It kinda sucks but I think it has to do with my level of social skills or possibly confidence or maybe I’m just making this story up in my head.. I don’t know but any advice is appreciated.
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Ricklogical 5y ago
Sad to say but I compete with all of my male friends. I am currently taken, they fear the day I am single, all of them distrust me a little bit, especially since any woman around me focuses on me and I am polite and caring to all of them.
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Would I fuck any of the women my dudes are with? No, but they still worry about it silently.
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I only really spend time with my male friends if we are doing something productive together. I don't just 'hang around and shoot the shit' and that tends to help. We do side jobs together, we fix the car together, we take our children to the park, whatever but we are busy and we don't tend to talk much.
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But I'm more of a loner, and if men around you seem annoyed by you, probably a good idea to find some new friends or be alone. Up to you, confront them directly or don't. Communication solves 90% of all problems.
rockyp32 5y ago
Seems like you got some interesting relationships with your friends but I guess everyone’s different
BlackTemplar1989 5y ago
Back in the days when men had testosterone they would see you as a challenge to work on themselves.
Now all those men are just victims of circumstances and rather cry silently than take action themselves.
ChadTheWaiter100 5y ago
It’s funny. That days pre-trp I truly believed some of these men were ride or die. I mentioned on here previously that 2 of my 3 closest friends fucked my girlfriend while I was in ICU. Of the 2 that fucked her, I had opportunities to fuck both of their girlfriends.
Their girlfriends would openly flirt with me and on a few occasions, I had the opportunity to fuck. Now that I’m a man, I take responsibility for the fact that i should have never allowed myself to be in those situations. But at the end of the day- I did NOT have sex with either of their girlfriends bc I so strongly believed in loyalty. This of course was before the fact that I realized what happened behind my back.
But I can relate- a lot of guys will tell me- don’t steal my girl or some shit like that. This I don’t understand bc the times that guys have told me that I’ve made no intention that I would try to fuck their girlfriends at all.
oyoungpadawan 5y ago
Yeah man they can be vicious, I know some girls who fucked whole groups of friends and drove them apart.
If friends say they'd never do it it's just because they don't get the chance to, if they are able to fuck your gf most of em will.
Same with exes.
ChadTheWaiter100 5y ago
Absolutely. After that happened I really raised the bar. I started going for girls that I knew they couldn’t pull. To the point where when I was done with them I intentionally tried to pass them and they refused to fuck my friends.
I don’t think my current girlfriend would fuck any of them. What I mean by that is- 1 she isn’t a slut like ex but 2 even if she was single they’re just not her type.
I think ONE of my friends would actually say no if given the chance. Reason being- one night he was drunk and he called me to ask about a girl idgaf about ( my cousin). He said -hey bro this is wierd but I see your cousin at a party. Do you care if I fuck her?
I got a good laugh out of it. I was stoned and just got off of work. Maybe like 20 years old. It was like 1 am. I said of course! Idgaf. You know Ifgaf. He said i figured you wouldn’t mind I just wanted to ask you anyway.
HurricaneHugues 5y ago
What was the story behind all that? How old were u all? How long had u been with the girl? Why were u in the ICU? How did u find out? Tell your story.
Ricklogical 5y ago
I don't know, I was raised that it's just sex and cheating happens. I always assumed the women I was with were going to cheat. A few times I was single and helped a girl cheat. Had nothing to do with my 'respect' for the man they were with. It's not a fucking crime at all, even if they are married.
People don't like to realize that. It's totally fucking legal, yes Adultery is a thing, but no, it's not against the law at all.
Should be, but it isn't. Shit causes wars man.
markinsinz7 5y ago
And these days ur busy fuckin all the girlfriends around. How life changes
ChadTheWaiter100 5y ago
Honestly bro I haven’t even considered fucking their girls. My success in life has given me all the revenge I’d ever want against anyone who’s plotted on me.
nathanissleepy 5y ago
There’s no single answer for this, you just need to be analytical and take mental notes when talking to others. Find out what’s annoying about yourself and fix it. For me it was mainly that I would try too hard to force things I was fixated on and I was too unconfident and quiet when talking to others. I’m still working on those issues now but things get easier when you’re aware of it. Remember that it’s not about being someone else, it’s about fixing your own small issues and bettering yourself.
This is probably not what you are looking to hear but after taking LSD my social skills, self awareness, and overall personality developed tremendously. I would also recommend meditation
rockyp32 5y ago
Yeah I don’t think I’ll go the drug route but I hear taking ayahuasca forces you to face your trauma
Ricklogical 5y ago
You experienced trauma? Ayahuasca is no joke, LSD in many cases is a much more mild experience. Problem with drugs is usually purity unless you do something like magic mushrooms or smoke weed. Potency levels still apply but drugs are drugs man, ayahuasca is like the second strongest drug on the planet.
nathanissleepy 5y ago
Yeah they aren’t really comparable. LSD isn’t for everyone but if you’re looking for more clarity of your thoughts it can be a really good tool just make sure you know what you’re doing. Definitely would still recommend meditation though, more of this is in your head than you think it is
rockyp32 5y ago
As a kid I meant I’ve heard it can cure it
WillSalt 5y ago
As long as you have a good trip sitter Ayahuasca is really good for working on emotional stuff.
WillSalt 5y ago
If you can handle being nauseated and puke a couple times I would say ayahuasca is a lot more "controlled". I can see how people would describe it as strong, but more in a way that makes you confront emotions and rumination. I'm surprised anyone would place in among the top two strongest though, as it doesn't make you hallucinate as LSD does and you are less likely to get a bad trip.
Bufo Alvaris blows them both out of the water though. The single most profound experience of my life. Complete loss of ego and a feeling of just being one with everything.
Ricklogical 5y ago
Maybe I wouldn't. I've had DMT which I heard was similar but I took it from a pipe so it hit very quickly and I just assumed it was the same. I don't like to throw up so I haven't ever been interested. I mean in drugs in general for over a decade.. It was fun but not real fun. Real overwhelming and uncomfortable but... Not fun.
Ricklogical 5y ago
Maybe I wouldn't. I've had DMT which I heard was similar but I took it from a pipe so it hit very quickly and I just assumed it was the same. I don't like to throw up so I haven't ever been interested. I mean in drugs in general for over a decade.. It was fun but not real fun. Real overwhelming and uncomfortable but... Not fun.
MattyAnon Admin 5y ago
You can't get on with everyone and shouldn't try to. People get hatey for all sorts of other reasons including jealous and sometimes two people bond over hating someone else. Don't take it personally. Be civil but avoid them - they may even come around in future.
Keep working on your social skills, but don't spend time with people who don't like you or are annoyed by you.
rockyp32 5y ago
Sometimes I just can’t tell sometimes it seems like they like me sometimes it seem like they don’t but both of them are pretty shy too so they just might be hiding their emotions and acting tough ya know. My biggest problem socially is probably how I speak I have a very deep voice but I’m really bad at taking my time and pronouncing my words so I mumble a lot and god it’s the worst feeling when someone says they can’t hear me it’s just bad. I don’t know what it is but it’s like I never learned how to speak naturally or loudly I always try to contain my self or some shit you know instead of just letting my voice out. Like I don’t wanna speak so loud that other people outside who I’m talking to can hear me. So I think my bad vocal skills make me seem like I have low confidence or that I’m stupid or some shit. Any advice on fixing that ? I’ve been trying to read out loud a lot and that’s helped a bit but it hasn’t fixed it. Also I notice that when I am able to open up my voice it’s like my body stops tensing up I relax and open up
MattyAnon Admin 5y ago
God this is fucking irritating. You can only say "eh? you what? say again? please repeat that?" before it's just annoying as fuck and I'd rather ignore you.
Learn to speak really slowly, clearly enunciating every. single. syllable. No matter how retarded it feels, learn to do it.
You can teach yourself this, and honestly I'd rather have someone fucking shouting slowly than fucking mumbling. What the fuck can I do with a mumble? I can't respond correctly, I have no idea what you are talking about, and I'm not going to say "pardon?" more than once.
It's not even this..... I suspect it's just fucking annoying. It's not that mumbling is low SMV...... it's that mumbling is inherently fucking annoying. You're a grown man. Learn to fucking speak louder, slower and be understood.
Forget all the confidence, SMV, "they don't like me", social skills and everything else. Ditch worrying about ALL of that for 6 months. Focus simply on being able to be understood. Slow. Clear. Loud.
One thing at once. Learn to have your words understood. Even if people disagree, it's a lot less fucking annoying than mumbling.
I knew a mumbler once... a bit. I simply avoided him after a while because trying to communicate was so painful.
rockyp32 5y ago
Yeah great advice bro thanks I notice that it also waxes and wanes some times I’m really good at speaking sometimes I can’t. I got drunk last night and I had no problems speaking so I think I just need to make speaking clearly a habit will help.