll get a chance to become a slave to someone else soon enough. :)"

Marriage is a dumb goal to have.

[-] Pharmpharm7 2 Points 2 months ago

The thing is, that's the only culturally appropriate and responsible way to have kids, which I wanted. I understand that's probably not ever going to be in my future now.

[-] oooKenshiooo 4 Points 2 months ago

She’s just young and dumb. It depends on the pool you pull from in my experience. In my law school, most women are about serious relationships. Very few sleep around and good luck fucking on the first/second date.Funny enough, this is so much so that the majority of guys have forgone law school women in favour of the undergrads because they know the undergrads are so much easier.

Relax man, I'm 31 and while I am open to having kids, there really is no rush. Just get a hot 22 y.o. when you are 35 and make some tiny pharmacists.

[-] [deleted] 2 months ago
[-] Frich3 1 Point 2 months ago

I hear you but you really don’t think they are relationship minded? I bet if Justin Bieber or Brad Pitt wanted to marry them they would on the spot. It’s just she wasn’t willing to do it for OP. Atleast that’s my flawed way of thinking. I’m a bit cynical though so take what I say w/ a grain of salt

[-] redditer0 9 Points 2 months ago

"no matter how happy we are, she can just come up with something as simple as that and call it quits."

This can happen to anyone. Not only to men

[-] Pharmpharm7 2 Points 2 months ago

Yeah in the dating world, the business world, and life in general. Brutal shit happens and there's nothing we can do about it.

[-] SlimeWizard 9 Points 2 months ago

Bull shit you know she’s been loyal those four years. I’d enjoy knowing what 6 figure salary the 24 yr old landed

[-] Pharmpharm7 4 Points 2 months ago

Of course I don't know but if she was cheating she wouldn't have said some of the things she said. And it's low 6 figures right now.

[-] Memo_From_Turner 7 Points 2 months ago

Jesus jumping christ, she’s a waitress -and only a 6- and she just broke up with a guy pulling six figs? She just shredded her winning lottery ticket because it felt “freeing”.

She’s in for a life of being casually sexually harassed day-in and day-out by grubby old male customers, going on crappy tinder dates with blue pill guys, and wondering where all the good men went. I know it’s hard to believe now, but once the sting wears off you will never look back. In ten years she’ll be a plain-looking cow you wouldn’t look twice at in the supermarket. If you keep self-improving, you’ll be a rich guy juggling 9’s and 10’s.

Each day you’ll think about her a little less, and eventually you have no reason to think about her at all.

Any time one of my bros in an LTR gets broken up with, I refer them to this song and it helps them a lot https://youtu.be/GRP6XpQSheQ. Might not be your music genre taste but every lyric is the ultimate post-LTR mantra

[-] MrGreySD 0 Points 2 months ago

Feminine men singing in high pitched voices about breakups?

[-] Memo_From_Turner 1 Point 2 months ago

Feminine men singing in high pitched voices about breakups?

Yeah real alphas, when not listening to Rammstein, always walk around wearing earmuffs to prevent any estrogen from seeping in through the ear canals.

Jk yeah these guys kinda sound like whiny pansies to me these days. But the lyrics are the mindset you need to have after an LTR. Take a hard pass on the “let’s still be friends” crap, have her know that walking out the door means it’s actually done for good & she’s completely cut off. You’re not gonna sit around moping about her, you’re gonna go spin other plates. Don’t let her come knocking again when she finds the CC isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. Don’t let her turn you into one of her orbiters that she can summon for sex w/ the ex on nights when she’s feeling lonely and her other connects didn’t hit her back up. And yeah if you’d let yourself get too deep into oneitis, trust that each day the chemicals forcing you to feel that way will die down more & more until eventually they’re gone

[-] SlimeWizard 1 Point 2 months ago

I meant job not the digits, weird wording

[-] Pharmpharm7 5 Points 2 months ago

Registered pharmacist in the northeast. Came with loans though

[-] SlimeWizard 3 Points 2 months ago

Eesh yeah. Keep building brother

[-] SKRedPill 8 Points 2 months ago

The grass always looks greener on the other side. But the last time I read a story about a woman who did this in a marriage (against her own family's advice), she ended up childless and unmarried and full of regrets.

In between she realized she could never really let go of her ex (sexual memory cannot be forgotten with impunity), and she kept trying to get back to him even after he remarried and had a family of his own. But he moved on and cut her out of his new life. Now all she has are cats for company and unable to digest her regrets.

"She wants to grow" - nah, she just wants the addiction, and she probably has it lined up. Those who keep seeking never find. This FOMO is yet another mental illness.

Karma's a bitch.

[-] Pharmpharm7 3 Points 2 months ago

Well put. My own mother is the same way. Never satisfied with life, always wanting something more no matter what she has. My parents have stayed married though because of our culture and religion.

We had a beautiful thing but I think it's ruined.

[-] IllegibleWorkbook 7 Points 2 months ago

Congrats on your 6 figure job at 24 flex. I too thought money was everything, did the house thing, 2 of them! lol. Nice cars! Lol 2 of them! Worked all the fuckin time which im sure you do too. I'm 32.. lemme tell you young brother... women only care about how much money you have right now (meaning that day and moment in time).. not how much you're going to save later. If you wanna get some hot fuck or future frugal girl, get a van and rebuild it and go camp on the west coast for a year. You'll find all the hot nature girls you could ever imagine that also like to live cheap and small. There's independent women out there, they're just independent and living and not spending their time in the same rat race you think... there's great girls out there man.

[-] Self-honest 6 Points 2 months ago

I love the outpouring of support l and I agree it's no contact or bust, but I want to point out something I haven't seen anyone touch on yet..

I love your overall attitude but you are glossing over the most important lesson here because in your own words

I'd rather not get into that though.

It sucks, embrace the suck.

What triggered this conversation and her anxiety was that I had just landed the job and was ready to introduce her to family for things to get serious.

Error. You initiated a push for commitment. She lost attraction and decided that she must be able to do better than you. You know...since there are other high value males who aren't just giving away commitment for free like that.

I understand the trajectory you were on in your head, but you have to understand that this was your fault in order to avoid making the same mistake in the future.

Regardless, despite my reading of the red pill, this experience has scared me a little bit. It's different when you're the one experiencing it.

Totally scary when you don't realize what caused it. Which it seems like you're hamstering away in favor of the merciless AWALT sky monster.

It scared me because it proves that no matter what I do and no matter how happy we are, she can just come up with something as simple as that and call it quits.

Don't fucking do that shit again ever with any woman. It made her second guess everything. You gave up the prize. How can she work hard in an everlasting pursuit of the prize when she gets it for free, with a nice salary bonus for no extra effort at all?

Lesson over. Good luck bro. I'm sure you will bounce wayyyyy back. Enjoy your new found freedom. Smash away. Amen.

[-] Pharmpharm7 2 Points 2 months ago

Yeah you're right. I fucked up bringing up this conversation. That's all it was. One fucking conversation at a restaurant. I wasn't in the right state of mind. I had gotten the job offer over the phone that day. We were so excited and happy. I let my guard down in my ecstacy like a fucking beta. Of course she was going to bring up that conversation herself eventually. One mistake after 4 years of maintaining frame and it all goes to shit. Wow.

Like I said to some other guys, I think she did me a favor so maybe I shouldn't be upset I brought up the conversation.

[-] Self-honest 6 Points 2 months ago

Dig deeper. You're not there yet.

It wasn't bringing up the conversation that was your downfall. It was wanting to.

You spent how long using red pill tactics to achieve blue pill goals?

One mistake after 4 years of maintaining frame and it all goes to shit. Wow.

You were faking your frame for four years. Then you slipped up. Congrats on making it that far. Don't fake your frame then you can't slip up. Be congruent with your desires.

TRP teaches you to aim for pussy. Let her aim for commitment. That's the only way it will ever work out for you. If she had bought into your plan, she still would have lost attraction, but she would have stuck it out for long enough to get that money

You have one job. Build attraction, maintain attraction. Fuck. Repeat. With as many girls as you can.

Get out there and make us all proud.

[-] Pharmpharm7 2 Points 2 months ago

Tbh my frame would come and go over the years. I would have been okay fucking around for a couple more years. My parents turned me to a fucking simp when I lived with them. Every other fucking day I would hear a "joke" from family about when I would eventually bring a girl home. It eventually got to me and led to me having the convo with her.

[-] Self-honest 3 Points 2 months ago

There it is. See your blue pill conditioning in action and reject it. You will get that same crabs in a bucket mentality everywhere. If you're not careful to recognize it and reject it, it will get the best of you.

[-] Pharmpharm7 2 Points 2 months ago

It has. It just sucks that one slip up might have fucked over years of work. I'm not going to reply to her inevitable messages for a month or two or more. It feels like I'm going through the hardest shit test in the world right now. That she wants to see how I react. Am I beta that's going to beg her to come back? Or do I know I can do much better than her and not even bother replying for months.

[-] Self-honest 1 Point 2 months ago

You're regressing.

It just sucks that one slip up might have fucked over years of work.

Years of work at what? Your blue pill goals? It wasn't one slip up that was the problem. It was your hidden thought process the whole time.

What did you lose? In my opinion you just gained a great deal.

I'm not going to reply to her inevitable messages for a month or several.

Never dude. It's over. She knows who you are now, there is no going back in her mind. If she comes back to you it will be to take you for half of your worth. Resource drain. Be your own mental point of origin. Why would you ever respond to someone who wants to leave the life you have been building for her to go get some strange dick and try to find someone better than you?

[-] Pharmpharm7 2 Points 2 months ago

She's knows that I'm what? A responsible man looking to have kids and a family some day? It's not such a fucking weird thing to want man. I just want to have a family one day like everyone else. I hate this so much.

I was never building my life for her. It was always for myself. I was just inviting her to join me in it.

[-] Self-honest 1 Point 2 months ago

I hate this so much.

Embrace the suck. Red pills aren't fun going down.

Maybe some ECs, u/itiswr1tten and u/VasiliyZaitzev, who have been commenting can jump in and explain this a little better than I can.

I see u/MattyAnon already covered it pretty succinctly for you.

The bottom line is, you can't win like that.

She's knows that I'm what?

Someone who caused her to lose attraction. Call it blue pill, beta, whatever you want. She won't easily forget that feeling and it's not worth the effort with millions of other girls out there.

[-] itiswr1tten 3 Points 2 months ago

He's gotten all the advice he needs. Time to let him stew. No one gets this shit overnight, he needs to grieve for awhile.

TRP isn't real until you get fucked over just like we said you would. Until then, the fantasy that she is a unicorn or you are alpha beef Supreme perpetuates until it's violently shattered.

[-] Pharmpharm7 2 Points 2 months ago

Yeah she looked at me differently yesterday when we talked. I would almost describe it as her eyes were subtly angry or repulsed at my very existence with me laying on her bed. She gave me a look I hadn't seen in the entirety of our relationship.

It's a horrible realization but I know she has lost attraction and I will not fight for it. I have blocked her on social media to send the message that I am the prize and that she was nothing but another whore. If she wants to text my phone she can but I will not respond until late March or April. This is a promise I am keeping to myself.

[-] [deleted] 2 months ago
[-] Olongapo 5 Points 2 months ago

Yo, Pharmpharm7, No contact is the way to go. Not to teach her a lesson or somehow make her miss you and beg to come back. In her mind, you're gone and you've been gone awhile. She branch swung long before dropping this on you (you'll probably find this out later). No contact is for you to come to grips with the fact that it was just your turn and to address the pain and loss of having your "one-itis" disappear. Closure ain't gonna happen. Staying friends ain't gonna happen. Her coming back ain't gonna happen. She's with some other guy right now wondering why she didn't do this earlier. You're nothing to her. I would recommend that you delete and block her from all of your social media and phone (so you can't go and peak 'cause you're gonna want to do that) and lick your wounds. No contact is you giving yourself time to heal. That's all it's there for but it takes serious discipline. u/itiswritten has given you a template. Follow the prescription and learn from this valuable lesson. Shut your own hamster down. There is no value in playing the "if only" game nor re-establishing contact. You'll drive yourself crazy. Re-read the sidebars.

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

Thanks for the advice. I'll be coming back to this often. I won't be restarting contact. If I feel that it's getting painful to still have her on Fb and the like, I'll block her.

[-] alittletoosmooth 5 Points 2 months ago

I'm in my early 30s. Every single girl I've had a LTR with, when I look back now, I'm thankfully it ended. My life has done nothing but improve year after year.

She did you a favor. Go fuck vajeen like your life depends on it.

[-] Nov51605 4 Points 2 months ago

AWALT girl pooped her diaper Ruh roh.

[-] Pharmpharm7 2 Points 2 months ago

I didn't know it was possible for hypergamy to fuck up this badly on her end.

[-] awalt_cupcake 10 Points 2 months ago

red pill agent reporting in. Hypergamy is blind. If she feels someone else out there is better, then it's true.

Also modern feminism has done a number making women autistic to these things. I've been in a similar situation as you wondering why in the world would someone turn all this down? Especially after she put effort to get it? Today's "Thank You, Next" entitlement is drilled in their heads. If she thinks she can get it, she wants what's next. If she's not having fun, she wants what's next. If you sneezed the wrong way, she wants what's next. See where I'm going with this?

Hypergamy is a subconscious strategy women do to secure a high quality man. Subconscious and easily tricked by feelings and male pea-cocking. Like birds swooping in to pick up shiny rocks because they glittered in the sunlight when in fact, they risked it all for an aluminum beer cap reflecting the sun.

[-] Nov51605 2 Points 2 months ago

This is her first attempt at hypergamy it seems. Failed attempt

[-] R3v4mp3d 4 Points 2 months ago

Although many in this sub will denigrate her for what she did, I truly believe she is a gem of a girl. I'm glad you were with her and I'm happy that it ended that way. Being loyal to you, honest with you but also loyal and honest to herself shows A LOT of integrity. Doing it before you get the job and take her to your relatives -> even more respect for her. Man I'm on the edge of suggesting that you tell her "let's have a tea in 4 years and see where we stand then". She's the kind of girl that I'd think fondly of even decades down the line. Congratulations for such a catch.

Before everyone shits on my opinion: I did EXACTLY what she did for EXACTLY the same reason, EXACTLY at the same age as you guys were. When you have a world to explore yet you're not a hoe and approach the situation tactfully and in a thought out manner AND you're a girl who on average just gives in to impulses, urges and emotions BUT you don't -> she has class.

Edit: a word.

[-] Pharmpharm7 2 Points 2 months ago

Yeah she had a lot of good qualities and I'm thankful for it. I had to show strength and block her though. I don't think I'll be okay with taking her back after she did some "exploring". It genuinely repulses me on a new level.

[-] R3v4mp3d 2 Points 2 months ago

I understand the feeling, but it's a little hypocritical to want as a man to pop 100 cherries and when you decide to "settle down" to get a wife whose cherry was never popped. I'm not advocating to go for women who've seen more than ~10 dicks, but excluding a girl for seeing ~5 is a little absurd. Based on how and what you described, I doubt that in the next 4 years she'll be renowned for riding the CC. Your case is a grey area imo, but I'm generally an optimist. :)

[-] Pharmpharm7 2 Points 2 months ago

Yeah I told her about how some girls that fuck 30 or 40 guys aren't as respected. She said that number was just ridiculous. She's already seen 4 dicks I believe. She'll be well over ten by the time she hits the wall though. I just feel so disrespected...

[-] R3v4mp3d 1 Point 2 months ago

Hmmm. Please be honest: did you have few relationships (sexual and nonsexual) before her?

[-] Pharmpharm7 2 Points 2 months ago

Only sexual

[-] R3v4mp3d 1 Point 2 months ago

You had only a few sexual ones but no relationships?

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

I had a long-term fwb before.

[-] R3v4mp3d 1 Point 2 months ago

Well, that sounds like a relationship. I don't know the details but my idea way to see your N count. What I notice is that men get more jaded the more their heart gets broken. This won't make you hate women but breakups leave you as a mess of a person. After each breakup, it will take more to open up and be emotionally invested than in the previous relationship. Here there will be a triage for me: some will go "extra TRP" and just objectify women to the max, others will have a more passionate and loving relationship when they open up since the experience somehow grows them emotionally, and of course there are also people in between. Source?: personal experience going through the same thing. :)

Try not to beat yourself or her over it. For now you need to find balance, and later to think what your next move is gonna be.

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

I'm already on my next moves. Have a dating app with matches and it's going well. I'm just so nauseous. It feels like I'm about to give a presentation but constantly. I'm probably never going to open up to another LTR. I can't risk this shit happening again out of nowhere.

[-] markinsinz7 1 Point 2 months ago

Wut. She'll be over 10 by the end of the year mate. Guys seriously don't realise how many random guys girls fuck around with.

Your gonna have some lonely ass nights for the following weeks like say 3-4 days of the week alone your ex will have at least 1 FWB right away and then do fun stuff on the weekends with occasional 1 night stands. Once a girl reaches the stage your ex did their done as far as ltr material goes.

PS: even at 35 when she's all use up and shit she'll stI'll manage to find some alpha dick or rich beta provider or and complete beta schmuck. Either way point being don't take any joy in her making this stupid decision and 'missing out' on you.

You got a 6 figure salary? 1st thing I recommend is take a 4 day week off at a near weekend and do something completely new and fun with NO pussy desire whatsoever. Go on a road trip or skiing or sky diving whatevr- something brand new just for you.

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

I'm talking to girls right now but I'm still so upset. You're right she'll get her numbers up stupid fast and stupid high. Fuck.

Makes me want to just message her and try and fucking stop this. I'm so fucking hurt.

[-] legitniga 4 Points 2 months ago

Girls don’t say this out of nowhere, even when things are “getting more serious.”

She has found another guy, or at least she has a guy in her sights that she wants to pursue.

This one might be hard for you to accept/internalize right now, but you’ll see and understand it in time.

[-] daniellederek 4 Points 2 months ago

Mark the date on the calender. Remind yourself to thank her out loud every 5 years for this wake up call.

If you do the smart moves. Live humble. Don't get caught up in things and flashy cars. Show up at work every day and do your damn job.you should have 30k a year to bank and invest. Pay yourself first now and by 45 you'll have fuck you money bankrolled. Then you'll have the pick of ant 25 year old just out of college girlfriend you choose to afford in your life.

[-] Pharmpharm7 2 Points 2 months ago

That was beautiful, thank you. I have a fuck ton of loans that might take 4-5 years to pay off on my salary and if I live at home. After that though, it's stocks and real estate till the cows come home. Maybe a porsche cayman somewhere in between if I find a good deal.

[-] daniellederek 0 Points 2 months ago

Porche. Ick. Get a 73-87 chevy square body. You can make money with it on the side and be hero moving your buds away from their shitty ex's. Tons of em out there ls swapped and ppl give up on the project and dump them for half what they put in.

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[-] saltyafrican 1 Point 2 months ago

Who knows what's gonna happen now with TenCent China investing $200m in Reddit

[-] Trenned_out 3 Points 2 months ago

24 banking 6 figures, about to introduce her to family and get serious.

​

Look I get you're hurting after that long of a relationship, red pill or not we all have motions. But honestly, bro in a few years you'll want to write this bitch a thank you note. She just made your life so much better in the long term. Opened up SO many doors to you. Think of all the experiences you'll now have that you never would have otherwise. Also I'd do some self reflection, sounds like the typical sheep life path is pretty ingrained in you if getting an awesome job made you want to get more serious with your gf and "grow up."

​

Time to get a nice downtown apartment near a lot of bars and restaurants, start enjoying the status of the job and money, as well as the logistic boost that being able to afford an awesome location gives you. And above all, start slaying.

[-] Pharmpharm7 2 Points 2 months ago

Thanks for the feedback. I have some loans that need to get paid off though so I'll be working on that for the foreseeable future.

[-] Trenned_out 2 Points 2 months ago

Good luck man. It may not seem like it now but you have nothing but opportunity ahead of you right now.

[-] Robster25 3 Points 2 months ago

Regardless, despite my reading of the red pill, this experience has scared me a little bit. It's different when you're the one experiencing it. It scared me because it proves that no matter what I do and no matter how happy we are, she can just come up with something as simple as that and call it quits.

I know it's very tough, especially when you have spent 4 years together, but I'm really happy for you, that you make this experience at this early age. Many guys realize this much later. Besides that you have achieved a lot and should be proud of yourself!

She mentioned that deep down she wanted to explore what else is out there and to grow as a person from that.

Everytime I hear something like that, I'm shaking my head at how retarded some (or all?) women are. How can you believe that you grow as a person when you're fucking dozens of guys? For a woman it is no achievement to get fucked. Just show up, spread your legs and say "Here I am!"... For men growing involves struggle and women believe they grow by getting fucked?

Besides that don't take anything seriously she says when breaking up with you. She is only looking for arguments which make sense to you, so you don't fight her over the breakup.

​

​

[-] rekabis 3 Points 2 months ago

She can and will come sniffing around again, especially after she has hit the wall. Happened to me nearly two decades later.

Always leave the door firmly shut. She closed it - never let her re-open it!!

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

It's really fucking disrespectful. The fact that she thinks she can fuck tens, hundreds or even thousands of guys then come crawling back to me when she realizes she fucked up and needs a provider.

[-] FeniZio94 2 Points 2 months ago

No point in making her feel worthless... when she is worthless

[-] Pharmpharm7 5 Points 2 months ago

I'm a firm believer of capitalism. I'm going to let the market tell her what she's worth.

[-] redditer0 1 Point 2 months ago

She's probably worth a lot right now.

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

Probably worth more than me tbh. I'm 24 and got a good job but I still have a ton of student loans too. My net worth isn't shit right now. On the other hand, she's in her prime and a cute blonde in her mid 20s. So good for her. This is better than each of us resenting each other for never exploring and not seeing other people.

[-] xachariah 3 Points 2 months ago

Depreciating Asset vs Appreciating Asset, broenheim.

Now it's just on you to make sure you appreciate in value.

[-] SteroidsFreak 1 Point 2 months ago

The more I read your responses, the more I start realizing that you validate yourself through money and put her on a pedestal. 1st of all take all the money away and what happens? Would you see yourself the same way? Would you think positive about yourself? Would you be happy with yourself? Would you love yourself for who you are? Bro right now is the best time to work on yourself. To be alone and appreciate who you are, how far you have come. Etc. Yes shit happens, she left, cry, be sad, internalize those feelings, once you release all those internal emotions, move on. Pick yourself back up, listen to some motivational shit and quit seeking external validations. So what if you broke, doesn't mean u can't pull or get laid. Who fucking cares. You're working on yourself and girls love that shit

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

You'd be right too. A lot of guys focus on different things when they grow. My focus has always been about money because when I was growing up, we didn't have too much of it. I always envied those people with a lot of money, the infinite problems it could solve. Looking at life through an objective lens will show you that no matter what fucking happens, having money will always be better than not having money

[-] SteroidsFreak 0 Points 2 months ago

Money only brings happiness if the person who has the money is happy with how himself. Look at you, making six figures and still not happy. Can't even get the right girl. Just shows that money doesn't bring u happiness

[-] [deleted] 2 months ago
[-] zealanderx 3 Points 2 months ago

This is a really odd thing to say about a girl op had by accounts here, a good relationship with for four years.

She wants to "see what's out there." Maybe it will work out really well for her and she'll find someone that makes her even happier or a lifestyle she enjoys more. OP says he's got lots of boxes checked that say he's a great guy. Souns like he is. What if he's really boring to her?

Maybe it will end up poorly for her. Who knows?

Where did you come up with she's worthless? Bizarre. People are people. I've broken up with girls who were A+ on most people's checklists... Either I was bored or needed something new.

[-] Pharmpharm7 2 Points 2 months ago

I really tried my best to mix up the sex. Both of us orgasmed every single time at least once. She is definitely a great girl and it might work out for her. If that happens, then congratulations to her.

[-] FeniZio94 0 Points 2 months ago

My only question is...

Why are you trying to defend clear whore behavior ?

[-] zealanderx 3 Points 2 months ago

Well I'll go one more against better judgment. The "why" now is an opportunity for a teachable moment which I'm sure will fall upon deaf ears.

You don't have all the information here. Maybe OP is really boring. Maybe the thought of her (GF) locking down the first man she got a hold of until death do them apart sounds like an unwise prospect to her. It does to me. Lifelong monogomy to me is a a total waste of a great opportunity in my opinion. Sounds miserable.

She's supposed to disagree because she a woman? Maybe she made a mistake. We don't know.

AWALT means AWALT man, from my observations there is real merit to this notion. To me, it doesn't come close to saying, "all women are worthless whores". If your emotional reaction to women acting natural is to become so angry and resentful.... You're going to have a very poor time navigating the intricacies and fruits from the pleasures of the opposite sex

Know, experience AWALT and feminine energy... When you are in a situation; notice, observe and respond in the wisest method available to your faculty.

OP seems to have made out well. I hope she was a real hotty. He's in a good place and now he's OUT and free. Glory

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

I got rated on the true rate me subreddit. I was told I was a 6.5 a couple of times. I think she would be a 5.5-6 by that sub's stupid high standards.

[-] FeniZio94 -1 Point 2 months ago

That still isn’t defending whore behavior :P, it just shows me the obvious about “how she made mistakes and such” (just like any feminist would justify that behavior)... you literally have not given me one single factual answer as to why you’re justifying it

[-] philosophe98 3 Points 2 months ago

I’ll bite. Looks like he’s saying your assumptions are unsubstantiated. The principles of AWALT/hypergamy don’t mean every woman is a worthless slut. Instead, they’re founded on evolutionary bio, psych/sociology, etc. and understanding that empowers us with a framework that’ll maximize enjoyment in our interactions/relationships with women.

​

More importantly, you won’t be caught off guard when women act irrationally. Instead you’ll use this insight to analyze the situation and act accordingly (which will improve you in the long-run if you reflect objectively).

​

Also, just my opinion but if this girl really was loyal and gave OP a solid 4 years, it wouldn't be unreasonable for him to respond and end things officially if she reaches out. Seems more respectable than blocking if it was a good run. Maybe she'll regret acting on the FOMO, maybe she won't. It won't matter because OP will continue building his life with a little more experience under his belt.

[-] SteroidsFreak 2 Points 2 months ago

Well fucking said. Exactly. No need to block her. If he keeps his frame neutral with head up high and move on. She will come back, that's when he will have the option to either keep improving on himself or fall back. He can keep her as a friend and thats it. He can bang other women and still talk to her without showing any interest in her anymore. She will either beg for him back at that point, or she will move on. That's how it works

[-] FeniZio94 1 Point 2 months ago

At least one logical answer

[-] [deleted] 2 months ago
[-] SteroidsFreak 1 Point 2 months ago

This the type of mentality that sure as hell won't get you laid. Who care if she wants to sleep around, women can do it and so can men. Nothin wrong with that brah.

[-] FeniZio94 1 Point 2 months ago

Oh lord ????, well let me know when you realize most women love sleeping with assholes in their 20’s

[-] SteroidsFreak 1 Point 2 months ago

Lol bruh I'm 27. The older you are the the more attracted young women will be towards you. Where have u been?

[-] [deleted] 2 months ago
[-] Synthetic_Citizen 2 Points 2 months ago

This has probably been mentioned to you already, but ill say it anyway for good measure. She has been planning her exit for weeks now and she has a conscious reason for it either another guy or the possibility of one. She has probably already been checking other guys out and flirting with other guys in person or on social media, either way, this was premeditated and consciously planned.

I garuntee you, she may be back in a few weeks or months claiming that she made the biggest mistake of her life, im sure you are clued up enough not to fall for that

All in all you have dodged a bullet many ignorant men take right between the eyes. This is a win in my book.

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

Yeah she even said she has been thinking about it. The longer she waits to beg to come back the less her chances of succeeding. If I don't get a text from her begging for another chance within a month, she will be forever dead to me.

[-] R3v4mp3d 2 Points 2 months ago

Don't rush things. Control your emotions and think with your mind. What if she needs 2 months? We've all read and lived through some bad breakups but this current breakup of yours is one of the most beautiful. Hey it's not a happy ending but if you apply moral filters and virtues to how she handled it, she is a true gentlewoman. Sometimes TRP is a little too grumpy over horrible past failures. ;)

[-] Pharmpharm7 2 Points 2 months ago

You're right. I'll see how things go. I think I did the right thing by blocking her on social media though. She needs to feel that she fucked up at least a little.

[-] R3v4mp3d 2 Points 2 months ago

True. Good point. Now you need to go monk mode for awhile (around a few weeks/ a month) and then you can be sociable again. Women aren't attracted to men that seem depressed for long periods after the breakup becuase they feel he was way more invested -> she is more valuable than you -> it's good that you're not together because she'll be "dating up" now (or so she thinks). BUT! that's the official theory. Given how honest and tactful she was, I'm not sure if you should immediately assume that all theories that work on most women will apply to her. You have an interesting situation friend. ^_^

[-] redpillschool 1 Point 2 months ago

She needs to feel that she fucked up at least a little.

Still not totally getting it- she needs nothing. It doesn't matter. She will never get justice or whatever you think you want. It's time to put it out of your head.

You don't care what she does from here on out.

She could fall off a cliff. Or she could marry the next guy she meets and live happily ever after.

Doesn't matter. You are now moving on. SHE ALREADY IS.

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

I mean I literally just got pied in the face yesterday out of nowhere. It's still processing. Deep down I just want to text her mom and let her know how her daughter fucked up. Her parents would probably agree she fucked up. It'd be nice to let them know what their daughter did.

[-] redpillschool 2 Points 2 months ago

I know. I know. You just want some level of justice, to feel like others agree with you. That she's making bad, irrational choices, and that you don't deserve this.

After something like this happens, you'll fucking take it from anybody willing to give it. Just a shred of human decency to tell you that you're right and she's wrong.

You need to let go of this. Scorched earth policy is the only way forward. Keeping this wound open will only take it longer to heal and trust me when I say this you won't get closure so it's time to stop thinking about it.

The best thing you can do is go fucking dark on her and her family and her friends. The closest you will ever get to closure is knowing that the less you have contact with her and her family, the more she'll realize how easily you're moving on.

That is the only justice you get. It's not sweet but keep that in your mind.

If she can still get you on the phone, or get you to respond to texts or her parents tell her you've been in contact with them, or you volunteer to bring her her keys- all you do is communicate that you're still there waiting for her.

Your continued involvement with her and her family will give her the confidence to fuck other men without worrying.

It sounds hard but it's time to delete your texts with her, delete her number, block her everywhere and remove her name from your vocabulary.

She is no longer a person to you.

This isn't your choice, she made it for you.

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

This makes a lot of sense. I want to keep my dignity. I won't be contacting anyone.

I'm sitting with family and friends now and I just have an uneasy feeling. Almost like a mild nausea/anxiety/butterflies. I don't know what it is but it feels like I'm always close to breaking down.

[-] redpillschool 2 Points 2 months ago

It will pass, brother.

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

I'm in fucking tears knowing what's about to happen. I just can't believe it. She'll never be the same person again. I really want to text her what the fuck happened.

I just want to text her:

"I'm really confused right now. I can't believe 4 years came down to this."

Because I am fucking confused

[-] R3v4mp3d 1 Point 2 months ago

Also, I feel that you're looking for solace. I would recommend sitting with yourself alone in a room and doing whatever you want. Try to avoid drinking (if possible). You will slowly deal with it. If you left an indelible mark on her heart, then you will not be easily forgotten. In all cases, wait now, you'll see later. It's NEVER a good idea to make plans when you're in emotional turmoil.

[-] Synthetic_Citizen 1 Point 2 months ago

No. NO NO NO. You will not wait another second for this thot. Understand that there is only one way to maintain your dignity, if she does contact you again you must demote her to plate and treat her as a dick sleeve.

personally i would not have put up with such distespect from a girl i offerr commintent to. Eternal hard next to me.

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

I'm sorry I can't do this. You guys don't fucking know what we have. I'm giving her a chance to cool down in a week and to get back. I let her know that the decision will be irreversible if she goes through with it.

[-] juanwonone1 2 Points 2 months ago

Dumbass bitch..... she'll regret it.

[-] Kyogata 2 Points 2 months ago

Wants to ride the carousel. She'll regret it as soon as she sees you with a hot babe smiling up at you.

[-] wisdom_is 2 Points 2 months ago

Never rely on a woman. NEVER! It hits you hard when you experience the things the RedPill is all about first hand. I dated a women 11 years older then I. You would think a 40+ woman would be mature. Nope, she was basically a woman with the emotional bandwidth of a teenager even tough she is intelligent. I came to a conclusion to never make a woman my prime goal. They are just there for the ride as long as the serve MY purpose. Not the other way around. Just focus on yourself. Never be surprised by a change of heart. Don't expect much from women, this way you will never be disappointed. Expect them to lie, manipulate or trade up. Its the way things go. Women are mostly about themselves. I suggest you join the team.

[-] BluBlac59 2 Points 2 months ago

Buy some investment properties and one that is profitable enough to live in for free. Never tell anyone that you own the building. Buy a nice car and a nice motorcycle join a gym. Bang good looking women. You're free.

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

Thanks for that

[-] RainbowSteiner 2 Points 2 months ago

Atleast she had the decency to break up with you before "finding herself". Ive seen it too many times where the girl starts "exploring" and having their boyfriend as the back up plan. Bullet dodged.

[-] Pharmpharm7 2 Points 2 months ago

Yeah I'm thankful for that

[-] quitpmogamesdrugs 2 Points 2 months ago

This probably doesn't mean much but I just wanted to say how proud I am of you for being able to achieve a 6 figure salary at the age of 24. I know money isn't everything but it's something to be proud of. I'm turning 29 soon and well...not going into detail but fucked up and have a long journey ahead of me to fix things. Keep your head up, the world is your oyster my friend!

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

It's not all roses. I have an insane amount of student loans. Thank you though and good luck

[-] UnbreakableButts 2 Points 2 months ago

Dude trust me, she made a fucking huge mistake and once she's done getting gang fucked by god knows how many dudes over the next few years she's going to hit that wall and immediately think of you and start regretting she didn't start that family with you.

[-] Pharmpharm7 2 Points 2 months ago

And now I made it very clear to her that her actions have consequences. She thought she could do whatever the fuck she wanted for years and still have me ready to go with open arms once she's had her fix of nearly infinite dick. She told me not to do anything rash and for us to cool down and talk again in a week.

[-] Varsel 2 Points 2 months ago

Don't be surprised if she recycles back in five or ten years.

[-] MattyAnon 2 Points 2 months ago

Regardless, despite my reading of the red pill, this experience has scared me a little bit. It's different when you're the one experiencing it. It scared me because it proves that no matter what I do and no matter how happy we are, she can just come up with something as simple as that and call it quits.

And this is why the whole monogamy deal is a shitty one, especially for men. We invest more and women branch swing easier than we do.

Building a future together makes her hypergamous brain feel that you are paying (which you are) and therefore you are following a beta mating strategy (which you are) and therefore you are beta (can't fault her for this conclusion really) therefore there are other men more attractive than you (which they are to her) and therefore why should she commit (her paying) to a man less attractive than she can find elsewhere?

In short: commitment kills attraction.

The trick is not to commit, not to invest and not to expect "a future together". It should always be "see how it goes", and you should always always have other options. Because you are exactly as attractive as your other options.

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

Yeah I genuinely fucked up bringing up the conversation. That's all it took, one conversation, one fuck up and it's 4 years down the drain. It's annoying because I have plenty of friends and family that are getting engaged at my age. I thought she would be happy when she finally got she wanted..

[-] MattyAnon 2 Points 2 months ago

it's 4 years down the drain

Every moment you spend with her is time and other resources down the drain.

You are not earning anything with a woman, you are not "building something together".

You're together for a while, then you break up.

Accept this, deal with it, live your life accordingly.

I thought she would be happy when she finally got she wanted

This is not how women operate. What they want and what they say they want are wildly different.

Stop investing in things owned by other people. Stop listening to women. Stop investing in relationships.

Live your own life, don't live through a relationship.

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

Well we could have built a family but not anymore. You're right, living through a relationship isn't really growing.

[-] dulkemaru51 2 Points 2 months ago

Whatever you do, do NOT take her back.

You'll be the beta she settled for, and that's not nice, even if she understands that you're the very best she can get (long term). If she's willing to let you go, at any time, to any degree, whether she returns at 29 or after a couple of weekends, she doesn't see you as the alpha she has to desperately cling to.

You'll get far better, she won't, and she'll learn it at some point, and you'll feel so so satisfied.

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

She still sees me as that alpha. She's just scared of wondering "what if" for the rest of her life. I threatened her that this would be an irreversible decision and that I would block her out of my life forever. We agreed we both should cool down. I know she doesn't want to lose me.

[-] SeasonedRP 2 Points 2 months ago

You've gotten good input. I note your hesitancy to block her and cut off communication. It's normal not to want to and to think you can show her what she missed out on if you keep some type of channels open. When making your decision on this, know one thing is a certainty: she has someone else. She doesn't just think she can do better and want to see what else is out there--she's lined someone up. You missed the signs, but she did cheat. There are some circumstances when a girl will just break up without another option, but this isn't one of them. For you own self respect, I wouldn't have any contact with her whatsoever or keep her on any social media. She'll hear about you through others if she wants to. But she won't. Once a girl breaks up with you, you don't exist to her anymore. She won't be back in six months. She isn't going to see what's out there, realize she made a mistake, and come back. No, she has someone else that in her mind is better for her. It may not make any sense objectively, e.g., the guy may be a loser, but logic isn't how women operate.

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

You're right, I'm probably dead to her.

[-] avtarius 2 Points 2 months ago

It's fine bruh, at least now you have first hand experience.

We all want to play by our own rules, defy stereotypes and norms, but in the end we can only change ourselves, not others.

TBFH now, you should tell her right now to not contact you ever, especially after she's wasted her years on FOMO.

[-] sorry_mommy 2 Points 2 months ago

So she was up at 4 am. There's one of two possibilities: 1. She was up crying about me. 2. She was getting fucked by a guy or several that she already had lined up.

Or she got up to take a piss and checked her phone. Believe me, buddy, she isn't thinking of you right now as much as you're thinking of her.

[-] Pharmpharm7 2 Points 2 months ago

I feel like I started to man up a little more today. Thanks for providing some common sense in this thread.

[-] sorry_mommy 2 Points 2 months ago

I feel ya dude. It's tough to go through every time, but try to treat this entire experience as an important lesson, and it will shape your life as a man in a positive way.

[-] Pharmpharm7 2 Points 2 months ago

It is a very important lesson and I'm determined to learn from it. This was a wake up call for me that I wasn't doing enough somehow.

[-] MentORPHEUS 2 Points 2 months ago

I'm in good shape and just landed a six figure job at the age of 24.

Congratulations. I have a dating tip: Portray yourself to women as a guy making low average money. Even consider maintaining a cheap second domicile to take women to. Coming out of a 4 year relationship, you may not be expecting the pack of wolves that is the dating market has become for your cohort.

[-] FeniZio94 2 Points 2 months ago

Hahahahaah nice one... well she’s about to plummet that market value straight below zero man...

[-] Pharmpharm7 5 Points 2 months ago

The grass isn't always greener. She's going to learn a few things about economics, especially about undervaluing an appreciating asset.

[-] archaic-guy 2 Points 2 months ago

Just an small advice don´t marry her becuase she considers you a second option when you are a succesful guy and can surely find another girl.Don´t let her return as nothing more than a fuckbuddy.

But if you got money and still want to marry other woman you must still secure your capital I would recomend you the next two things:

A) Put almost all that you have on a society under your complete control that way your patrimony becomes actions or participations

B) Make her agree to have separation of propierty in your marriage arrangement documents or don´t marry at all becuase if this is a problem she doesn´t love you to being with.

That way she can´t reclaim the partipations where all your money is becuase that is your PRIVATE propierty that exist outside of the economic-matrimonial regimen. This is what football players and rich people do.What did you seriusly belive that Powerful people would make the law to fuck themselves?

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

Fascinating. I'll look into it.

[-] TruthSeekingPerson 1 Point 2 months ago

Women don't love like we love. And once they've tried a few different cocks they can't pair bond either.

​

I'm really sorry this happened to you but it is probably better to learn first hand AWALT. It sounds like you always knew it might happen but were still blindsided by it.

​

An older guy once told me that with marriage you have to accept that at any time they can pack up and leave with the kids and you have to accept it. I don't understand how men accept that kind of deal but if you want a family you have to.

​

I hope all men start fighting back for 50% custody in the event of divorce so the pain of divorce is more evenly felt. Maybe women will realize destroying their family is going to hurt them just as much.

[-] magx01 1 Point 2 months ago

It scared me because it proves that no matter what I do and no matter how happy we are, she can just come up with something as simple as that and call it quits.

Humans, especially females, are not "built" to be monogamous. Trying to live that way leads at the very least to boredom and feeling as though one is "missing out" and at the worst outright resentment and cheating.

This will always happen until you stop trying to force a square peg into a round hole.

[-] [deleted] 2 months ago
[-] KewlThanks 1 Point 2 months ago

Someone at the bar gave me some amazing advice, he's gonna be a marine.

"bitches ain't shit"

lol so fucking true

[-] javiercer20 1 Point 2 months ago

It’s over now. What works for me is that I’ll be radical 1000% that way there’s no chance I must be missing something. It’s always the best insurance policy. That’s why LTR are at the top of the game on my point of view.

[-] wildtimes3 1 Point 2 months ago

Top comment already filled you in.

How long is your average sexy encounter? Curious.

She is a fucking nut bag. 20 years ago grandmothers and mothers impressed upon their daughters to pick well, not stay on the train. It’s rare to dodge a howitzer.

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

With her? We'd go for less than an hour because she'd get sore. She's always had the problem where her vagina hurts after 20-30 minutes of fucking at most, no matter how much foreplay and lube we had. I had one fwb that could go two hours plus of fucking, I'll probably reach out to her soon.

[-] [deleted] 2 months ago
[-] DoctorWaffleHouse 1 Point 2 months ago

Good for you my man, ready to be single and mingle.

​

[-] [deleted] 2 months ago
[-] aDrunkenWhaler 1 Point 2 months ago

There are only 3 possibilities for her bringing up the talk the way she did:

  1. She has a guy she wants to fuck and doesn't want to feel guilty for being a cheater.
  2. She fucked someone and wants to justify her actions by somehow shifting the blame on you (you're not the one, you don't make her feel special, etc.), so she doesn't feel like a bad person.
  3. She fucked someone and wants to keep fucking him without extra complications from you.

Either way, there was an event that triggered this, and it includes another guy. No turning back now. She is done. You dodged a bullet.

[-] krowitz 1 Point 2 months ago

There's a recent post about congruency here lately. You will do well to read it.

Just go on your merry way and make yourself your mental point of origin.

You won't find happiness spiting her. It is just another AWALT story anyway. It was fun while it lasted I'm sure, now on to the next one.

​

[-] [deleted] 2 months ago
[-] ZachMeadows 1 Point 2 months ago

Although what happened is sad, I'm wondering why you waited 4 years to introduce her to your family...

Oh well, focus on yourself from now on.

Peace.

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

Religious family wasn't ready for me to introduce her.

[-] javiercer20 1 Point 2 months ago

If she’s breaking up with you means there was some red flag you must’ve missed.

[-] Pharmpharm7 2 Points 2 months ago

I don't fucking know and it's killing me

[-] Pharmpharm7 1 Point 2 months ago

Literally last week she was down to move to Bumblefuck nowhere with me because of the job market and now this happens

[-] Zech4riah 1 Point 2 months ago

Yes, and no one here prepares you emotionally to things like this because TRPd men need to be stoic and manly! And here you see once again that monogamy doesn't work, they way to go is open relationships.

Anyway, blocking and deleting shit is useless imo unless you doubt that they will trigger you at some point to do something stupid (like contacting her).

Blocking and deleting things are for weak and butthurt beta males.

PS. Gz, you got pretty much her best years!

[-] [deleted] 2 months ago
[-] ozaku7 0 Points 2 months ago

I did the same with another girl. The relationship didn't mean much to me, I just felt so comfortable, but then my clock started ticking and it made me realise I'm wasting both our time.

You were not bad or anything, just boring. Do something about it.

[-] parasolus 0 Points 2 months ago

Not going to sit here and coddle you. If you know anything about this sub you know how to translate from woman to english, and her woman translates to "I want outside different dicks". Why have you not introduced her to your family after four years? the fact that you're laid up with her and she's about to break up with her speaks just as much to your faults as it does hers. You're fucking up on basic redpill rules, keep plates or female orbiters no matter what. You should be fucking your pain away in a new girl right now. This is sad. This is not even AWALT, this is basic RedPill knowledge. If you're sad that she broke up with you, you lost frame. The fact that you made this post framing her as wrong for breaking up with you makes me think you never had good frame in the first place.

That's the problem with this sub though. You think you know Redpill theory because you read topics like 'meta" and "theory" etc etc. When you don't even know the fundamental basics. Idk in my opinion this sub should be first and foremost a place where any unaware man can come and equip himself with the basics. And the sidebar is just too many articles that have too many words and give too many situations to explain the same basic concepts. Very useful if you know the concepts, but if you don't it's nearly impossible to learn them if you have to wade through so much information.