I have been experimenting and have found that texting a girl and getting her to open up before the first date, significantly increases my chances of getting a date. This goes against TRP's advice of "text only for logistics".
I have found that texting for logistics would make a girl ghost.
Why do you guys think this is?
P.S. Should I text girls less after the first date or the first fuck?
noPTSDformePlease 5y ago
The "only text for logistics" rule was put in place for dudes who would have long drawn out convos over text but never actually get the balls together to ask the girl out.
In truth, you should text at the right level that fits your personal communication style but the right level is probably way less than you think it is.
Psychocist 5y ago
Yeh but the question is why would you text more when you don't have to? I literally do only text for logistics, sometimes to respond to their texts, but mostly one/two word replies. And I've had plenty of plates do all the chasing and maintenance for me. I just give em a good time when I see em. They take care of themselves.
During initial interaction I've found you have to put more work in, no doubt. But after you've hooked someone there really is no need to chase/text them at all. Those girls who like you will come back for more.
Chaddeus_Rex 5y ago
I see. I like to text back and forth a bit and ask the girl out. I guess it can't hurt then?
chazthundergut 5y ago
It's a great way to establish some rapport. But you must get her number, must get a date planned, and do it early.
somebullshitrp 5y ago
Texting for logistics only is great advice for 95% of the guys on here. It's mainly because most guys can't build attraction over text; it's very hard to generate tingles or excitement when you're not in front of a girl.
There's a subtle art to flirting over text. You absolutely don't want to give her free attention; where she can hit you up whenever she's lonely, or in need of validation and get a response. That's the main problem with texting women as I see it. Your attention is where your value lies.
However, if you can effectively flirt over text, with a good mix of push/pull, and sexually suggestive conversation, she'll be primed when you meet.
I flirt over text, completely ignoring the recommendations made here, to great success. It's really up to you to calibrate and use the appropriate tools in your tool box. If you're successful texting for more than logistics, then do it. If you're not, then don't.
Chaddeus_Rex 5y ago
Attraction can be built? I thought it exists or doesn't and can be lost if one is needy.
somebullshitrp 5y ago
Attraction always ebbs and flows. You can absolutely build on a base level of attraction. That base attraction already exists, or she wouldn't be texting you in the first place. Most guys go the wrong direction with texting and end up killing attraction, but you can build it as well.
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Pluglord 5y ago
Psychocist 5y ago
Have you tried both with and without this? That seems to be the only way to attribute the success. Could have nothing to do with your texting and everything to do with your presence when you meet.
somebullshitrp 5y ago
I have tried it both ways.
Back in my blue pill days I would flirt over text with great success, even though I was a fat beta slug...
Then after swallowing the red pill, I stopped flirting and used texting only for logistics. My success rate for scheduling dates/hookups with women over text really sucked for a year or so before I realized that I should go back to flirting over text.
Once I went back to flirting, my texting successes went way up. Add that to the massive improvements I've seen from implementing the red pill, and things are working out just fine ????
P.s. Bitches love smilies
Psychocist 5y ago
I do flirt sometimes, but I think recently I've just lost interest... and, yes, the flakiness of the women has increased. But after I've hooked someone the text game changes completely (for me). I just don't text, and it is like catnip to 'em.
[deleted] 5y ago
Texting for reasons other than logistics is actually a shitty way of building comfort if you don't have enough already. Easy to misconstrew words but can be an tool.
Chaddeus_Rex 5y ago
Yeah ive heard this argument before. That is why i am confused by why i get more success when texting
[deleted] 5y ago
I just told you why. Comfort is important
Chaddeus_Rex 5y ago
Icic thanks
poochman 5y ago
Is this for online/tinder girls you haven't met yet? Texting for logistics only does not apply to girls you haven't met yet. You need them to invest somewhat first before they will agree to meet you and not flake. The amount of texting before a girl will meet you varies by girl and the SMV in your pictures basically.
However, with girls you HAVE met you need to text only for logistics. The theory here is that you should already have them intrigued/attracted enough to meet you again and you don't want to mess that up by being too needy/revealing too much in text. If they don't want to meet you again, nothing you text is going to change that anyway. There's literally no upside to texting non-logistics either way.
Chaddeus_Rex 5y ago
This is for both girls i met in person via daygame and for online girls. In either case I find girls flaking or ghosting if i text for logistics before first date.
So what i am getting is that the lower smv the more you need to text before she meets up?
poochman 5y ago
For online, the lower her initial interest level (from your pictures) the more you'll need to text probably before she meets up. You can tell by the length of her texts how interested she is. If she's sending walls of text after you simply ask how her day is going, you can tell she's highly interested and you can ask for the meet up pretty quickly. One word answers are going to take more texting.
For girls you've already met in person, too many flakes mean you aren't doing enough to hook their interest in that initial interaction. Try to escalate/go an insta-date/game them more before asking for the number. I'm not a daygame expert so you'll need to dig into daygame more to see how others do it successfully.
Chaddeus_Rex 5y ago
Everything you said makes sense. Thanks. What are other hooks beyond the ones you listed?
poochman 5y ago
Again I'm not a daygame expert but more push/pull. Joke with her but also found out more about her/where she's from/interests in that first initial interaction. If she's not walking away, then she's interested and keep going for as long as time allows (for you or her). Also, if she's asking about you, then you know she's interested as well.
Then maybe you can make a call back to a joke you made or something about her in your first text to her (to make her remember who you are) before you ask to meet up.
VasiliyZaitzev 5y ago
This is a general rule for guys who can't get out of their own way. If something else works better for you, on average, then do that.
Morphs_ 5y ago
I fully agree with you. Especially if it was an online match you need to establish some rapport first.
But yes, after the first fuck you can dial down the texting a bit, although I still have some convos.
Some guy take the "logistics" part to literal and usr no calibration whatsoever. Reading those chat logs make me cringe.
ImQuitingPorn 5y ago
Same for me. My text game is absolutely on point, I tease them to the point that they cant wait for that first date.
Just make sure you stick to your words once you two meet, so you dont end up being pussy.
Chaddeus_Rex 5y ago
How do you tease over text without the girl being butthurt?
BlackFire68 5y ago
The reason a little bit of texting works is that it "isolates" her. That is, when she's texting you... it's you.
infamous3238 5y ago
It depends. Are you meeting these girls online or on a dating app? They have to be somewhat familiar with you to feel comfortable enough to meet up with a stranger for the first time. If its a girl you met in person and already built rapport with, then only text for logistics.
Chaddeus_Rex 5y ago
Both online and from cold approach
chachaChad 5y ago
RP rules work in most cases. If you're better at gaming over text than most guys, great. Write it down for the rest of us chumps.
SwoleyMoleyFrijoley 5y ago
If you are a chatty Kathy and can be charming via text, do it. Just don't be all " Whatcha thinkin' 'bout?". She doesn't need another girlfriend.
Datanami 5y ago
Texting for logistics, in my opinion, is only for when you have the girl locked down as a plate or similar. That means when you already had sex with her at least twice with a few days in between.
IVIaskerade 5y ago
The difference is that you're putting a bunch of effort into it to get a date with a girl. With that same amount of time and effort texting for logistics only, I've texted fifty girls and gotten five dates.
Sure, you have a higher success rate. But I'm still getting laid more.
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cptgoatsack 5y ago
I don't always ghost after setting up the first date but I avoid asking generic shit like "how's your day" etc... Communicate in short bursts, maybe just say what you're doing if it's interesting but when in doubt just ghost. I probably wouldn't bother texting if the date was the next day though.
NewBoomAction 5y ago
I enjoy texting them as well in an effort to build comfort and rapport. I go for cocky funny. I neg. And whatever else.
My rules: 1) reply back in a logical amount of time. 2) less is more. 3) keep it flirty and fun. 4) most important... be direct!
I never want them to forget I'm not just a friend. I'm a potential mate.
Chaddeus_Rex 5y ago
How do you neg over text without them getting butthurt and ghost? Or finding your jokes weird/creepy? There is no body language/context over text and i have found girls ghosting with that. I use it mainly to get her to open up. Also how do you get her to view u as a potential mate?
NewBoomAction 5y ago
I get her to view me as a mate cause all I do is try to hang out with her lol. She knows I love being with her. If I don't get what I want I withdraw the amount I text. Sometimes you apply that time to a girl who'll get with u guaranteed.
Chaddeus_Rex 5y ago
Ah. So it only works with girls youve hung out/banged?
Peter_B_Long 5y ago
It also depends on how you met them. If it was a cold approach or you met in person, then texting only for logistics is fine because she's already met you and doesn't need that comfort. If it's tinder or other online apps then talking a little more should help and make you seem less creepy. Just don't write paragraphs and reply in 2 minutes
Chaddeus_Rex 5y ago
I find it to be the case for both cold approach and online. Ill generally reply once a day and about in equal amounts to her response.
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Chaddeus_Rex 5y ago
I see. Id text her once a day with a long response to her equally long questions and statements about her life.
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Chaddeus_Rex 5y ago
Why would you not recommend?
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Chaddeus_Rex 5y ago
Yes I have.
Ive tried what you say, but Ive found that girls would ghost/flake on dates if i didnt text them a bit before asking them out.
youcantdenythat 5y ago
Texting too much, too much comfort, = beta.
If you have stunning looks = alpha.
If you just met someone and don't have stunning looks, yeah, text a little, you need a little comfort or she won't even meet you. Too little texting might be creepy for her.
Beta gets success too, but she's not going to be as submissive to you, she will likely get bored of you, will likely make you wait a few dates for sex, and all the other problems that come from being beta-ish.
Dark_T100 5y ago
Out of curiosity, how tall / built / attractive are you?
Chaddeus_Rex 5y ago
I am 6'2, have a male pattern baldness (so buzz cut my hair), wear glasses and weigh about 195lbs at 15% bodyfat.