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8 - [RedPillWomen] How do you approach a first date?

[-] sodadrop 4 Points 7 months ago

I'm open to a relationship, but I'm not actively pursing one. While I do feel that I have a lot of improving still to do, I want to be careful not to become so focused on being "perfect" that I miss out on a good guy because I feel like I haven't achieved perfection yet. I also (not sure if this a the correct RPW thing to do?) wouldn't mind getting practice dating and trying to implement RPW; hopefully practice would help me frame my goals better and pinpoint what I need to work on.

Thank you for the advice :)

21 - [RedPillWomen] Field Report: First date after discovering RPW

[-] sodadrop 3 Points 7 months ago

Ahh you're right. I think I lost my perspective for a minute; I was disappointed because someone rejected me, but I guess what really matters is liking and being liked by the right guy, not by every guy.

21 - [RedPillWomen] Field Report: First date after discovering RPW

[-] sodadrop 3 Points 7 months ago

Very true. I did look up pictures of the restaurant beforehand (I even picked out what I was going to order lol) and the dress seemed perfectly acceptable, though slightly on the dressier side. My dilemma arose because I like wearing dresses and I wanted to look as pretty as possible (achievable with the dress) but I also didn't want him to think that I was trying too hard. I would've felt very comfortable in the same outfit if I had been going to that restaurant with friends, but I guess I mainly just felt uncomfortable because he was dressed more casually than me and I felt like he was judging me for trying too hard. Of course, that perception could've easily just been me overthinking things and being insecure. I guess it was also just kind of a hit or miss situation because he could've been one of those guys who likes girls in dresses or guy who wanted to appear very relaxed.

21 - [RedPillWomen] Field Report: First date after discovering RPW

[-] sodadrop 1 Point 7 months ago

I guess I got excited because compared to the guys I'd gone out with before discovering RPW, he seemed to be leagues closer to Captain material. But I still have tons to learn about RPW and what makes a good Captain. The journey continues :)

21 - [RedPillWomen] Field Report: First date after discovering RPW

[-] sodadrop 1 Point 7 months ago

Yes! I borrowed The Surrendered Single from my library and I've been reading it these past few weeks. I loove it and I'm really trying to apply the advice to my life. However, it was one thing for me to read the bits about being quiet and using the date to evaluate him and think "Oh, I can do that!", and another to actually try to implement that on a date when all I wanted to do was impress him lol. I was trying so hard not to run my mouth, but it looks like I need some more practice :) Thanks so much for offering access to the book, that's so sweet!

21 - [RedPillWomen] Field Report: First date after discovering RPW

[-] sodadrop 1 Point 7 months ago

Yes, we're both 20. It was my first dinner date so I wasn't expecting perfection, but there's this part of me that still wants to be liked by absolutely everyone and for everything to always work out. Reading through the comments here has definitely helped me get a better perspective on that

21 - [RedPillWomen] Field Report: First date after discovering RPW

[-] sodadrop 1 Point 7 months ago

Maybe, but he introduced himself to me in person so I'm not sure why he would be okay with what I looked like then but change his mind two weeks later. Either way, I'm ~ regular weight. I don't think anyone would describe me as chubby, but they wouldn't describe me as stick-thin either.

I think you're right about it just not being a match. I still have a lot to learn about RPW, including the leading methods, as you mentioned.

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