Long story short: Friend invited me for some drinks to celebrate his best friend's, a HB8, birthday last night. At the end, I end up fucking her brains out while making her orgasm on my friend's truck. Now she just texted me this out of the blue:
"Hey it's ** from last night and I was blacked out af have no recollection of what happened and just wanna know if we just fooled around or actually had sex last night just wanna make sure"
How do I respond to this guys?
[deleted] 5y ago
What happened? What did she say?
DaftOdyssey 5y ago
Well this turnout with the best outcome.
So I never ended up texting her anything to avoid her, and then a week after the situation, I was at club with guys and just having a good time with girls and all. Well one of the guys is a mutual friend between me and her, and out of the blue he comes to me, while I'm talking to this chick, "someone wants to talk to you." I was pretty curious who so I followed him, and it was the same damn chick. I almost wanted to run, I kept my cool and she walked towards me and she just started to talk about the damn night she "couldn't remember".
Anyways long story short, I started dancing with her and having a good time. At the end of the night we ended up at our mutual friend's house and we just fucked.
Ever since then, she became my weekend plate.
Let me tell you bro, I'm fucking glad this chick didn't push this shit with the cops. And as a bonus, she became another plate.
Honestly, this whole thing is a big lesson I needed to learn so I won't fuck it up later on.
[deleted] 5y ago
Good shit
juliusstreicher 6y ago
That "just wanna make sure" surely sounds like a setup to me. The bad kind of setup.
babybopp 6y ago
Don't admit to it. It is a setup. Getting you to admit to sleeping with her while she was drunk as in her words af. Just be like... nope we didn't, what you take me for!?
wadsworthsucks 6y ago
that wouldn't work if there were people who knew, though. better to plead the 5th.
phenixgold 6y ago
You dont!
PhaedrusHunt 6y ago
We held hands and though pure thoughts.
ElOweTea 6y ago
Say you blacked out too and don't remember anything either
juliusstreicher 6y ago
"I don't remember...ergo, I'll have to take the plaintiff's word for it. So will you, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, because I can't deny it!"
econquest 6y ago
man kids these days. take the following with a huge grain of salt. I'm just a TRP beginner.
I miss tinder. if I got a text like this after hooking up with a tinder date for the purposes of having sex, I could think of a couple of legitimate reasons why she would want to know, for example if she wants to know whether to get tested for STD's, or if she needs to take some birth control pill or check for pregnancy over the coming weeks. (She does say "if we fooled around", which unless it's a trick takes responsibility for what "we" (plural) did.)
Now I am too new to Red Pill to offer a way to do this but what do other people here think about my following suggested reply:
but hey that's just me. Ideally get a text back from her 1) taking responsibility and 2) saying it was a good experience.
Notice that my suggested text does not answer her question directly. don't do that.
it's comfort game time. (in my opinion.)
MattyAnon Admin 6y ago
DO NOT RESPOND
If you say you had sex, you have just legally confessed to rape.
alclarkey 6y ago
If he hasn't already by making this post.
YouLoveThisBTW 6y ago
“I blacked out too. Don’t remember a thing. Let’s meet up and see if we can jog eachothers memories.”
stylesm11 6y ago
Tread carefully, maybe say you had blacked out too
bitterconsultant 6y ago
say "lulz I was totally blacked out too, must have been a great night!! let me buy you dinner so we can get to know each other"
This way you switch it to a fun vibe asap and either:
WithItOrOnIt 6y ago
Just tell her you were as drunk as her and you don't remember shit neither
bitchpotatobunny 6y ago
Whatever you do, don't reply with any answer, especially via text. You really should ignore and hard next her.
However, if you're going to ignore that advice and respond at all, CALL HER (don't text) and say something along the lines of "Let's grab coffee." If she does agree to meet for coffee, then when you meet you can verbally say something along the lines of "I'm also having trouble remembering last night. Let's try retrace our steps. What do you remember?" This leaves her with her plausible deniability, and still doesn't incriminate you. From there you can have a friendly conversation, build some rapport, finish your coffee, and with her and gracefully bow out. It'll leave her feeling less like a slut and less likely to make any false claims. At no time whatsoever do you admit to remembering.
All that being said, really refer back to the first two sentences. You should ignore that shit and hard next.
juliusstreicher 6y ago
No, she has a call recorder on her phone. And, she'll be recording your in person conversation, regardless of your thinking that your penis was so wonderful that she wouldn't think of such a thing.
bitchpotatobunny 6y ago
VasiliyZaitzev 6y ago
"If we had had sex, I'm sure it would have been memorable."
DaftOdyssey 6y ago
Damn, this is gold! Nice one Vasiliy
mrpthrowa 6y ago
hey dude before doing anything hasty and snappy that looks good on asktrp, consult a lawyer.
Pynewacket 6y ago
a MALE lawyer
SuperCrazy07 6y ago
That's a great one liner, but man do I not think you should be making jokes when she's contemplating a date rape charge.
Questionnaire7 6y ago
Its not a joke. It doesnt answer her question at all while at the same time isnt ignoring it.
wadsworthsucks 6y ago
Anything you say can and will be used against you. Especially when you can't delete it.
Questionnaire7 6y ago
How can that be used against him?
wadsworthsucks 6y ago
a cop or a DA can turn ANYTHING against you. besides, OP said that people already know. andf is those people get subpoenaed and their testimony contradicts OP's, he comes out as a liar. the only thing that can't be used against him is pleading the 5th. OP going all cocky and jokey isn't going to help him.
edited to add: how do we know this isn't her BFF texting OP and/or coaching the girl on what to say to build a rape case? It happens, man.
chasebandz01 6y ago
the absolute state of western women. give this a shot pal. "wow i don't even know, maybe we should get together and try to fill in eachother's blanks :^)"
don't say anything over text besides that. if she doesn't go for it ignore it and start lawyer shopping. its best to be prepared.
XCKCX 6y ago
Don’t respond at all, it’s an ASD shit test. If you really want to fuck with her, say “Nothing, just kissed.” Then she’ll know you’re lying but won’t be able to say so without exposing her own lie.
[deleted] 6y ago
Yup, this is the best course of action you could take that or just block her.
DaftOdyssey 6y ago
Yeah I'm pretty sure it's ASD since she asked me how long have I been friends with my buddy, which is a couple of weeks, and she responded with "Oh no, that looks bad on me lol" after we fucked
XCKCX 6y ago
And with that, my “probably” just got upgraded to a “definitely”. You fucked this bitch literally, time to fuck her figuratively. Hard next.
DaftOdyssey 6y ago
I'll just reply with "If I had fucked you, it would have been memorable." From a comment from this thread
juliusstreicher 6y ago
Good idea!
If you drop the soap in the communal showers, do NOT bend over.
nofilmynofucky 6y ago
You're playing with fire if you do.
Admit it, the only reason you're not ghosting this girl is cos you want to bang her again. Honestly it sounds like your thirst is going to wind up fucking uou over
This is why abundance mentality is so important. A man with options would not even be considering responding
DaftOdyssey 6y ago
Yeah I understand. I currently have two plates, but I know my abundance mentality is not the at the most ideal right now. I'll proceed by ignoring her. Thanks for the reality check btw. Needed that.
nofilmynofucky 6y ago
Honestly I'd say that's the sensible option. I was quite surprised to see old Vas recommending such a flippant and casual response but I think he's relatively old school and a lot of his advice doesn't seem to take into account how dangerous the modern sexual atmosphere can be for men
wadsworthsucks 6y ago
the 3 rules for talking to the police also apply in this situation:
Shut up
And when done with the first 2:
Saying ANYTHING can incriminate you. If you say nothing, they have nothing. For all we know, she's planning to show the text conversation to the cops. PLEAD THE 5TH!
Girls who have sex when drunk and/or high are nothing but trouble. happened to me twice. the first one told the cops, because she was ashamed of what her religious parents would say. the second was sleeping with me and another guy, and used rape as an excuse to keep the other guy around. I speak from experience, kid.
DaftOdyssey 6y ago
What should I do in the situation I walk into her?
juliusstreicher 6y ago
Say, "No." How hard is that?
wadsworthsucks 6y ago
Well, if you can, avoid any places she might be. and i highly recommend talking to a lawyer TODAY. consultations are free. and the BAR can also refer you to a good attorney. You can't be too prepared, kid. And, not that it'll likely get to this point, but if asked to take a lie detector, REFUSE. I almost agreed to one for religious girl, but I was friends with a cop at the time, and he advised me that it doesn't help me, and can't be used in court, so it's a waste of time. Your lawyer can speak on your behalf.
The second girl was wasted when we spent the night together. I even told her I loved her and wanted to marry her that night. she said if i got a ring, she would probably say yes. the next day, I send her pics of the platinum engagement ring I bought, and she texts me back saying I raped her that night before. I calmed her down and we met up when I got off work. I proposed, and she said yes, with tears in her eyes. 1.5 days later my friend showed me texts from her phone professing her love to the other guy 10 mins after I left from proposing to her. my friend confronted her and asked her why, if i raped her, would she spend the next day with me at the park, and say yes to my proposal. She was speechless, what with logic being an alien concept to females.
Remember, it makes no difference that you were drunk/high, too, because "only women can be raped". . . A lawyer can definitely advise you better than I can, But my personal, non-legal advise is to avoid her at all costs. Do not speak to her, and do not speak to anyone she knows about that night. if it comes up, change the subject, and suddenly remember that you have to be elsewhere. In fact, don;t talk to any of your friends about it until you talk to a lawyer. remember: "shut up".
Pluglord 6y ago
Why the fuck would you propose to a psycho who was JUST about to falsely accuse you of rape?
wadsworthsucks 6y ago
stupidity. I was blinded. I know that, now. I've wised up. When I met her, 4 years earlier, she wasn't anything like that.
the_real_lunch_box 6y ago
oh fuck. she can make this really bad for you. I would suggest you explain everything to her as it really happened. were there friends that saw that she was interested in you? Also, did you use a rubber?
ShotgunTRP 6y ago
Jesus Christ your advice is piss poor. Stop writing here and only read for fucks sake.
the_real_lunch_box 6y ago
Thanx buddy. But no
Fulp_Piction 6y ago
What difference would it make if you actually had sex? How can she remember that you 'fooled around' but 'blacked out'?
WoodWizzy87 6y ago
metoo movement. I don’t care how drunk a girl is you know exactly what’s happening. I’ve been hammered like a mother fucker and can retrace my steps to everything I did the whole night.
The whole drunk bullshit is just plausible deniability. Did we, didn’t we I can’t remember. Total bait question over text man. Don’t reply
ddbsirt 6y ago
Well, this is just inaccurate. Im 90kg 5'9 lean and I've got so drunk I've woken up not remembering sex with my LTR before.
Droogas 6y ago
I too have never understood this. I've gotten very close to alcohol poisoning but have never just 'forgotten' significant parts of a night. Maybe a conversation but never something more than that.
Mr-Ed209 6y ago
What a dick move on her part.
Do not respond by text, don't put anything out there in writing. Maybe she has a BF and is trying to mentally let herself off the hook. Maybe she's into you and, badly, trying to gauge wether you're interested in seeing her again.
I'd either not respond entirely or call her and deal with it like the shit test that it is. But whatever you do, do not reply by text and give her any leverage to turn this around on you. She might not cry rape to the police, but she might show her brothers or white knight orbiters and try and stir some drama while dragging your reputation through the mud.
bobtheseal 6y ago
I blacked out too .. sorry I don't know..
Pluglord 6y ago
Bro. You might be FUCKED.
[deleted] 6y ago
Two words: plausible deniability.
If I can't remember what happened that means I wasn't a slut, right?
DaftOdyssey 6y ago
Oh she definitely showed some ASD signals last night after fucking
juliusstreicher 6y ago
You just can't stop from going on about it, can you???
There is your answer. Regret sex=Rape charge. Do you still want to send her a fucking witty answer?
DaftOdyssey 6y ago
Well I haven't sent anything, but she asked me if I'm free Friday night to chill at her place. I don't think I'm going
juliusstreicher 6y ago
Man, that's gotta hurt! A hot fuck, and an invitation to come over, and you're passing on it!
Best move, really. There's no telling if she has her bf and 5 or 6 of his White Knight friends, or if she's there with champagne and another female friend!
Good luck!
DaftOdyssey 6y ago
Yeah, it's alright. Old me would definitely go blindly, but now I know no girl is worth enough for my life to be at risk. And btw, I'm going to be busy this weekend with two meet ups, so I'm good bro! Thanks for the help btw
WithItOrOnIt 6y ago
Such as ?
htbf 6y ago
"shit I was gonna ask you the same thing but I didn't have your number."
alpha-zach 6y ago
This sounds dangerous to me. She obviously knows what happened. “I blacked out” is complete bs.
If her position is she blacked out and you say you screwed, rape nearly guaranteed. Even if she isn’t thinking it now, when her mind starts hamstering or has buyers remorse or her girl friends talk to her it’ll become rape in her mind no matter what the truth is. THEY DONT CARE ABOUT THE TRUTH THEY CARE ABOUT THEIR REPUTATION.
At the least it’s ASD, at the worst metoo incrimination. Women are incredibly gifted at this stuff. You CANT let your guard down and always retain plausible deniability.
I wouldn’t respond by text at all. It’s a written record very hard to undo legally. If you decide to answer at all, it needs to be verbal so if she comes at you with something you can deny you ever said it.
If you have access to someone who can give legal advice, check with them.
If you used a condom, you might want to consider saying in person, “no nothing happened.” If she’s on ASD, she has her plausible deniability, problem solved. If she’s checking to see if you’ll keep it quiet, problem solved. If she has a boyfriend, problem solved.
If you didn’t use a condom, start praying.
Sounds to me like you put your dick in crazy. I’d stay away in the future.
Morphs_ 6y ago
I thought so too, until I met my ex last year. She was able to have complete black outs while drunk. Happened when I was at a party with her. She started acting extremely weird and withdrawn, I got pissed and took her home.
Next morning I was still pissed and she woke up completely happy because she never recalled the drama part.
So yes it's possible and seriously fucked up.
alpha-zach 6y ago
Maybe, but have you considered that’s her game? She rationalizes that she can be crazy and use the black out excuse. I’ve seen it done with style. It’s bpd at the least though.
Morphs_ 6y ago
Yes I did think of that. She was with me the whole time so there wasn't any reason for her to cover things up. She just got weird from alcohol.
But to be honest, yes she had load of psychological issues, including signs of BPD.
On another instance she had some bruises afterwards when she had been out with a friend. She couldn't remember a thing, she thought she walked into a signpost or something... brushed it off as it wasn't a big deal. For all I knew she could have fucked a whole footballteam and "not remember anything". And this was while she was on vacation, to one of those party fuckfest locations (she had it booked before I knew her).
I'm glad to be single now, never a bpd again for me, those women will fuck you up hard.
alpha-zach 6y ago
Amen to that brother
DaftOdyssey 6y ago
Thanks for the advice! And I'll put money that it is ASD http://reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/8ckb7t/how_do_i_respond_to_girl_who_forgot_we_had_sex/dxfn019
But I'll still play it safe by not responding in text.
alpha-zach 6y ago
If you used a condom, I kind of like xckcx’s response. You trap her into exposing her own lie. That’s brilliant. Documenting that you said nothing happened in text might not be bad.
If you didn’t use a condom and she turns out pregnant and you lied by saying nothing you might have a different problem. But it’s a much better problem than rape charge.
DaftOdyssey 6y ago
Yeah I mistakenly didn't use a condom, and that's my part of fault, but I didn't ejaculate. Don't know if I can still use xckcx's response.
magical_artist 6y ago
You could always claim you weren't sobber either. Didn't remember the sex incase impregnation is on the table.
Thethrowawayoption 6y ago
Depending on your specific physiology, not ejaculating might mean there's no recoverable evidence. Some guys have sperm-containing pre-cum that comes out before orgasm during sex, while others don't let anything out until orgasm.
alpha-zach 6y ago
If I had more energy, I’d rip you a new one for your own good.
I know who you are and where you’re at. I’ve been there. This was not a mistake this was Russian roulette. There’s likely no way you’ll learn until it nearly destroys you. I’m sorry. I feel for future you who goes through intense difficulty when your “mistakes” catch up with you. You’ll want to end your life. Don’t. Just keep moving forward day by day and it’ll work itself out. If you were my friend, would beat you unconscious for your stupidity.
DaftOdyssey 6y ago
Yeah I deserve that
613WeTheGreatest 6y ago
Not OP but needed this, saved and will be read again and again
Right now I can easily profess that "having sex with a girl you just met without a condom is retarded and stupid as fuck" but in the moment I thrill seek to the max and will decide to not put one on, thank you mate
DaftOdyssey 6y ago
Yeah that is exactly what I experienced. In the heat of the moment, especially when toxicated, my mind doesn't process consequences thoroughly. And then continue to live with those consequences.
[deleted] 6y ago
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[deleted] 6y ago
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iknowthewhey 6y ago
Not something to take lightly. Do you know if she has a boyfriend? How long have you known this girl for? Does anyone else know this happened? If she is worried about her reputation then her text might be her way of getting you to incriminate yourself.
She could potentially be trying to set you up for a false rape. Most likely not but be cautious. I would recommend ignoring the text. If she brings it up just pretend you never saw it.
juliusstreicher 6y ago
This here. Her bf could be pissed at her and she lied and said nothing happened, but, he made her text this to 'get the truth'. Then, he'd come to kill you. Or, force her to file a rape charge. etc... If a chick says she doesn't remember if you fucked, 100% of the time there is a reason for it, which does not bode well for the askee.
EDIT: Further, if anybody, ANYBODY, your besties, homeboys, bros, niggas, etc...ask you about it, DO NOT give them a straight answer. They are recording your answer, so that they can be the White Knights who come to her rescue when your trial for rape comes up. Believe me, do not answer. Just ask them WTF they are talking about. Who told them. Why they think you fucked. etc...
iknowthewhey 6y ago
Damn if you have friends like that they need to be dropped immediately. It's a rough world out there and it only gets worse calling people like that hour friend.
juliusstreicher 6y ago
This is the dangerous state when White Knights are allowed their freedom. But, what can you expect? If you get an HB8, as the OP banged, and she says she was drunk, and, 'btw, I didn't fuck OP, did I? My little heart would just be broken!' you can definitely expect WKs to jump to do her bidding.
DaftOdyssey 6y ago
Last night was the first time I met her, and everyone in the group knew what was happening, that we fucked, since they were making jokes about it after the fact.
Honestly I would rather tell her what happened in person, but I'll probably just ignore the text.
nofilmynofucky 6y ago
That's your 'best intentions' instinct: you need to ignore the fuck out of it and proceed with extreme caution
She knows what happened - you say yourself, everyone knows what happened, so she's trying to shift the 'blame' to you somehow. Maybe she has a boyfriend, maybe she's just ashamed that her friends know what a slut she is now, or maybe those friends have been buzzing in her ear convincing her that what happened was rape
Be very, very careful. Honestly I'd recommend you stay the fuck away from her completely, there is no way this ends well for you
dongpal 6y ago
and whats the problem with just saying that you fooled around?
RedWinter88 6y ago
Because she “doesn’t remember” but you do = she was too drunk to consent but you were fine. Anything you respond with could be used against you in court.
nofilmynofucky 6y ago
It's 2018 dude that's not how this works anymore
The_Lightskin_Wonder 6y ago
A lot of people are saying ignore the text, but I think not answering is an omission of guilt, I think it would be better to say you were completely drunk as fuck as well and that you only remember her trying to do "xyz" and "I think we ended up making out lol"
If she was drunk af then she didn't have consent, so I'm hoping this wasn't the case and she did make some type of initiation. You want to show you have nothing to hide, and nothing to say either. If she is trying to save face then so be it; who cares. you don't want to find out she is all of a sudden "believing" she was raped because she regrets having sex.
Tell everyone you just made out with her, they can't prove otherwise unless they watched your dick go inside her vagina. Don't kiss and tell anyways right?
juliusstreicher 6y ago
Worst advice ever. If you admit one thing, it can be processed into a full admission of whatever the prosecutor tells the jury to believe. If he admits touching her, all she has to do is say "I did not consent, because I was too drunk to consent" and he's got a sexual assault conviction.
No, he just wants to show that he has nothing to say. Everybody has something to hide, and the 'showing that he has nothing to hide' has got a good number of convictions. This guy fucked her. She denied knowing about it. How the fuck will the jury rule?
The_Lightskin_Wonder 6y ago
If he leads with her saying "I don't know , I was drunk, I only remember (specific events that were true) and you trying to kiss me at some point lol, maybe we ended up making out"
What is she going to say to that? "No, I know you fucked me?"
If that's the case OP can feign ignorance and put himself in her shoes.
Otherwise she will probably just agree to it, thus also admitting nothing did happen.
juliusstreicher 6y ago
She's already set him up for failure, tho.
The choice she gave him was "So, did you just paw me, or fuck me...while I was drunk?" Sounds like this is being used as evidence...to me.
the_real_lunch_box 6y ago
dont think ignoring could be good. she might see it as you trying to avoid the situation. be forthcoming and ask your friends what they can remember. Also ask her friends what they saw, if her friends can confirm she was into it perhaps you can avoid trouble.
quieroser 6y ago
This exact thing happened to me 25 years ago. The right answer: " I blacked out too, and I don't remember shit, have a good day"
DntPnicIGotThis 6y ago
don't
sixseven89 6y ago
"idk i was drunk too lol"
juliusstreicher 6y ago
"IDK, I had sex with you and can't even guess if I your consent lol" said #4123842.
daisy_plum 6y ago
Honestly
cl3537 6y ago
"I don't know if we had sex, but you were real good at ATM"
[deleted] 6y ago
Next
or
Tell her we'll replay/retrace last night, and make plans
bluefingerblue 6y ago
“Just fooled around ????”
PowerTalk. She knows that you know she knows. Also puts you in a kiss but don’t tell box so she feels like she can do things with you that’ll never get found out.
QuiteRandomDUDE 6y ago
If this happened to me, I'd say Yeah, we fooled around. Wanna grab a drink/whatever later? To comfort her.
I wouldn't mention sex, especially via text, especially when she "doesn't remember"
This works ofc if you want to see her again.
[deleted] 6y ago
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RememberWhenEye 6y ago
Then buy your own cuffs and put yourself away, save yourself the trouble of going through the trial.