How have you improved this week? In what ways did you take steps to get closer to your goals? In which ways did you fail? In which ways did you succeed. This is the thread to keep you accountable. Post weekly. Stay the course. Every Friday.
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Shredderick420 6y ago
Positives:
Negatives:
crespo_modesto 6y ago
pros
steadily working out. Trying to get under 200ls. I was at 202 the other night. I'm 6' and I am dieting/doing 3 day sessions at the gym. 2-2.5 hrs per night(run, squat, mostly upper body work). What I look like so far except I'm bald right now as of last night, 1/8" is short.
trying to make eye contact with people(more so with women)
improving life(financial, fix immediate problems)
listening to books like "Ego is the enemy", "No More Mr Nice Guy", currently 12 rules
reading rational male
doing freelance work
will start "to go out" on my days off (at least one) sucks it's monday/tuesday. I want to write a meetup scraper to check distance/time.
cons
still feel like my approaches to women are bad (needy/clingy/oneitis/schrodingers rapist)
not secure financially
not secure emotionally
anxiety approach
general self doubt/I'm incompetent why am I still a failure sort of mentality
every hot girt I see, oneitis
lasted 4 days nofap, the urges started to feel strong, though the porn/event was weak ie. barely aroused/was not interested in it. But I find it is hard to focus/code with this urge
Note: I am doxxable, probably not good, I've shared some github repos in the past.
Edit: I don't know if food can make you happy. At the moment/my recent routine I have: can of tuna with mayo, yogurt cup, multivitamin and coffee for breakfast. Restaurant job is constant motion so I pretty much fast throughout the day. No soda(or 1 glass with ice a day), just water/tea. Been feeling pretty good at first. Then it goes downhill at the end of the night (can't escape poverty, forever alone.)
TheDarkRanger 6y ago
You look like Michael Pena a lot, very similar face.
But good job on the gym, keep it up. Re-evaluate your approach, take corrective action, meditate some more and continue to chip at it.
crespo_modesto 6y ago
He's got the humor
Yeah I gotta work on my life first I realize, my life sucks
Just lowballed myself on a talk with a recruiter
Recruiter:
"Is that 35/hr?"
Me:
Uhh no salary
haha shit...
Ahh well I did it, I am generally scared of phone interviews. I was almost not going to do it. This isn't a React Engineer position or something though, pretty basic stuff, damn I don't understand my own worth though/don't charge enough freelancing.
Oh well, I didn't leave it empty/not act upon it so that's something. Still the whole gotta leave current job, etc etc... get to the location (bus takes 2 hours 1 way) I realize the logistics are not in my favor but I'm down to grind it out for a month or two and get a car with increased pay.
I also shaved my head ahhh shit.
Also looks like I have another negative on me already "Oh you don't have a degree?" Shit... ahh. Time to go sleep and cry about it.
theromanshcheezit 6y ago
Positive:
Negative
[deleted]
ichivictus 6y ago
Got out of an LTR of 1.5 years 2 weeks ago. The first week I spent grieving but this last week I've been focussing on things I need to improve.
Started working out. Already seen some improvements after waking up my muscles. Last time I worked out was 4 years ago.
I need to be pickier and remember that emotional investment needs to be a choice, not an occurrence. I also shouldn't even consider a relationship with a girl who lacks many basic adult skills. This LTR was not worth the grief but at least I learned plenty of lessons.
IndividualSplit 6y ago
my biceps and lats hurt from compounds
wrote down all my short term goals on sunday, had them all completed by tuesday. felt great, those motivational speakers weren't lying about that
decided to make a habit of reading books instead of screens during my break time, finished up a nice book on Milosevic the other day
really trying to strike a balance between a lot of definite self improvement and spending so many hours that I start getting tried of my own bullshit, I've been there before with 14 hour days and it's not fun
onmyway3 6y ago
This is my first post, I'm 28 years old, I had one LTR of 3 years and slept with around 15 women, I'm trying to stop being Beta Billy when I feel strong attraction toward woman, I went through some bitter stages in swallowing this pill, started implementing the knowledge then was uncomfortable but successful and then I went back being Beta and realized it was even worse, so I understand that I have to change if I want my life to be as I want it to be.
Positive:
Negative:
I just want to say thank you all. You showed me the way, and I know it's the right way to go. I'm still swallowing the pill, it's not easy but I know that I have to.
Ballerxk 6y ago
Positive :
Negative
[deleted]
almightyme 6y ago
I posted here about a month ago about how devastated I was about some Tinder girl ignoring me after I felt such a good connection. Well, since then I have been reading a lot of red pill material and started practicing a lot more.
Positives:
Negatives
MarmorEtSculptura 6y ago
You should read up on dread game
amekooky 6y ago
improvements (last time i check in here was maybe 6 months ago)
lost about 40 lbs in a span of 3 months.. im really happy with how the results are turning out. i followed everyones advice and did nothing but heavy lifting about 4-5 times a week from june 2016 until december 2017. once i integrated diet (keto) my muscle mass is finally starting to expose. I am about 35 lbs away from my goal.
ShesLikeOMG 6y ago
overall week: 7.5/10
Social 8/10
education 8/10
fitness 6/10
misc 8/10
Shaney96 6y ago
Neutral/Reflection:
I have this idea that, after I finish my placement, going be to Uni will be 'Valhalla'. I should readjust this expectation, as I could be setting myself up for disappointment. I feel I'm kinda 'coping'/stagnating at the moment due to how my family's a mess, am pretty much friendless and on an internship I don't really enjoy. I want to shift my perspective to see the good in every day, and I think I could do. My problem is my lack of direction - I'm not sure where I'm heading or what I'm able to achieve up until Uni. It sounds crazy, but I feel the only area I REALLY want/need to improve to feel some fulfilment and satisfaction in life is with women, and everything else is just a distraction, even if I am hitting the gym hard, reading non-fiction, making money and travelling...
My mind's been fucking me around more than usual this week. I journal, meditate, and am currently going through The Daily Stoic and accompanying journal, yet still I have days where I'm a fucking mess in the evenings. I'm at the lowest I've been in years. What gets me down even further is that, due to my belief/philosophy, I think "perspective is everything. You could be living a joyful life if you just changed your perspective on things." I do believe that I could be enjoying life although I don't even see attractive girls, don't have any friends, work in a very introverted environment where nobody socializes outside of work and live with people who literally only complain to me about their problems. I have this belief that "with the right mindset, living in a prison cell, being beaten every day, can still be a joyful life." I believe this is a naive perspective as it results in me beating myself up for even having 'down days'. I tell myself I shouldn't be feeling anxious or lonely this just shows I have the wrong mindset, then I feel even worse because I'm unable to just shift my mindset.
In the evenings I get this ball of anxiety I can feel in my stomach. I'm almost sure the cause of this is that I want to be talking to girls, I want to be seeing tangible results with women and going out and doing stuff with the friends I don't have, yet I almost feel I 'can't'. This is shit as it's every fucking night, and I end up distracting myself from it by browsing the internet or watching Netflix, sometimes binging. I don't have the bollocks to go out solo every week to the local club in my grotty little town. I'm heading to a city tomorrow alone, and hope I can just cold approach a few girls to prove to myself that I do have the potential.
Positive:
Started 5/3/1 BBB. Finding I'm enjoying my time in the gym more.
Bought and sold some more shit. Formalized this process to make it more business-like and am able to track monthly profit/loss.
Booked all accommodation for my Easter trip.
Spoke to my manager about changing my job role. Result was that he said he'd write a good reference and get me doing more dev stuff in forthcoming weeks.
Negative:
Broke NoFap streak. Back at 4 days atm.
Watched porn during streak-break.
Binged Sunday and last night.
Only practised guitar once this week.
Takeaways:
I must start going away at weekends. Like, just take day trips. Fortunately, I'm doing this tomorrow, am going away for a week next Friday, and are doing 2 day trips the proceeding weekends. I say "must" because it gives me the opportunity to actually cold approach, see new places and get out of my comfort zone. My usual excuse is "I have too much to do/my weekends are too precious", but this is bullshit and only applies when I go out drinking as doing so basically consumes the weekend due to recovery and travelling home on the Sunday.
Start researching into growing my Instagram.
steinboi 6y ago
Can you share any resources for this, especially for SMV-boosting purposes etc.
I did BJJ for some years and would do the same if there was a good gym close to me, you should definitely take up BJJ or MMA again. In my experiences and I have tried 4 gyms around Europe, you always form strong friendships with the people and get invited into cool activities if you hang around long enough, even better if you are the instigator.
Sidenote: I am trying out boxing now, and although I am not sparring, I felt like BJJ was way more intense than the current training I am doing. But I am only starting and I think when I get really going with boxing it will feel similar ("volume of life is turned down").
Shaney96 6y ago
I'm currently just looking at a few generic "boost IG followers" YouTube videos. The aim isn't to utilize IG to boost SMV (although this will most likely be an indirect result), but to instead be an outlet for one of my passions and also as a means to help break into an industry I'm interested in.
I will head back into BJJ. I aim to spend a few weeks, up to to months, organising and getting my shit together then will go back into it. I currently have a skewed perspective toward things that sucks the joy out of my activities and means I only see stuff as a means to an end sometimes.
Vinterson 6y ago
why aren't you able to practice bjj while having no problem lifting j? wouldn't it be exactly the thing to get you out of your head ? what stops you from socializing currently?
you seem very reflected but overanalyzing your problems to a point where they seem insurmountable( until you are at university.)
mental state and physical expression are a two-way street. you seem to think you need to fix it before you can practice bjj for example where very likely just doing it will work towards fixing your frame.
Shaney96 6y ago
I believe what put me off BJJ was that I was the least-experienced one there and didn't feel I was learning anything since all the moves being taught were very complex and didn't include any submissions. Thus, when we rolled, all I was doing was 'resisting' and using my strength to not get isntantly submitted. Of course, it takes time and discipline to learn such moves.
I did feel good while at BJJ and got on with everyone, and always felt better after going. I think being in such a calorie deficit at the time and doing BJJ on top of everything else was what was making me feel so drained. I'm bulking now so am reconsidering joining back soon, considering I sort my head out.
What stops me from currently socializing is that I don't know who to socialize with. I've been out alone numerous times and have run into, let's say "interesting" people.i cultivated some 'friends', but have given up on them as they never invited me to do anything and I was always the one trying to arrange things. I've got multiple examples where they've read my message and never replied or message me on the night saying they can't make it.
judethedude 6y ago
Consider indoor rock climbing, we have a bro group that goes 3 times a week now and it’s great; you get the benefit of climbing (fun, fitness) with socializing (rest time between runs). Even just bouldering some routes is great and it’s easy to bond with whoever’s there over the common experience.
Shaney96 6y ago
I actually forgot about this, so thanks for the reminder. There's a leisure centre close-by, but all classes require membership (cannot afford this), but I believe you can do the rock-climbing separately.
judethedude 6y ago
You’re right it’s not the cheapest but I feel the value is worth it if you can make it work!
Angu_jungle_poo 6y ago
Start peddaling some g round the block. Never fails me in a new city + meet loads of hot chicks
Shaney96 6y ago
Mind explaining "peddaling some g"? As in dealing weed?
Angu_jungle_poo 6y ago
Hehe, I was joking, well not really, but don't try this... or do - completely up to you.
All I'll say is if you really want to meet people it's not hard and though many on this forum think that spilling your problems will help, a better solution is go out and make a real effort. Peace bro and relax, lives a rollercoaster or something like that.
Shaney96 6y ago
I agree for sure regarding winging online vs actually taking action. I do try and make the most of my weekends and have used all my holiday time for travelling.
I feel I ramble online as an extension of my journalling, and I also believe it's because I sub-consciously desire engaging in dialogue with others due to being quite isolated at the moment.
420KUSHBUSH 6y ago
Positives:
-Been getting back into working out, set a personal best on doing skips with a jump row in a row (previous record 88, current is 208)
-School seems to be going well
-Socializing is increasing, feel more charming
Bad:
-Locked eyes with this girl and we got lost in each other's eyes and I forgot to approach. Even while I was walking down the stares she was looking at me so frustrated about that. A 9 in my standards and I have very high standards so I used the frustration to get a good workout in
-Haven't been meditating concurrently
[deleted] 6y ago
Positive
Negative
If I don't ,even temporarily, fix this shit, I'll irreversibly fuck up my relationships (as I have before) which'll means I'll miss out of enormous amount of opportunities .I'm in middle of this process already.
[deleted]
MarmorEtSculptura 6y ago
What speaking exercises do you do?
[deleted] 6y ago
Well my specific speech issues are 1)speaking to fast 2)lack of clarity due to lisp, so I 5 min everyday force myself to quickly ,clearly enunciating everything, make a short speech.
For me it's quite unpleasant, so to keep tempo I usually twist my arm until pain forces me to speak quickly .
it's quite amazing how doing this for just 1 month can impact your default speech. I used to speak so quickl people had no fucking diea what I said, but now I speak super slow, confidently and I come off as a boss. Long way to go still, but good shit.
darchetype 6y ago
Good:
Bad:
FirstNamesMusic 6y ago
This has been a good week:
Upped intermittent fasts to with 2 24 hour water fasts this week.
I am 10lbs from my goal weight. Was 240 this time last year, now 195.
Benched 300 lbs this week. This was one of my first fitness goals.
About to promote a girl to plate status once she gets back from vacation.
Next week I will work on some more.
Forcing myself to be social with almost everyone.
Joined a classical choir to force me to push myself musically. We have a performance sunday night.
Practicing stoicism.
Significantly decreased the amount of jacking off.
Now for the bad.
Didn't drink for a week, then this week fell back into old habits.
crespo_modesto 6y ago
Damn 300lbs shit that's a lot my max (5 reps) by myself is 150 I couldn't imagine that haha. I'm looking to get more cut than bulk though perhaps different goals.
Nofap_Dutch 6y ago
Positive:
-This week I worked out on a 2 day 1 day rest schedule, I now run more than I usually do and I have seen a tremendous change in my endurance.
-I got some amazing grades for subjects that are presented in the most boring way ever (languages, mathemathics, religious studies) and boosted my grades. (from a 6 to a 7 on average, some even got boosted to an 8).
-I never broke my eating plan, The temptation of junkfood kicked in hard but I didn't give in.
-Boosted the weight I lift.
-Attendance at my martial arts training (kenpo, once a week + at home solo training. Might go back to twice a week when I have time).
-I saved a friend from a toxic relationship. He finally broke up with a girl that was faking depression/being suicidal to always shame him, use guilt to waste his time being an emotional tampon. Even worse it was a long distance relationship so he never got anything in return.
-I work at McDonalds and can't do much work considering my young age, but I found some better place to work which pays 2 euro's an hour extra (which to me is +40/60 Euro's a month) and doesn't have disgusting smell, garbage and entitled landwhales for customers. When I can apply (not yet because of the minimal age) I will send my resumé and get that job. (my options are a nice clothing store, so not primark, or to work at an electronics store downtown)
-Cut loose some toxic influences in my life (some female feminist 'friends' who just use me, influence and try to turn me into a pussyhat wearing soyboy
-Got some better, more masculine clothes (I used to be BP, feminist so I have crappy printed hoodies) My old crappy clothes are now replaced with some better, fitted clothes. I might donate my old hoodies to a charity nearby that redistributes it to the poor or sell them, either way I am getting rid of them.
Negative:
-A girl I don't like (rejected her) who can't handle rejection is now trying to ruin my (social) life by always being there, talking shit about me to my close friends and making up all kinds of things about me even though I rejected her in the best way possible (as said to me by people who were there, male and female friends).
-Shoulder injury from a bad fall at my martial arts dojo, might need a week or so to recover so arm training will be lighter or even not there for a small while
Drakonlord 6y ago
40 matches on tinder. Enough to set up dates for next week. Did some form of training 6x this week. Looking to hit my cut goal in another month. Got promoted to senior lead at work.
Need to continue working on fitness, grinding tinder numbers, moving into the city next month, have to get an abn. Mainly getting laid off tinder sometime in April is my main goal.
Tlerhoh 6y ago
any tips for tinder? i always feel like i'm falling short. maybe it's because the girls are of a younger variety and I live in a big city where everyones busy?
Drakonlord 6y ago
Boost sunday night 8pm - 9pm.
Get good pics, with a DSL camera.
GorgeousGamer99 6y ago
Recent convert, only started reading TRP a week ago when I was trying to figure out how to deal with a case of oneitis. Made me realise how beta I was brought up to be, and so beginneth the journey.
Positive
Neutral/negative
[deleted]
Abeham10 6y ago
Thanks man!
steinboi 6y ago
Positives:
Negatives:
Abeham10 6y ago
Positive:
Broke up with my oneitis LTR of 7 months. Entered as BP. Realized I entered in her frame and why our relationship was dying. I’m happy I ended things. Blocked her and deleted all pics. Studying a lot (graduate student).
Negatives: I miss her from time to time. Only lifted once this week due to work and school. Confidence hasn’t been as high after break up.
To do: lift. Socialize. Study. Internalize TRP. Forget about her.
[deleted] 6y ago
Hey man, care only about the things ypu can directly control. You can't control that your brain misses her or that break up lowered your brain's natural automatic confidence level.
That's not within your control. You might as well be sad that it rainded today.
Instead focus on what you can control - shutting those BS ''I miss her'' thoughts down when you notice them and doing things that increase your confidence - working hard at school and gym, sticking to diet, going out and approaching.
That's what matters. Everything is else is irrelevant.
[deleted]
mental_models 6y ago
pros: faced some horrible shit, and held frame and stayed positive, patient and proactive.
cons: none
nebder 6y ago
Not quite FR worthy yet noteworthy to me. Set a new record on timeframe for married woman from hello to shoving my cock down her throat. Right at the 2 hour mark. Took an open seat next to a gal at the local brewery with zero intentions to game her. 2 hours later I’m facefucking her.
My automatic game and frame have greatly improved over these last 15 months. She was turning and bumped me (female opener), gave her some playful shit for it and then I’m in like flynn. Isolated to smoke a bowl and the rest is history. Standard tactics are always effective: cocky/funny, playfulness, teasing, compliance tests. She bought two rounds for me.
I’m an attractive man in my late 30s. About a year of lifting so I’m muscular enough to show it in clothes. About 10lbs overweight still with a bit of spare tire on the hips. She is mid 30s post wall bored married woman, about 20lbs chunky. Solid average woman.
Even talked about her husband and how nice he is to her. She loves and cares for him, just doesn’t want to fuck him the same way she wanted me to fuck her. The world is your playtoy when you get your shit together and “you get it”.
This kind of thing would not never crossed my mind as a possibility in life when I was deepest in my bloop ways. The extent of the changes in my life amaze me when I stop and think about it. I’ve had plenty of fuckups, backslides and challenges. Gotta keep moving forward.
mental_models 6y ago
it may be cringe-worthy now, but if you keep working hard things will get better.
lovs2spuge 6y ago
4th week in.
Good:
Went out for St. Patty's day and did a pretty good job of approaching and gaming women. I got entirely too drunk, but by the end of the night I talked/gamed/danced with about 5 different chicks. got a couple makeouts and numbers but no f-close - gotta crawl before you can walk I guess.
one of the chicks I gamed up is a friend of one of my previous plates. she didn't seem to mind this too much, though because we danced and made out. maybe I should try this more often
productivity at work has been better.
seeing good progress in the gym after 1 month of lifting. my weight has stayed relatively the same, but im definitely stronger and a tad bulkier. maybe this is recomping?
Bad:
Broke NoFap streak, but it seems much more controlled. I don't see an issue with this so long as I limit it to once a week.
don't get so drunk when trying to f-close
MarmorEtSculptura 6y ago
Seeing as how trp and game are different, how did you go about learning game?
lovs2spuge 6y ago
To be honest, I never really lacked at approaching or gaming. Before I discovered TRP I had success going up to chicks and hitting it off. But the ensuing time after was always my downfall. I would text them for days after I met them and always convinced myself that "this was the one"..and id be wrong every time and scare them off.
As for game itself, I just keep the conversation as light as possible, make fun of something she's wearing, initiate gentle touching, and then try and move it to the dance floor.
I always had the tools, just never knew I was using them or discovered better uses for them till I discovered TRP.
[deleted]
[deleted]